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Old 01-15-2012, 08:43 AM
 
Location: Oxygen Ln. AZ
9,321 posts, read 16,575,490 times
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We have 3 fantastic kids. The two older girls were harder to bring up than the son we had at almost 40. He was our mid life crisis. They all turned out to be great humans, the oldest daughter getting her masters and the middle daughter just got married to a very nice young man. The son is taking nursing then joining the air force. I could not imagine life without them.
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Old 01-16-2012, 01:21 AM
 
4,649 posts, read 6,479,224 times
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Never wanted kids or a wife...People thought I was strange but I smiled a lot more than they did.
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Old 01-16-2012, 05:18 AM
 
361 posts, read 621,035 times
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I don't take credit for the fact that my kids turned out to be fine people.
Much more sensible and competent than I ever was.
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Old 01-16-2012, 11:01 AM
 
Location: Lexington, SC
4,281 posts, read 10,732,445 times
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I have a 44 year old son, never married, no children. Always had a steady or live-in girl friend but the minute marriage/children came up, he said thanks but no thanks.

Many of his male friends his age, even the ones that used to ask when he was going to marry, freely admit they would trade places with him in heartbeat. Many say they have had enough of wives and kids. They would like out (and some have gotten out)....but they also ask him not to tell their wives/girl friends.....LOL

Some of their remorse is the wife, but I believe much of the remorse is the whole " traditional family" thing that many went for when younger.

My son admits this past holiday season was emotionally tough as he is between girl friends but once over and talking with his buddies, he is once again thankful his life is as it is.
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Old 01-16-2012, 02:43 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
21,535 posts, read 43,982,964 times
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Oh, indeed, kids are no piece of cake. They're with you your entire life. Very, very important to choose the proper mate. Breeding is everything, in my experience. Look at that person, look at that person's family. Same with self. Genetic traits emotional and physical. It's amazing how 'not far from the tree' offspring fall. Genetics have an enormous bearing on how well (or not) the kids turn out. Perhaps a bad trait misses one of them, but hits the other.

My side of the family is stolid German/Croatian (the crazy side). My cousin (same bloodline both sides) married a Norwegian man raised on a farm in rural WI, had his MS, worked as an engineer at GM (and the space program) his entire life. Their two sons, in the end, turned out all right - hard and consistent workers. But not before the oldest got off the track, just like his mother's brother, when hormones took over in his teens and he started a family before he had his education. But, now, finally, after 20 years of marriage, he has a masters (father footing the bill not to mention twice bailing son's family out of huge credit card debt), and is teaching H.S. Prior to this, one crappy job after the other. His oldest son just went off to MI State to study engineering - grandpa paying the bill there, too.

Cousin's other son, his brother, is a CPA married to a computer whiz. They have no kids, dote on their niece and nephew, and are very happy that way. He saw how his older brother had screwed up his life for so long and wasn't going down that path. Very deliberately and consciously careful about whom he chose to marry.

I could have been happy either way. Like someone said upthread, knowing what I know now and didn't see at the time, I would, at the very least, have definitely chosen a different mate for procreation.

Last edited by Ariadne22; 01-16-2012 at 03:48 PM..
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Old 01-16-2012, 02:57 PM
 
Location: SW MO
23,605 posts, read 31,471,910 times
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Default As seniors, do you regret having had children?

Not in the slightest. But I regret some others did!
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Old 01-16-2012, 02:59 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
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LOL, indeed.
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Old 01-16-2012, 03:06 PM
 
Location: Maine at last
399 posts, read 746,044 times
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We had 3 daughters and life was great (little girls are so sweet). It took a lot of sacrifice and work but we made it through all the difficult years. Now that they are older the oldest and the youngest both want to run our lives for us. We're not interested in that so it makes it rather difficult in many ways. They seem to know what's best for us, what we should eat, how we should live etc.. It makes it hard to keep the parent ideals because they are now adults and difficult to disagree with. We love them to death but give us a break and leave us alone! The oldest lives with us and the youngest is always over as well. I often say "never again" but I'm usually kidding but really..?
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Old 01-16-2012, 03:17 PM
 
Location: SW Missouri
15,847 posts, read 30,349,542 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Minervah View Post
That is very true. I regret some things I did and some things I didn't do in the past but not having children was a decision I made that I am still good with.

The thing is, too many people have kids without thinking about it. It should be a very well thought out decision but all to often it is not. That's where you have child abuse. Suddenly there is this life for which one has to be responsible and that is not always something everyone can handle. So the parent takes it out on the child.

It's difficult for people who truly want to have children to understand the feelings of people who do not. I have no feelings for kids and never did. It made no more sense to me to have children than it would have been to have anything else I couldn't feel strongly for.

So for me it wasn't so much economics or having someone to care for me in my old age. It's just that I never wanted to take the path of parenting in my life. I think many childfree people would agree with this.
I totally agree with your point of view. I have never been interested in children. Other people see kids and say... AWWWW, I see kids and think EWWWWW. In my life they have always been a necessary evil but not something I wanted to interact with CERTAINLY not something I wanted to be responsible for 24/7 365 18+years. no way.

20yrsinBranson
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Old 01-16-2012, 03:25 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
21,535 posts, read 43,982,964 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 20yrsinBranson View Post
CERTAINLY not something I wanted to be responsible for 24/7 365 18+years. no way.
Far more than 18+ years. It is not only them, it is their spouses, kids and all the problems that go along with. It is a LIFETIME commitment. My aunt and uncle bailed my male cousin out twice after his two divorces. My other cousin has had to support her older son's family and his adult education and now grandson's education. Good thing they have the money.
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