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Old 08-30-2015, 05:30 PM
 
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 18,991,724 times
Reputation: 15649

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Quote:
Originally Posted by PhxBarb View Post
Yes, Autumn, I agree with you. I just drive a half hour out of Phoenix and I think I am in Saudi Arabia. So much desert and so little civilization. I am not a camper anyway. Girl Scout camp did me in one summer in Wisconsin. Never again. But some of us are definitely less fearful than others !!
Fear can serve us in terms of taking all kinds of sensible precautions. Fearlessness can be good, but it can also engender naiveté.

 
Old 08-31-2015, 01:21 AM
 
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
226 posts, read 205,325 times
Reputation: 327
Quote:
Originally Posted by loveautumn View Post
Don't want to rain on anyone's parade, but I've driven across country 3 times by myself, including NM and AZ and there is no way I would camp anywhere by myself. The route is very desolate for very long stretches (probably without cell coverage) so you will need to make sure you have supplies with you, water, food, and some sort of crime protection, fill up with gas wherever you see a gas station because you will go many miles without seeing one. Also please make sure your car has been checked out before you leave. My car almost broke down on one trip and I got so ripped off but had no choice. It's beautiful but very rough country, as I said, very isolated and can be kind of scary. And it is very close to the Mexican border so that in itself can be dangerous. I would seriously recommend staying at a motel 6 or someplace similar, if for no other reason that you can shower and get a good night's rest. the towns you are stopping at must be very small, are you considering moving to one of those? As I recall, I was very happy when I arrived in Albuquerque and back in civilization. I'm just worried about you. As an afterthought, Prescott is a pretty great place to live.
I have to agree with you - it would seem to be asking for trouble I don't need - too risky - even if nothing bad happened it would be hard to relax knowing the risks involved. Why tempt fate? I did drive it a couple of times by myself but not camping. And the proximity to the border should give pause - it is a dangerous place especially now so why put yourself in it.
 
Old 08-31-2015, 01:27 AM
 
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
226 posts, read 205,325 times
Reputation: 327
Quote:
Originally Posted by popcorn247 View Post
Tornados are not such a threat in Florida but hurricanes are! I was living in one and had it totally destroyed in Hurricane Andrew!
Well you survived, thankfully - were you there when it was destroyed or did you leave and come back to find it destroyed? Andrew - when was that? I remember reading about the one people chose to stick around - had an ill-advised hurricane party and most of them did not survive. It must be awful to be stuck in a bad place realizing you really screwed up.
 
Old 08-31-2015, 01:38 AM
 
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
226 posts, read 205,325 times
Reputation: 327
Quote:
Originally Posted by Giesela View Post
I relate to so much of this. I never seemed to figure out all those things other people did - like go on adventures and experience different things when you are young that's when you make mistakes and its ok, thats how you figure yourself out. I actually joined the service to see places and then got sent the dullest place. Got out. Other people who never even cared went. I could go on, seems like people who could care less about the kinds of things I want so bad have been there done that.
All my friends got married, had kids, got divorced, got married again. I couldn't seem to make it happen after a disasterous relationship. You really get pushed out of the mainstream of relationships then if you are not paired up. I think most people in that situation rely on family but I didn't have any.

So now I realize that where ever I go - I am there. A specific place is not going to solve my problems with connecting. I will still want to stay home and read too much. I will still be viewed suspiciously as potential friend material because I never married and had kids.

I really want some good easy friends. Like high school friends. Everyone is so busy. I guess I'm not I suspect I might be a little boring?

But......if I am going to continue with the struggle of connecting I figure I might as well do it somewhere pretty. Or at least prettier. So I'm not staying here.

You gotta keep trying right?

I appreciate the note about NW Arkansas. I think the milder winters there would be a boon long term. But I feel like if I'm going to move entirely out of my comfort zone (i.e. have never been there) I want it to be somewhere with something a little bigger, mtns, coast. Which leaves me with my current pick. Home state so at least I am familiar with the general location, cold hard winters a negative. I'm thinking Traverse City MI. 6 months are really nice.
Wow, I guess there's something for everybody. To each his own and all but Travers City Michigan would be way down on the list of desirable places for me. yeah I think I'm probably a little boring too - but there is something to be said for boring. And anyway, I now realize and accept that it's far better to be alone than with the wrong person. I've known a few people who seemed to feel that SOMEBODY was better than nobody.

I vowed to myself several years ago that I wasn't moving any further north than I am currently but I "met" online a few guys who sounded interesting and they all lived, wouldn't you know - north. Not that it would have worked but anyway - yes there are some people who just seem to go with the flow and amazingly it works. If there's a gene for that, I don't have it! It does seem that times are different now, everyone is busy life moves faster and at this stage of the game its hard to find a fit. Anyway, best of luck whatever you decide.
 
Old 08-31-2015, 01:50 AM
 
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
226 posts, read 205,325 times
Reputation: 327
Quote:
Originally Posted by popcorn247 View Post
I can totally relate to your situation. I, too, am single, never married, no children. I've been living and working in south Florida for 40+ years. I am so eager to move out of this crazy, touristy, chaotic, corrupt area. I truly miss the four seasons. I grew up in the Midwest and am considering a move back up there now that I am retired. I have had a really hard time fitting in and finding other people who share my interests. I enjoy hiking, botanizing, gardening, my dogs and going on road trips. I am interested in geology, rocks, etc. I would love to spend more time out West.

So many people I know are married, busy with their families, etc. and they don't have much time for anything else. I would love to go traveling with a friend, etc. I, too, had a bad relationship and another one in which we shared little in the way of common interests.

I am not weird or anything, I just have never married. I am free to move anywhere, but I need to downsize and make sure that I live in a relatively low COL area. Decisions, decisions....I feel almost paralyzed about deciding where I would like to live. I will need to sell my home - the only one I have ever owned and all the hassles that go along with this.

Reading what you've written I couldn't help but think about the old "grass is greener" thing. You want to get back to the four seasons, I want to escape it. Too bad there isn't some kind of way where you just find someone to switch places with and "presto" you're there. Sort of like Star Trek - "beam me up" yannow? If they can send someone to the moon that doesn't seem like too much to ask!
 
Old 08-31-2015, 02:11 AM
 
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
226 posts, read 205,325 times
Reputation: 327
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYgal2NC View Post
Sounds like you have hit some rough times. If you read enough posts here, you will note that you have plenty of company. My own particular money problem stems from over-use of credit cards. If I only knew then what I know now...........

I know a couple of people in the senior income-based rent apartments where I live. I noted how much "extra" money they have. But then I think to myself, I have a car and they don't. I have some other things that they don't. If I didn't have a car to maintain, put gas into, pay for insurance for, etc. I would have a lot more money, too. But truthfully, I would never want to lose my car. It's way too important for me.

Just my own personal experience. We are all different.

Good luck.
Good luck to you as well - yes money is a balancing act. Honestly, credit card debt was a problem for me too in addition to the housing market thing. Life goes backward - as a baby getting your first tooth - as an older person losing your teeth - I have managed so far to hang on to mine. There's some kind of a mental hurdle, imo, having to get false ones. Thing is babies with no teeth are pretty cute, older ladies without teeth are not in the same cute category.

I think I could do without a car, that's the way I grew up in a small town where you could walk pretty much everywhere not that it was always fun in the winter. There are so many places now where if you don't have a car you are at a really big disadvantage getting anywhere.

I wouldn't mind really living in the middle of nowhere if I knew a few people and could walk wherever I needed to be. But I think I might be deceiving myself. Living in a small town I was born into and grew up in is probably totally different from moving into one where I'd know no one. I think I'm naive in some ways - I think about shows like Mayberry with Andy Griffith and Alice living in Phoenix - they all seemed happy I HAVE TO REMIND MYSELF THAT WAS FICTION, thing is I like believing in fairy tales. But a fairy tale that didn't quite pan out would be a nightmare yannow? On the one hand I'm a grown mature woman who's supposed to have common sense but there's still a part of me that's a bit of a dreamer. My dad did that for some time before getting married. After coming back from the war he and a buddy drifted from town to town, here and there for a while but life was easier then. He talked about getting off the train at 1st & Spring Street in L.A. in the morning and both of them having a job in the afternoon as street car conductors. That doesn't happen anymore!
 
Old 08-31-2015, 09:24 AM
 
4,490 posts, read 4,749,659 times
Reputation: 9957
Quote:
Originally Posted by RiverBird View Post
Fear can serve us in terms of taking all kinds of sensible precautions. Fearlessness can be good, but it can also engender naiveté.

need I say more...


 
Old 08-31-2015, 09:36 AM
 
2,627 posts, read 4,956,557 times
Reputation: 2225
Quote:
Originally Posted by AmericnGrl View Post
Reading what you've written I couldn't help but think about the old "grass is greener" thing. You want to get back to the four seasons, I want to escape it. Too bad there isn't some kind of way where you just find someone to switch places with and "presto" you're there. Sort of like Star Trek - "beam me up" yannow? If they can send someone to the moon that doesn't seem like too much to ask!
Oh how I wish that this could happen! Just exchange homes!
 
Old 09-01-2015, 11:36 AM
 
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
22,644 posts, read 40,010,157 times
Reputation: 23801
Quote:
Originally Posted by popcorn247 View Post
Oh how I wish that this could happen! Just exchange homes!
Sometimes happens within 'hospitality groups'.
Hospitality exchange - Wikitravel

More frequent is house sitting / pet sitting / plant sitting..

I am leaving for 6 months - 1 yr. and will be looking for such.. I have a 'tenant' in my 2000sf daylight basement 'view' apartment, but they travel a lot too.

My SIL found a wonderful view basement apartment in Seattle home of older couple. ($300/ month). 4 of my neighbors have guest houses or 'shop' with apartment.

Lots of opportunities!
 
Old 09-01-2015, 12:52 PM
 
Location: Central NY
4,685 posts, read 3,254,622 times
Reputation: 12002
Quote:
Originally Posted by AmericnGrl View Post
Good luck to you as well - yes money is a balancing act. Honestly, credit card debt was a problem for me too in addition to the housing market thing. Life goes backward - as a baby getting your first tooth - as an older person losing your teeth - I have managed so far to hang on to mine. There's some kind of a mental hurdle, imo, having to get false ones. Thing is babies with no teeth are pretty cute, older ladies without teeth are not in the same cute category.

I think I could do without a car, that's the way I grew up in a small town where you could walk pretty much everywhere not that it was always fun in the winter. There are so many places now where if you don't have a car you are at a really big disadvantage getting anywhere.

I wouldn't mind really living in the middle of nowhere if I knew a few people and could walk wherever I needed to be. But I think I might be deceiving myself. Living in a small town I was born into and grew up in is probably totally different from moving into one where I'd know no one. I think I'm naive in some ways - I think about shows like Mayberry with Andy Griffith and Alice living in Phoenix - they all seemed happy I HAVE TO REMIND MYSELF THAT WAS FICTION, thing is I like believing in fairy tales. But a fairy tale that didn't quite pan out would be a nightmare yannow? On the one hand I'm a grown mature woman who's supposed to have common sense but there's still a part of me that's a bit of a dreamer. My dad did that for some time before getting married. After coming back from the war he and a buddy drifted from town to town, here and there for a while but life was easier then. He talked about getting off the train at 1st & Spring Street in L.A. in the morning and both of them having a job in the afternoon as street car conductors. That doesn't happen anymore!
Today is just one of those days when I've had too much time to ruminate. In my younger days I used to dream of moving to VA Beach, live in a small place, work at a women's shop (jewelry, clothes, etc.) and be content with doing that and walking the beach. Whenever I get into the kind of funk I am in today, that dream comes back to me. How I wish I could get past the fear of doing it. Having enough money to do it. At one time earlier this year I was planning to move to Winston-Salem, NC and talked about it a lot on these threads. So many excellent suggestions were made But didn't have enough faith in myself that I could make it work. I'm 73, have some health issues to deal with, and think at least for now I'll stick where I am, central NY state. I can be a loner. I know enough what to do when that becomes too much and I need to see people. A friend said I should get out each day if for nothing else a cup of coffee somewhere. Good advice but I don't follow it much.
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