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Old 02-11-2012, 07:24 PM
Status: "Save a life; carry a gun." (set 8 hours ago)
 
Location: Cody, WY
4,984 posts, read 4,010,524 times
Reputation: 7740

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Quote:
Originally Posted by newenglandgirl View Post
Before giving this poster more suggestions, we need to all think about what she is saying.
She's saying she wants a husband. But she needs to ask herself what she has to offer. She needs to ask herself what she did or didn't do with her previous husband.

She's not going to meet anyone between her living room and kitchen. She'll need to get out and put forth an effort, both physical and mental. If she can't or won't do it she'll remain alone. Life is what it is.

I'm glad my animals give me what I need.
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Old 02-11-2012, 07:31 PM
 
Location: New England
12,250 posts, read 8,395,875 times
Reputation: 8761
Quote:
Originally Posted by Happy in Wyoming View Post
She's saying she wants a husband. But she needs to ask herself what she has to offer. She needs to ask herself what she did or didn't do with her previous husband.

She's not going to meet anyone between her living room and kitchen. She'll need to get out and put forth an effort, both physical and mental. If she can't or won't do it she'll remain alone. Life is what it is.

I'm glad my animals give me what I need.
LOL - where did you read she wants a husband??
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Old 02-11-2012, 07:37 PM
Status: "Save a life; carry a gun." (set 8 hours ago)
 
Location: Cody, WY
4,984 posts, read 4,010,524 times
Reputation: 7740
Quote:
Originally Posted by newenglandgirl View Post
LOL - where did you read she wants a husband??
What else would I read? This is the crux of her post; the rest is window dressing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by artangel View Post
I was married for 33 years when my husband left me for a friend. I've now been alone for close to 9 years. I never expected this....never lived on my own before...was married at 19.

Sometimes I feel like I will die from loneliness. I was always a very loving, affectionate person. Now there's no one to hug, to hold, to touch in any way at all except for my little dog. I do exchange hugs with friends when I get the chance!
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Old 02-11-2012, 07:48 PM
 
Location: Arizona
410 posts, read 384,396 times
Reputation: 777
Quote:
Originally Posted by Happy in Wyoming View Post
She's saying she wants a husband. But she needs to ask herself what she has to offer. She needs to ask herself what she did or didn't do with her previous husband.

She's not going to meet anyone between her living room and kitchen. She'll need to get out and put forth an effort, both physical and mental. If she can't or won't do it she'll remain alone. Life is what it is.

I'm glad my animals give me what I need.
This post is rude, insensitive and disgusting! By the way, from all of your posts you do not sound very happy in Wyoming.
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Old 02-11-2012, 07:53 PM
 
Location: New England
12,250 posts, read 8,395,875 times
Reputation: 8761
Quote:
Originally Posted by Happy in Wyoming View Post
What else would I read? This is the crux of her post; the rest is window dressing.
There are many ways to have meaningful contact with people without getting married..... friends, kids and grandkids, an affair would all fill the bill. She is not asking for anyone's judgment, she is asking for caring suggestions.
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Old 02-11-2012, 07:54 PM
 
45 posts, read 32,980 times
Reputation: 74
artangel, your post touched me. I'm so sorry about your situation. I've been a widow for many years, so I can relate somewhat. I wish you the best.

newenglandgirl, the system won't let me add to your reputation. Otherwise, I would.
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Old 02-11-2012, 07:58 PM
Status: "Save a life; carry a gun." (set 8 hours ago)
 
Location: Cody, WY
4,984 posts, read 4,010,524 times
Reputation: 7740
Quote:
Originally Posted by SCBaker View Post
This post is rude, insensitive and disgusting! By the way, from all of your posts you do not sound very happy in Wyoming.
Well then, enlighten us in your sensitive and caring manner. Tell this woman how she can find what she seeks. Please be specific. She's looking for an answer.
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Old 02-11-2012, 08:02 PM
 
543 posts, read 340,456 times
Reputation: 875
thank you so much for your kindness and caring! I want to reply to specifics and will do so later. Having problems momentarilly, but will most definitely post again soon!!!!

Thanks for understanding...most especially New England Girl.

Will plan to post later tonight. Thanks.
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Old 02-11-2012, 08:58 PM
 
Location: Arizona
410 posts, read 384,396 times
Reputation: 777
Quote:
Originally Posted by newenglandgirl View Post
I feel like I'm the only one who has read the OP's post carefully.

1. She is in physical pain. That means hard to move around or even go outside. Depression is not physical pain.

PAIN means that taking care of more dogs and emptying cat litter boxes is not going to be easy. If she can do that, she can get out to meet people. She cannot do that, she is largely confined to home.

2. She wants human contact, not more animals or volunteer work to do all alone at home!

Before giving this poster more suggestions, we need to all think about what she is saying.
You are correct on all points. In addition, the OP stated that she has a little dog.

Artangel, if I remember correctly, I think you bought a house in a development in Maricopa, AZ or another far Eastern suburb of Phoenix. IMO, that is part of the problem. Usually, younger people with jobs & kids live in those developments and they are too busy with everyday life and are not interested in making friends. Those homes also have tall block walls surrounding the back yards and people pull into their garages to never be seen again until they back out of their driveways. They may wave to you but often times they will not bother.

On another thread awhile back, I suggested that you consider a retirement community. You stated that you were not too interested in those communities because many homes did not have garages. Actually, most or many of the homes do have garages. Maybe you should take a closer look at them in the future. There are a lot of retirement communities around the Phoenix area. But, they are not all created equal. Need to find one that fits your budget & personality.

I am in the process of purchasing a small duplex, with a garage in the original Sun City development. Sun City is huge. There are 43,000 people and it stretches for 13 miles. Too big to be cliquish. I chose a location that is very close to stores and the 2 rec. centers that have many activities that interest me. I just might buy a golf cart but not sure it will fit in my garage along with the car.

For me, buying in Sun City was the sensible thing to do. As I age with degenerative disc disease, I felt that I needed to be in a location where support services were readily available and stimulating activities very close at hand.

In the next several days, I will be posting the experience of my recent visit to Sun City on the Women retiring alone..... thread.

Keep the faith. It will get better.
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Old 02-11-2012, 10:05 PM
 
Location: University City, Philadelphia
15,679 posts, read 4,846,181 times
Reputation: 9307
Loneliness is something that many of us have to deal with.

When I decided to rent rooms out on the third floor of my Victorian house I did it for financial reasons: I had a mortgage, but it was doing the repairs and restoration work on the house that cost a lot of $$$ ... and who ever heard of a single guy living in a three story house with 6 bedrooms by himself? Anyway, more than extra dough coming from my housemates/tenants I discovered having people in the house was very pleasant and agreeable to me. It's sorta like the male version of "The Golden Girls."

It may sound very unappealing at first, but if any of you are single would you consider moving in a larger place with a roommate or housemate? If you really interview the person, check their references ... you might be lucky and find not only a great roommie but a good friend as well.
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