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Old 02-15-2016, 08:20 PM
 
Location: too far from the sea
20,328 posts, read 19,311,428 times
Reputation: 34750

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Deelighted View Post
Ouch! Big hugs NYgal2NC!! Please don't let all this horrible news bring you down. My cousin, who was only 5 days older than me died from a stroke 2 years ago, but I did my best to not have it make me think that my time was up. Instead, I used it to help me decide that it was time to do the things I wanted to do! Hugs!
That's a constructive way of dealing with loss--to decide that it's time to do the things you want to do. Good for you.

We really have no way of knowing when our time will come. I hate to even think about this subject. But it's scary when a close relative your own age passes away or becomes seriously and incurably ill.

When my dad passed, I could barely cope (on the heels of my mother's death and my two inlaws also)--I coped by looking into my dad's family history. I felt that would honor him and anyway his brother had mentioned at the funeral that he would love to know his own grandfather's name! I realized that if you lose someone, you have to find someone (for me, anyway.) With family history, I found my dad's family--yep, most were dead but that didn't matter and I actually found a few new, living, wonderful relatives. It's a hobby that's helped to fill that hole we are left with when someone passes.

((((HUGS))) to those who have lost someone. I guess that's just about everyone on here by now.
__________________
my posts as moderator will be in red. Moderator: Health&Wellness~Genealogy. The Rules--read here>>> TOS. If someone attacks you, do not reply. Hit REPORT.

 
Old 02-16-2016, 09:29 AM
 
Location: middle tennessee
1,959 posts, read 1,029,782 times
Reputation: 7272
This may be too much information so the squeamish should look away now

I need a shower chair and a hand shower. I don't want to wait until I fall to make the change, but it is unsettling. (I changed "breaking my heart" to "unsettling" ) I hated giving up taking a tub bath and now this. Oh well. I'm going to get myself a fancy set up.

I am sad for those of you experiencing loss. I think it is the hardest part of getting older.
I am a hugger, so I would hug you and say "Bless your heart" ( and mean it) if I could
 
Old 02-16-2016, 04:17 PM
 
Location: Asheville NC
1,661 posts, read 1,352,605 times
Reputation: 4526
Default Walk in tub

Quote:
Originally Posted by newcomputer View Post
This may be too much information so the squeamish should look away now

I need a shower chair and a hand shower. I don't want to wait until I fall to make the change, but it is unsettling. (I changed "breaking my heart" to "unsettling" ) I hated giving up taking a tub bath and now this. Oh well. I'm going to get myself a fancy set up.

I am sad for those of you experiencing loss. I think it is the hardest part of getting older.
I am a hugger, so I would hug you and say "Bless your heart" ( and mean it) if I could
We put a walk in tub in my mom's condo. She loves it. She is 92
 
Old 02-16-2016, 05:04 PM
 
1,645 posts, read 631,336 times
Reputation: 3538
In_newengland - I absolutely agree with you about having someone/something to occupy your time and help you through the grieving process. My mom is in Hospice and doesn't have much longer. I am a person with lots of interests so I can keep myself going. But it will be huge change. I am already poking around in my family's geneology - very interesting. That hhasopened some doors to other organizations - DAR, Mayflower Society, etc.BUt the dues are rather high so I am leaning away from it now. HOpe you all are well, the flu has struck our house.
 
Old 02-16-2016, 06:46 PM
 
Location: University City, Philadelphia
22,607 posts, read 12,486,580 times
Reputation: 15595
Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post

I am one of 18 first cousins on my mothers side alone, the oldest of whom is now 73. Three of us have died, but they were not among the older group. Their deaths occurred in their 30's, 40's, and 50's respectively. The oldest five or six of us are still going strong.
That is something I can relate to.

I suppose most of us expect to outlive our grandparents, our parents, our great-aunts and great-uncles, our aunts and our uncles. When cousins, neighbors, or classmates of our own generation start dying it comes as something of a shock.

Four of my cousins are already gone ... all (except one, born during WW2, my oldest cousin) "Baby Boomers" ... one was a very attractive woman of 64 or 65 who died of recurring breast cancer, another one (a favorite of mine who was a talented musician) who was only 53 or 54 who had lung cancer. Yikes.

On the other hand my mother's mother lived to be 105 (1891 - 1996) and outlived 3 of her 6 children, including my own dear mother of blessed memory.
 
Old 02-17-2016, 08:59 AM
 
Location: Verde Valley AZ
8,766 posts, read 9,841,864 times
Reputation: 11350
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clark Park View Post
That is something I can relate to.

I suppose most of us expect to outlive our grandparents, our parents, our great-aunts and great-uncles, our aunts and our uncles. When cousins, neighbors, or classmates of our own generation start dying it comes as something of a shock.

Four of my cousins are already gone ... all (except one, born during WW2, my oldest cousin) "Baby Boomers" ... one was a very attractive woman of 64 or 65 who died of recurring breast cancer, another one (a favorite of mine who was a talented musician) who was only 53 or 54 who had lung cancer. Yikes.

On the other hand my mother's mother lived to be 105 (1891 - 1996) and outlived 3 of her 6 children, including my own dear mother of blessed memory.

My family has a pretty good history of longevity making it into their late 80s/early 90s and one gr grandmother lived to 104. I have lost four younger cousins over the years and not one of them to any illness. One in a car accident, one was murdered, one of a drug OD and one suicide. I always say that my family either dies old and worn out or young and tragic. I've also lost a son, a niece and a sister, again in unexpected or tragic circumstances. My maternal grandmother outlived three of her seven kids, including my birth mom. Another tragic death in a boating accident.
 
Old 02-17-2016, 04:46 PM
 
Location: too far from the sea
20,328 posts, read 19,311,428 times
Reputation: 34750
Quote:
Originally Posted by AZDesertBrat View Post
My family has a pretty good history of longevity making it into their late 80s/early 90s and one gr grandmother lived to 104. I have lost four younger cousins over the years and not one of them to any illness. One in a car accident, one was murdered, one of a drug OD and one suicide. I always say that my family either dies old and worn out or young and tragic. I've also lost a son, a niece and a sister, again in unexpected or tragic circumstances. My maternal grandmother outlived three of her seven kids, including my birth mom. Another tragic death in a boating accident.
Wow, hugs to you, AZDesertBrat. What a lot of tragic losses you have endured. You must be a strong person to have survived all that.

HollyhockGarden, Yes, genealogy can get expensive. But it's not as bad now as when people used to have to travel all over the country or world to find their ancestors. Ancestry.com is too expensive for me to keep ongoing, but did you know you can subscribe and have a family tree on there--and unsubscribe but still access your tree? I subscribe off an on when I need to. If I ever find a Mayflower ancestor, I guess I would pay the money to belong but DAR and all that, no way. I can't afford to belong to everything. It's a good hobby though and it's like a puzzle that keeps your mind working and occupied. A true blessing it was when my dad died--genealogy took me away both in time and place from the pain.
__________________
my posts as moderator will be in red. Moderator: Health&Wellness~Genealogy. The Rules--read here>>> TOS. If someone attacks you, do not reply. Hit REPORT.
 
Old 02-18-2016, 10:29 AM
 
Location: SW US
2,266 posts, read 2,086,106 times
Reputation: 3935
I started doing genealogy just after my father died too. My Mom was still able to tell me about her relatives, and I also learned things she didn't know, to share with her. I met cousins I did not know about, both in the US and Europe. It surprised me to learn that my father's ancestor came before the Revolution and I could join the DAR, not that I wanted to. It had never been mentioned and I think he had no idea about his ancestors.
I didn't realize I could drop the Ancestry fee and still have my tree there. Thanks for sharing that.
And Family Search has a lot of good, free, genealogy information
 
Old 02-19-2016, 07:13 AM
 
Location: Western Colorado
11,202 posts, read 12,681,779 times
Reputation: 26582
Well yesterday I had sustained winds of 40mph and gusts to 70mph here all day. TV antenna blew off the roof and lost some shingles. Some folks lost power and trees, barns, signs down everywhere around these parts. A wind gust of 148mph was recorded nearby. Like being in a 20 hour long tornado. And this morning, calm, clear and a beautiful sunrise at 25 degrees f. As if mother nature was saying oh sorry about all that.
 
Old 02-19-2016, 08:19 PM
 
Location: Spurs country. "Go, Spurs, Go!"
3,505 posts, read 4,061,633 times
Reputation: 9219
I can tolerate thunder, lightning, blizzards, rain storms, but I am terrified of wind. I got nervous just reading your post! Glad you are all right.
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