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Old 01-19-2015, 10:36 AM
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
22,676 posts, read 40,039,994 times
Reputation: 23825


Originally Posted by Flamingo13 View Post
I'm not retirement age (mid 50's)... much of this thread is speaking of "us" and I was widowed in the last yr. - otherwise.... trying to be "you gotta do what you gotta do"
Sorry to hear of your loss, most on this thread are not an "us", and many more do not have very collaborative help in: "Men and Women retiring alone to a new city/state". All of the "us" will be one, unless they go together (quite rare, but happens).

In many ways, it is so much easier to make this choice solo, but also is thought to be more risky to pull it off +/-. (I don't believe that part, I like the adventure of new places and relationships). Stability is not a core need of mine.

I know far too many retirees and married who split over a move decision to take this lightly.

It is probable that you are in a good spot to make a positive change, if not forever, at least for a new chapter of learning.

Your list of 'Cheaper than Alex, VA' will be pretty exhaustive

Add some key wishes to your list, and you will get lots of insight from this group.

As an example of what I thought about... here is my 'short list' ... (I really wanted it to be Powell, WY, but it was not to be) (I have the WY Pioneer Home in Thermopolis on my 'family directive' ("Stick me in Thermopolis" ($1600/ month care home within the Hot Springs State Park!)

Where to retire for SR: (I found it in SW WA (cool / ideal summers) and in Hill Country, TX (moderate and sunny winter with lots of events / scenery))
  • <$100k for acreage,
  • <1hr to international airport,
  • < 20 min to Community college / good libraries
  • < 10 min to groceries, supplies (GOOD hardware / tools), and fuel,
  • separate living space for kids, parent, caregiver,
  • Rural,
  • barn,
  • shop
  • 2bd 2 bath
  • quiet,
  • lots of wildlife
  • Friendly,
  • safe
  • pretty region (destination travel)
  • excellent view from home
  • close recreation
  • desirable spot (for ez resale)
  • hiking
  • biking

BTW... forgot to add my Cost of Living benchmarks.

I eat CHEAP ($100/ month) so need affordable and available veggies (<$0.50/#)
good growing season
cheap power and heat ($100/ month max). I use passive solar and moderate climates (20F - 80F)
Available used / bulk veggie oil for fuel for my car.
HS Internet is a high want (Faster than dial-up (Current))
Ethnic region and foods / culture events

Last edited by StealthRabbit; 01-19-2015 at 11:08 AM..

Old 01-19-2015, 02:02 PM
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 19,001,270 times
Reputation: 15649
Originally Posted by bridgerider View Post
I'm flip-flopping more than a fish out of water. One day I'm sure I've settled on Connecticut; the next day I'm back to being SURE it will be NC. And so it goes. At least I finally whittled it down to those two. I think.
Connecticut? What is of interest to you in that state?
Old 01-19-2015, 02:05 PM
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 19,001,270 times
Reputation: 15649
Originally Posted by popcorn247 View Post
Where is Indiana on your lists?
Popcorn, now that you're retired, have you been back to Indiana for a visit? Seems like a good choice from what I hear.
Old 01-19-2015, 02:13 PM
2,628 posts, read 4,959,273 times
Reputation: 2225
Originally Posted by newenglandgirl View Post
Popcorn, now that you're retired, have you been back to Indiana for a visit? Seems like a good choice from what I hear.
Since retiring in Nov., I've been working in my yard and cleaning up my house I plan on some traveling this spring and summer.
Old 01-19-2015, 06:12 PM
Location: Alexandria, VA
11,419 posts, read 20,299,331 times
Reputation: 16495
SR - thank you so much! That was very well thought out.

I'll try:

Housing: Ideally, I could afford a smaller crafstsman style house (LOVE that style), or a townhouse maybe (can't imagine apt. living, too many ifs in terms of neighbors, noise, etc. - plus I want to paint whatever color I feel like, put holes on the walls for art, etc.)

Shopping: Spoiled by that here, I have 4 large grocery chains (w/multiple locations, all w/i 5-15 or 20 mins.), multiple CVS and Rite Aids, multiple Marshalls, TJMaxx, Ross, HomeGoods, WorldMarket, DSW, Macy's, etc.

Restaurants: Again, many chains such as Ruby Tuesday, TGIF, Panera, etc. - not into fast food places (except when traveling for bathroom stops, LOL)

Environment: can't be in the middle of nowhere, physically can't do alot of home upkeep but a small garden, plantings, etc. would be ideal. Prefer to NOT have neighbors like the previous next door house renters who BLASTED rap music so my walls rattled).

I also really like to be able to open windows for fresh air (but don't want to be scared!) - main floor b/r here (only slept in when it's super hot because upstairs gets hot in summer) - can open windows over the bed because they are pretty small - otherwise, b/r upstairs I feel safe having window cracked year-round.

A deck or patio would be wonderful.

Travel: I'm not a flyer although if I moved somewhere further from Mom (and she's not getting younger) and had to get back to her, would prob. have to fly. I'm also spoiled by Metro here, I can walk to a bus stop in under 10 mins. and take that to a Metro stop after a 15 min. or so ride. Old Town also has a free trolley that I could hop on from the Metro stop and spend the entire day in Old Town if I want. Mountains aren't a far drive, lakes and rivers abound.

Love to eat at outside restaurants and people watch, also like going to yard sales, estate sales, antique/collectible shops, etc. and looking around.

I honestly can't figure out an exact budget as I'm not sure what the house would sell for, how much I would clear, etc.

Hope this is more info.

Good luck to all that are looking into relocation!
Old 01-20-2015, 05:35 AM
1,219 posts, read 1,032,306 times
Reputation: 1997
Originally Posted by newenglandgirl View Post
Connecticut? What is of interest to you in that state?

I get that question a lot, heheh! Most people I talk with (& read their feedback in forums) that do not like CT cite the traffic congestion & limited multi-lane roadways as their main reason for dislike. I figure if I'm retired, what's the rush? And those that do like it seem to have many of the same reasons I have. I grew up in Colorado & loved it. I appreciate it even more now that I only visit several times a year. But I don't love it "enough". The winters are beautiful.... if you can live in the mountains & take advantage of the activities. Otherwise, for me, winter is a waiting game.

Ever since I was a little kid, I've been drawn to New England. My father used to bring home those calendars gas stations gave out -- the ones that had picturesque towns & villages of New England featured in September and October. I know that sounds nuts, but those photos stayed in the back of my mind for decades. When I moved to NY in the 80's, I lived in Dutchess County & often assisted my mother-in-law with her antique business. That took her often to the small towns in the western half of CT. I was in love from that point on. All these years later, I do freelance floral work & spend a good amount of time t/o the entire state. Sure there's congestion in the Hartford area, but that's the case with any city.

I like the thought of being close to NYC & Boston when I need a dose of city life. But I am hooked on alll the small towns that have retained their old charm. I still like having four seasons & the winters in CT are just enough of a decrease in severity compared to the capital region of NY where I am now --- BRUTAL.

Another region I'm in love with is the Shenandoah/Blue Ridge area, & have found that the triangle of NC (Raleigh/Durham/Chapel Hill) is close enough to the mountains, but also close enough to the ocean. It's more affordable than CT & still has winter (by their definition, not mine haha!). Both that area of NC and the areas I'm looking at in CT can offer me the small town feel I love without the isolation. I have friends in NC & CT, so I wouldn't be completely alone; &I love road trips so seeing friends & family who currently are in six states shouldn't be a problem.

I'm in my mid fifties too, & my retirement age is now realistically going to be 70 or older. I'm not opposed to moving before retirement, and yes I'm nervous about the whole thing. But the more people I meet who are doing just fine alone as they age, sure does give me hope. I was widowed fairly early (age 45) with no kids, and can't believe how long & strange my last ten years have been. Sometimes I think having a plan is useless... God is always throwing me curve balls... may as well duck or learn to catch with both hands.
Old 01-20-2015, 05:42 AM
1,219 posts, read 1,032,306 times
Reputation: 1997
Nice post Flamingo13. Reminds me why VA was on my list. I finally knocked it off the list when I accepted the fact that my income will never support the places in VA I'd want to live. Good luck to you!
Old 01-20-2015, 06:55 AM
Location: Colorado
1,968 posts, read 1,986,663 times
Reputation: 1724
CT is a beautiful state, have spent time in Milford especially, not too far from NYC which is great. I could definitely see myself back there some time in the next ten years, but would want a small condo in FL also. I would rather be too hot than too cold.
Old 01-21-2015, 11:31 PM
Location: Cochise county, AZ
4,985 posts, read 3,473,663 times
Reputation: 10523
Bridge -why did you cross VA off your list? My nephew lives in Portsmouth & has for many years. Just email ed him for info as Virginia wasn't on my list.

Old 01-21-2015, 11:34 PM
Location: too far from the sea
19,901 posts, read 18,907,505 times
Reputation: 33831
I thought of moving to CT but my husband's lawyer stole his retirement money so now we're stuck.

I would have moved to the CT shore. I used to live close enough so that I could get to the beach in about 15 minutes. Saybrook area would be nice. I like the small towns and ideally, if I were very rich, I would probably choose some place like Essex, CT. Those shore towns like Branford and the others have always held an attraction for me. They have their charm and you can get a train to NYC. The coastal area has an easier winter than MA.

FF County is too much like NYC though. It's very expensive anyway.
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