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Old 08-05-2013, 11:37 AM
 
Location: Florida
23,165 posts, read 26,122,269 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newenglandgirl View Post
One thing I'm curious about is pets in 55+ places. Do they generally accept them—only one dog, more than one, and any size limit? Of course the lawns are probably chemically treated so you can't let your dog on the grass, and that means walking them outside the community even later at night. What is your community like in this respect?
In ours, 2 dogs is the official limit (some people have 3) and there is no size limit.
A lot of people chose this park because of the pet policy so most....certainly not all.....are tolerant of the occasional 'scorch marks' and most never fail to 'scoop'.
We own our land and lawn care is up to each owner so chemicals are 'here' but not 'there'.
There are those few that want lush "northern " lawns even if they are now living in a very dry area
Most walk their dogs on the streets and don't let them go up onto any lawns and give the the lush lawns a respectful wide berth.
There are also enough native unmanicured areas so that intruding on someones lawn isn't necessary(without leaving the park).
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Old 08-05-2013, 11:50 AM
 
Location: California
6,420 posts, read 7,639,289 times
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Some people are introverts, others extroverts so before making decisions about where to live I think it is important to know yourself first. At times, I need to have others around, at other times, I prefer my cat's company. I also agree with those who say to read the rules before moving in, and would like to add, check out the financial health as well.

I do volunteer work at our library with many older folks and it is now starting to bother me that about the time I get close to them as a friend, their health takes a turn for the worse. That may sound selfish, but for me, I need a mix of friends from different ages as it is painful to lose so many in a short time span.

We live in a condo and the financial risk for all the buildings is something I no longer what to assume. As the complex gets older, the higher the maintenance costs so we are ready to move on to our own little home where I can hang purple curtains, if I chose! Enough of the selectively enforced rules.
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Old 08-05-2013, 11:52 AM
 
Location: Oxygen Ln. AZ
9,319 posts, read 18,717,568 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newenglandgirl View Post
Many of us who say we would never live in a 55+ community have never lived in one. We only imagine what we read or hear from others. I think there's a fit for everyone. For the OP, she unfortunately made the wrong choice for the long run but has hopefully gained something by the experience. I think it would be great if some of these places had one-month rental units for seniors to try out. In a month's time you can pretty well judge whether a place is for you or not. With couples, it gets complicated, as couples are individuals. My SO would not make it in a 55+ community or even a condo or apartment. He's the rugged outdoor type and needs his little piece of land. If we wind up in a condo/rental in old age it would have to be near a community garden so he can dig his patch.
You are right regarding renting for a bit before making the leap. Many, if not all of the 55 developments here do have rentals available either short term or on a yearly basis. We happened to have had the opportunity to do remodel plans for several residents here and slowly just fell in love with this quirky place. We met the soon to be new neighbors moving into a rental behind our property and they have a 3 year lease to test the water....a very wise move.
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Old 08-05-2013, 12:36 PM
 
28,803 posts, read 47,593,875 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ipoetry View Post
Too many rules, sheeple that walk down the street amassed like zombies toward their 10 o'clock water aerobics class or 11 o'clock bridge game, did I say too many rules? No diving or jumping into the pool, little girls' hair must be braided so as not to clog up the pool filter, etc., etc. No outside sneakers on the treadmills, just clean brand new sneakers so as not to guck up the equipment.

We've found a nearby neighborhood; small back yards insure there are no pools, no german shepherds, and we're thinking of making the change toward freedom. We figure coffins are much too confining, why settle for the restrictions now when we should be raising hell?
It's a shame you ended up in a place like that. We have spent time in two 55+ communities, both Del Webb built, one has been handed over to the community, the other will be in a couple of years, I think.

Neither one was like that. If they were we would never have considered the move. But we've decided to stay put for a few more years. We'll look into into it again in a few.
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Old 08-05-2013, 12:46 PM
 
Location: Virginia
18,717 posts, read 31,018,324 times
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OP tried something and decided it wasn't the right fit. No biggie, IMO. In fact, I'm looking forward to hearing how everything works out. Your experience might finally help to resolve a long standing question on this forum.

For years we've been debating the pros and cons of 55+ communities and I can't tell you how many times I've seen posts like "The biggest reason to not buy in a 55+ is you won't be able to re-sell if you should change your mind." Now we'll have a chance to find out if this is really true or not. I'll be most interested to see how well it goes (hopefully smoothly).

Last edited by Caladium; 08-05-2013 at 01:19 PM.. Reason: Split into two posts
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Old 08-05-2013, 12:48 PM
 
Location: Virginia
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Regarding a few of the other questions in this thread, here are some things I learned after visiting about 12 different communities (and knowing people at Hot Springs Village, AR). Granted, this is a tiny percentage of the 55+ communities in the US, so YMMV--but it might be helpful never the less.

Renting for a Trial Run:
All the 55+ communities I visited had ways a prospective buyer could rent there. Sometimes the association has rental units, sometimes individual residents who have a place for sale will let you rent it for 6 months (or maybe even a shorter period, if you ask). Of course, the communities we looked at tended to be the larger ones. Not sure if smaller communities do this.

Pets:
Almost all the communities we looked at allowed multiple pets. As I recall 3-5 was typical, with no size limitations. It's worth noting these were communities that were mostly SFH's. I would guess apartment communities would have more restrictions.

Kids in the Pools/Gym:
Most of the communities we visited were pretty big and had more than 1 pool. Often the "main" pool was for seniors only. Visiting grandkids were allowed to use a specific pool, or sometimes 2-3 if it was a large community. The same applied to some of the gyms--if a community had more than one, then at least one gym would be designated "seniors only."

Younger Residents vs. Residents Age 75+:
Although I like to think that I enjoy having friends of all ages at the senior center, when it comes to a neighborhood I must admit I enjoyed the communities that had residents who were in the 55-65 age range much more than I enjoyed the ones that seemed to be mostly 75+. There were two places we visited where everyone seemed to be over 75. One we liked, and the people there seemed friendly--but we would never buy there because, a friendly as they were, we wondered if we would really make friends. At the other, the atmosphere was so cliquey and unfriendly we couldn't wait to leave. We got the impression they had all been together for years and didn't want to have "intruders" in their club, especially people our age. There were some people who really didn't seem thrilled to see my husband and I when we walked through the clubhouse. We were glad to leave the place.

In addition to being uncomfortable, consider the financial implications of a community if they can't attract younger seniors. Like it or not, the younger seniors are the future buyers. Those communities that are all 75+ have my sympathy, but at the same time I think they would do well to start adding a few activities that would be things the next generation likes (as well as continuing the things they already do). In other words, add tai chi classes or maybe host a whole food farmers market once a month, while still making plenty of time for big band concerts and the other activities the older crowd likes.

Interesting Observation from my friend in Hot Springs Village Regarding Age Differences:
HSV, like many 55+ communities, was built in the 70s and 80s by members of the "Greatest Generation." Now they are seeing the next generation move in, and some of the old timers are not happy about sharing "their" community with their kids.

My friend told me an example of a recent "generation clash" that I find thought-provoking. Not sure if this was an unusual situation or if this sort of thing happens in other 55+ communities, but FWIW, here's the story. Apparently HSV got an opportunity to book Beatlemania in the community theater. And the subsequent "blowup" that occurred was a real example of how the older generation may have a hard time with having their kids move in. Supposedly the band offered HSV a really good deal because they had family members in HSV, and they were going to be in the area anyway and between bookings. Initially there was some excitement about having something new and different at the theater, which usually has big band music or choirs. But then a group of old-timers got very upset about the whole idea of "having that hippie music in the Village" and so they cancelled it. They would rather have the hall be empty and not rented rather than have "those people" holding a concert. I'm not sure what I make of this story (and also not sure if I heard all sides of the story or even how accurate my friend's version of this story may be), but as I said earlier I find it thought-provoking.

Having said that, I generally had a very good impression of the 55+ communities we visited. The people I know who live in them seem to be happy. They work really well for people who like a quiet community, or people who want lots of activities and like to socialize with other residents their age.

Last edited by Caladium; 08-05-2013 at 01:34 PM..
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Old 08-05-2013, 01:09 PM
 
28,803 posts, read 47,593,875 times
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Wow! Great post.

We have visited just two 55+ and would agree with your observations. The two we visited gave no indications of ageism - or is that reverse ageism? We were warmly welcomed at both.
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Old 08-05-2013, 01:25 PM
 
Location: Hudson Vally/Suncoast
129 posts, read 236,660 times
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I've enjoyed being at my MIL's 55+. It's small, everyone knows each other, they have a dog park and it's very well maintained. It became resident owned when it was going to be sold 10 years ago. It's a good community.

As nice as it is, it is 55+. That means everyone is getting older all the time and the down side to this is seeing many people become ill or die. Or if they snowbird they no longer are able to come in the winter. Health is a big topic of conversation. It can be depressing. There is a large group of single women whose husbands have died. It's sad to see so many of them, but good they have a built in support group already in place. There's always pluses and minuses.

For me, I'll take a mix of ages: babies, young children, teenagers, young parents along with middle aged and old folks.

The other thread on here is about looking in the mirror and seeing an old person. Living in a 55+ would seem to be a reminder of this every single day, without any relief. If living in one were part of being a snowbird it may work if the other home was in a mixed community, so there would be some variety.
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Old 08-05-2013, 01:37 PM
 
11,558 posts, read 12,023,335 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Minervah View Post
Here is my question. Didn't the OP read the rules before moving into the community? These are the rules and I am certain that those who did read them weren't bothered by them and so moved in. I think it is a bit unkind to call people "zombies" just because they make a choice to join in the activities and the way they walk to get there. Attending community meals can be a very nice social event for some especially those who do not or no longer have partners with whom to share their lives.

I would wager no one forces the inhabitants of the community to do any of these things so why should it bother someone who opts out if others choose to participate? The non-participants can always close their drapes and not watch the "zombies" march by or better yet, go and engage in other activities outside the community that suit them better.

And little girls are asked to braid their hair in order not to clog the filters of the swimming pool. I like that idea better than those uncomfortable bathing caps many pools require long haired little girls to wear.

I don't think these rules are out of line. I don't know whether or not I would be able to live with them but I wouldn't criticize those who do. I don't think it's a matter of age either. Some people like to live more organized lives than others and some, as I mentioned before, might like the group atmosphere because they are alone.

Whatever floats your boat.
Great reply!
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Old 08-05-2013, 01:40 PM
 
4,423 posts, read 7,350,321 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BucFan View Post
restrictions aren't all bad - make your move. Once in your new neighborhood, you might recognize that neighborhoods without rules could be much worse.
The move will be our 10th house. We've moved around a lot for my husband's career.

But back to 55-plus 'hoods, we've owned 4 condos and one single family in a gated development, all with rules. The rest were single family homes in neighborhoods. We're no stranger to rules though we've never had social criteria before. I attended a few Ladies' Coffees and I found myself watching the clock, I thought I'd fall asleep from the shallowness.

I'm a 'girlfriend' friend. I like one-on-one, deep conversations. I just came back from lunch with an old friend and it was really meaningful and rewarding. I'm not trying to dump on the lifestyle, if it's what someone wants then they should go for it. I just find that conversations at a table for 10 aren't very satisfying.
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