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Old 11-23-2015, 03:11 PM
 
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 18,997,544 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by southeastern Regrets View Post
Part of the regrets is that we feel like a fish out of water. we are trying so hard and keep looking forward to get over this, but it just not helping. We both agree that we'll give it one more year, but after that, we will need to do something.
You are in a totally different culture from Philly. Did you buy or are you renting?
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Old 11-23-2015, 03:29 PM
 
3,145 posts, read 1,734,316 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by southeastern Regrets View Post
Part of the regrets is that we feel like a fish out of water. we are trying so hard and keep looking forward to get over this, but it just not helping. We both agree that we'll give it one more year, but after that, we will need to do something.
i have read your posts and i totally get it. my daughter and my grandkids moved to LA a few years ago. we would visit them often when they lived in NYC and i was bereft and missed them terribly. we visited them once and the next time decided we will move to LA. we put our house on the market and looked seriously in LA. I just could not make myself like LA. even the relentless sunshine annoyed me. we almost had a deal on our house back east. luckily it fell through.

i love where we live, the location, even the long cold winters are tolerable. i have no desire to move to any other state. i find it hard to believe people just up and move and are happy. i can see if it is to a lower COL area. we are fortunate that we can afford to live in our house where we are. if anything i would like to move to a condo sometime in our future.
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Old 11-23-2015, 03:44 PM
 
13,973 posts, read 7,441,074 times
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I did my strategic move and downsizing 6 years ago at age 51. I had been living in an extremely high housing cost area, ran the numbers, and realized I couldn't retire there. Fortunately, I telecommute so I can live anywhere as long as it's not stupid-far from an airport. I did the "great circle of life" thing and decided to move back to my home town. It's the devil I know so there is zero risk of figuring out after a few years that I hate it. I'm on salt water with my boat floating in the harbor. I will be spending my retirement time the way I've always spent my leisure time. Sailing. Fishing. Bicycling. Hanging out on the beach. Playing very bad golf. Hanging out with friends. I also own a vacation home at a ski resort and telecommute from there in the winter. My retirement financial planning all revolves around trying to keep both places until I age to the point where I'm unable to ski every day in the winter. At that point, I'll re-assess how I spend my winters.
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Old 11-23-2015, 03:57 PM
 
3,145 posts, read 1,734,316 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffD View Post
I did my strategic move and downsizing 6 years ago at age 51. I had been living in an extremely high housing cost area, ran the numbers, and realized I couldn't retire there. Fortunately, I telecommute so I can live anywhere as long as it's not stupid-far from an airport. I did the "great circle of life" thing and decided to move back to my home town. It's the devil I know so there is zero risk of figuring out after a few years that I hate it. I'm on salt water with my boat floating in the harbor. I will be spending my retirement time the way I've always spent my leisure time. Sailing. Fishing. Bicycling. Hanging out on the beach. Playing very bad golf. Hanging out with friends. I also own a vacation home at a ski resort and telecommute from there in the winter. My retirement financial planning all revolves around trying to keep both places until I age to the point where I'm unable to ski every day in the winter. At that point, I'll re-assess how I spend my winters.
sounds like a plan to me!
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Old 11-23-2015, 08:19 PM
 
18 posts, read 26,352 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RiverBird View Post
You are in a totally different culture from Philly. Did you buy or are you renting?


We bought. I wish we had rented for a year. In fact, we spent 3 months last winter at our daughters. It was great and we were set. I just can not believe we feel this way.
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Old 11-23-2015, 08:22 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cb2008 View Post
sounds like a plan to me!


Well done. I wish I had those options.
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Old 11-24-2015, 07:20 AM
 
18 posts, read 26,352 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cb2008 View Post
i have read your posts and i totally get it. my daughter and my grandkids moved to LA a few years ago. we would visit them often when they lived in NYC and i was bereft and missed them terribly. we visited them once and the next time decided we will move to LA. we put our house on the market and looked seriously in LA. I just could not make myself like LA. even the relentless sunshine annoyed me. we almost had a deal on our house back east. luckily it fell through.

i love where we live, the location, even the long cold winters are tolerable. i have no desire to move to any other state. i find it hard to believe people just up and move and are happy. i can see if it is to a lower COL area. we are fortunate that we can afford to live in our house where we are. if anything i would like to move to a condo sometime in our future.


Thanks for your comments. Our goal is to find away to move back to the Philly area. I do not expect, or want to live in the house size that we had, but I do not want to rent either. Is my financial future lottery tickets? Any suggestions or help?
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Old 11-24-2015, 08:04 AM
 
3,455 posts, read 2,336,523 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Southeast regret View Post
We just made a move to the southeast. We totally regret and wish we had taken more time to analysis. Once you sell, you can never go back and that is the horror of a decision we will always wish we had not.
If you want to move, think, think and think about it before you do anything.
Can you explain a little more why you regret it? Is it the weather, the geography, the people, or what? Also, where did you live before (what general area, if you don't want to be specific)?
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Old 11-24-2015, 10:59 AM
 
18 posts, read 26,352 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LoriNJ View Post
Can you explain a little more why you regret it? Is it the weather, the geography, the people, or what? Also, where did you live before (what general area, if you don't want to be specific)?


I think it is the culture. We have been here for many vacations, one daughter has lived here for 17 years, the second for two. When it comes to day to day living, it is not a vacation. I wish we could go home.
We came from Philadelphia area, Bucks county. Lived there all our lives and now miss it so. Of course, being with the grandchildren is great, but it is a surprise on how we feel.


I would never had thought we would become so homesick. We have started thinking of returning, but we most likely will only be able to rent. The last thing we need is another mistake. Just the thought of forced to stay here for the rest of our lives is depressing. I can not figure out how to reverse this. But from some other blogs, this is the hand we dealt our-selves.


I see a lot of suggestions in this forum and wish we had taken our time more than we did, but on paper, it was a no brainer. Two daughters, five grandchildren, warm weather, lower cost of living. But, it is not home. We acted too quickly and now will regret in leisure.
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Old 11-24-2015, 04:35 PM
 
Location: ☀️ SWFL ⛱ 🌴
2,441 posts, read 1,676,474 times
Reputation: 8726
How long were you retired before you moved? Retiring and moving can both be huge stressors and are definitely major life changes.

We moved when we were thirty and it took two years before I didn't feel lost and out of place. I was working full time and making friends and connections was easy with having a young child. Being retired, you have a lot more time to think about missing your old home which can work against you.

As far as moving back, it may be exactly what you need in the end, or maybe not. We snowbird and I realized I romanticize the northern place while we are in FL. Its amazing how I manage to forget the things I don't like. The same thing happens in reverse. I could slant my opinion on either place by what I decide to focus on.

I'm hoping more time will give you a better grasp on your situation. You sound panicked and very emotional, which is not the time to make any decision. I only know what you've posted here, but it doesn't sound like you need to make any decision right now and can sit back and look at it more calmly later on.

Last edited by jean_ji; 11-24-2015 at 05:23 PM..
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