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Old 10-08-2011, 11:12 AM
 
Location: SoCal desert
8,093 posts, read 13,227,512 times
Reputation: 14870

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A friend at work told me this one. She had her 5 year old grandson staying with her for the weekend.

"Grandma, can we go out for lunch?"
"Sounds like a fun time. It's a date!"
"It's not a date! We're just friends!"
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Old 10-08-2011, 11:39 PM
 
Location: Nebraska
1,141 posts, read 1,004,160 times
Reputation: 981
I was eating dinner at my son's house about two weeks ago. My three year old great-granddaughter was going on and on about her friends at preschool. She turns to my son and says "Now grandpa, You don't have to worry about me and boys" He nearly choked on his food. I almost fell out of my chair laughing.
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Old 10-13-2011, 06:56 AM
 
Location: Texas
14,078 posts, read 17,657,689 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Norm Barnes View Post
The other day my ex and I were at a party for our Gandchildren Bobby and Becca who celebrate their Birthday about 10 days a part. My son served up some shrimp and sauce and some Buffalo Wings. My grandson Colin ( 5 yrs young) sat on my lap and was chomping on a Shrimp when a news article came on about water being infected by a brain eating amoeba - just like out of a "zombie" movie. He stood up went forward to the table and spit out his shrimp. I asked him what he was doing and he said -- "Shrimp swim in water". After I assured him the shrimp was safe he began eating them again. No lie it shows how our children and grandchildren have and can be impacted and the very surprising results that go by noticed and not noticed.

Years ago, when our youngest daughter was about 5 or so, she suddenly disappeared. We frantically searched until we found her hiding in the clothes hamper. It turned out she'd heard a story on the TV about a car load of "aliens" being apprehended in South Texas and, not understanding the difference, thought the earth was under attack from outer space.
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Old 10-13-2011, 07:01 AM
 
Location: Texas
14,078 posts, read 17,657,689 times
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When the eldest grand kid was about 3 or so, she was banging on the bathroom door trying to get my son (about 10 then) to come out. He was, and still is, an inveterate practical joker and refused.

Finally, she gave up, backed up a step or two and said, "Alright then! F--k you!"

What? She not only knew the word, but how to use it too!
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Old 10-13-2011, 07:04 AM
 
Location: Texas
14,078 posts, read 17,657,689 times
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....and then...there is this:




Damn Bananas - YouTube


Who on earth would teach a grandkid such a joke?
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Old 10-13-2011, 08:19 AM
Status: "Recipe for failure. Overanalyze." (set 4 days ago)
 
Location: Glen Mills
706 posts, read 856,191 times
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Somehow when I read that she said it -- I couldn't help thinking of Whoopi Goldberg in "Sister Act" when she said "Bless You!!!". Maybe we can rehabilitate her. Funny story.
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Old 10-13-2011, 04:37 PM
 
Location: Texas
14,078 posts, read 17,657,689 times
Reputation: 7720
Quote:
Originally Posted by Norm Barnes View Post
Somehow when I read that she said it -- I couldn't help thinking of Whoopi Goldberg in "Sister Act" when she said "Bless You!!!". Maybe we can rehabilitate her. Funny story.
Too late. She's now 22 and has kids of her own for me to ruin, if at all possible.
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Old 10-20-2011, 04:10 AM
 
16,437 posts, read 19,131,529 times
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When my brunette daughter was still a teen, she would say "I just had a blonde moment!" when she did something mallet-headed. I dryly remarked once "Do you have any idea what color my hair was before it went white?"
"You were a blonde?!? Gosh, no wonder you didn't understand the joke!"
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Old 12-23-2011, 08:03 AM
Status: "Recipe for failure. Overanalyze." (set 4 days ago)
 
Location: Glen Mills
706 posts, read 856,191 times
Reputation: 438
Default Santa Claus - Sort of scarey when you are young???

I was just recalling going with a friend and his wife to the mall one christmas. Their 4 year old had been filled with what we thought would be excited anticipation -- wrong. Getting him to Santa was easy getting him on his lap was a different story. I've got to get a copy of the picture and post it some day. Each time the Dad placed him near Santa the child's face melted into a frown and tears -- each time he pulled him back the child stopped his tears. This went about 3 - 4 times until finally Dad got the message -- Wayne was too young to enjoy Santa this year. I'm telling you the tears on and off was comical.
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Old 12-23-2011, 09:02 AM
 
Location: Florida -
8,760 posts, read 10,834,959 times
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When my daughter was about 4, we took a trip to Miami. After hearing us talk repeatedly about what we would do in Miami, our daughter piped-up, "When we get to 'YOUR'-ami, can I stay in the hotel too?"
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