Am I in denial? Has anyone else felt this way besides me? (adults, husband)
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Maybe a bit, but it all deals with my "mindset" as I approach this milestone in my life; for my age is telling me one thing, but my mind and heart is telling me another. I don't really want retirement to change my outward appearance, and this is my quandary, for I am afraid it might. Does that make sense??
This thread has been a very interesting read. I keep asking myself if I am in "denial" and keep coming up with "No". lol I remember waking up on my 60th b'day and being astounded that I was that old! It lasted about 20 minutes.
Why should retirement change your outward appearance?? I guess I don't 'get' that idea. I think I can say that I changed my own outward appearance but only because I quit wearing makeup. I was working outdoors a year ago and I got tired of all that makeup "melting" and running into my eyes and down my neck so decided to go without. Well...NOBODY even noticed! lol Then I looked around and noticed that most of the older women I work with were also sans makeup and nobody cares. Seems to me that it's OUR choice whether we change our outward appearance, or not. Since I'm not interested in attracting the opposite sex that may have something to do with it but I really don't think so. It's just what I feel comfortable with. If I felt self concious I'd change it but I don't. I used to joke that I needed a new trowel because it was getting harder to fill in all the wrinkles. LOL Although my "wrinkles" really aren't THAT bad for an ol' lady. I'll soon be 69 and can honestly say that, even though I've been "comfortable in my own skin" for many years already, I just keep on feeling MORE comfortable. Part of that is not giving a rip what other people think but I've felt that way since my early 40s.
Oh yes, I remember my working days in Phoenix when my makeup would melt before I got to work early in the morning. Finally gave that stuff up about ten years ago in favor of SPF50!
Saturday I am going to be 63 and I really don't care what people think. I keep myself clean and neat but mostly comfortable for my post meno body. In my experience, I have a total blast just smiling and having spontaneous conversations with people at the store and watching how they react. A few weeks ago two young guys were talking to me and it was nice to just enjoy the converstation without the other things.
My girlfriend painted my portrait a few weeks ago and it was interesting to see how I look through her eyes. She said more than anything she wanted to capture my sparking eyes, so no matter what the hair color or how deep the wrinkles, just keep your eyes smiling and the rest will be as it should.
Were you on Meds? With out them , I don't think I could have survived.. Now as I get better ( hope) , getting off slowly will be another challenge... There is always that chance the Cancer could come back, that's a worry, every three months with the ultra Sounds, but I am learning to handle it....Things move slowly in rural places. The trips to Mayo in snow storms, and all that was not so bad, it was in not knowing I think that set off the depression. I think the not knowing leading up to the Operation was the worse thing. The pain was intense after. getting a tonsil removed is no small matter when you are old.
I should be on top of the world, Cancer free, body of a much younger guy,diabetes free , 30 lbs lighter I know, so, I won't be a complainer others are much worse off than me. Its those EMS rides to the Hospital that are embarrassing, and expensive, I must learn to control.my IBS and chest pains that are gas and an upset upper GI., and not a heart attack..I had one Sunday at the Art fair...I told them , but no one would listen, so off I went for 2-5 hours. This happens about twice a year, and no one really knows whats wrong other than my IBS which I have had for many years, and many EMS rides, all over the Country.
The bottom line is , you can learn to handle a lot of bad things, including pain, but its the worry in your head that's so hard to control.I am not there yet, but am working on it. Thanks to all the folks who are reading between the lines and offering their support . Having a understanding wife helps a lot, but, friends and family can only take so much....That's just one more reason turning 70 is so traumatic.
No, no meds for me if I can avoid them.
I wish you the best of health! I firmly believe that health is not just physical, but emotional and spiritual. I have learned a lot of techniques to deal with certain things (EFT, etc.) I also try to eat organic as much as I can, to stay positive as much as possible, do something enjoyable every day, etc.
HEHEHE well this brought a smile to my face as you regaled your tale of woe!!! Nice writing! But with that said, I am glad that your "sanity" has returned. I am a new G'ma as well and I agree with you that it is a great feeling and really "grounds" us in reality. BUT they (as I will have a second one in Oct), has not kept me from my plans of living 6 months in Europe and 6 here at least for 2 years, and my children are good with that.
That is a wonderful plan .. go for it. I have always wanted to spend some time in Italy. But I still have places in the US I want to see too.
Also, I really had a hard time turning 20 ... no longer a teen! But nothing bothered me like the big FIVE O. I'm just happy to know I wasn't alone. It's just good to be on this side of the dirt.
I came across the following quote today and thought it appropriate for this conversation:
"I've made an odd discovery. Every time I talk to a savant I feel quite sure that happiness is no longer a possibility. Yet when I talk with my gardener, I'm convinced of the opposite."
[RIGHT]--Bertrand Russell,
British philosopher and mathematician
[/RIGHT]
Oh yes, I remember my working days in Phoenix when my makeup would melt before I got to work early in the morning. Finally gave that stuff up about ten years ago in favor of SPF50!
Saturday I am going to be 63 and I really don't care what people think. I keep myself clean and neat but mostly comfortable for my post meno body. In my experience, I have a total blast just smiling and having spontaneous conversations with people at the store and watching how they react. A few weeks ago two young guys were talking to me and it was nice to just enjoy the converstation without the other things.
My girlfriend painted my portrait a few weeks ago and it was interesting to see how I look through her eyes. She said more than anything she wanted to capture my sparking eyes, so no matter what the hair color or how deep the wrinkles, just keep your eyes smiling and the rest will be as it should.
I've always been told that I have laughing/sparkling/flirty eyes. All I know is I'm nearly always in a good mood, laugh and joke a lot and, in general, feel great. About me, life in general and whatever else. lol I talk to a LOT of people every day, in my job, and 99% of them are receptive and have a good time. For the few minutes we deal with one another anyway. I do have a few people who will look for me and go through my register, which is nice. Kinda like the regulars who liked to sit in my station when I was a waitress. It's always nice to be appreciated and liked.
I came across the following quote today and thought it appropriate for this conversation:
"I've made an odd discovery. Every time I talk to a savant I feel quite sure that happiness is no longer a possibility. Yet when I talk with my gardener, I'm convinced of the opposite."
[RIGHT]--Bertrand Russell, British philosopher and mathematician
[/RIGHT]
Love it...thanks for sharing. And something I need to ponder....
I've always been told that I have laughing/sparkling/flirty eyes. All I know is I'm nearly always in a good mood, laugh and joke a lot and, in general, feel great. About me, life in general and whatever else. lol I talk to a LOT of people every day, in my job, and 99% of them are receptive and have a good time. For the few minutes we deal with one another anyway. I do have a few people who will look for me and go through my register, which is nice. Kinda like the regulars who liked to sit in my station when I was a waitress. It's always nice to be appreciated and liked.
A nice Italian man at our local Trader Joes gives me hugs when I go through his check out. What a great break in my daily routine. Heck, we even have the same doc do our colonoscopy.
Also, by keeping it light and happy, for me it avoids getting into someone else's problems, which I can't fix anyway. One of the reasons I married my husband is beause he does make me laugh at myself so I don't take me too seriously anymore. Glad to dump that burden.
A nice Italian man at our local Trader Joes gives me hugs when I go through his check out. What a great break in my daily routine. Heck, we even have the same doc do our colonoscopy.
Also, by keeping it light and happy, for me it avoids getting into someone else's problems, which I can't fix anyway. One of the reasons I married my husband is beause he does make me laugh at myself so I don't take me too seriously anymore. Glad to dump that burden.
Well, none of my customers has resorted to hugs. Oh wait, the other day I got one! The guy who sold me my car last month came in with his wife and HE gave me a hug! lol
I NEVER get involved with anyone else's "problems". If they need someone to talk to I'll be glad to listen and commiserate but that's about it. I don't think I've ever taken myself too seriously. Sometimes I find that life must be one giant cosmic joke. I can find humor in many things, which has probably saved my sanity lo these many years working with the public. I find the "human condition" very humorous sometimes.
Well, none of my customers has resorted to hugs. Oh wait, the other day I got one! The guy who sold me my car last month came in with his wife and HE gave me a hug! lol
I NEVER get involved with anyone else's "problems". If they need someone to talk to I'll be glad to listen and commiserate but that's about it. I don't think I've ever taken myself too seriously. Sometimes I find that life must be one giant cosmic joke. I can find humor in many things, which has probably saved my sanity lo these many years working with the public. I find the "human condition" very humorous sometimes.
It sure helps to laugh at this whole getting old business and the ever crashing stock market today!
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