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Most people nowadays have separated from at least one domestic partner by the time they retire. Can you picture yourself now if you had stayed with the first one?
Where would you be, what would you be doing, if you were still with your first spouse?
In my case, I guess I have had more than an average number of domestic partners, and I still love them all. But my life has been incredibly rich, I think more so than if I had remained tied to any of the earlier relationships I had. I don't have a single regret about having missed out on anything. My only regrets are that I disappointed (or even hurt) some wonderful people along the way. But as far as I know, they have all done just fine without me.
I'd still be supporting us, paying all the bills, bailing him out of the constant problems that stem from his inability to control his alcohol consumption.
Fortunately, another woman has taken my place since I divorced him years ago. For example, in May my ex and I, our daughter and her boyfriend, my mother, and ex's girlfriend and daughter all went out to dinner together to celebrate our daughter's college graduation. We had a GREAT time. Everyone gets along well. And at the end of the night, when my ex obviously had had way too much to drink as is his custom, his current girlfriend had to take care of him, and I got to go back to my hotel in peace.
Since my first husband was quite a lot older than myself and died in 1992 I'd be a widow. Now if I was still married to my 3rd husband I'd be living in Australia now.
So much of what has been said is true. I would be better off financially, but would have lived a very sad, empty life, devoid of love, happiness, and the joys of being with someone who truly loves and appreciates me for who I am.
No regrets here. I feel sad for people who stay in a dead relationship for financial stability, and the comfort of an old pair of shoes, with holes, that make you miserable, but you don't get new ones.
Don't be afraid to be alone at any age. Being alone is better than being unhappy. A whole new life, that is better than you can imagine is waiting for you. Embrace happiness.
Being alone is better than being unhappy...Embrace happiness.
THIS!
If he hadn't fooled around and fell in love with a moron, I probably would have left him anyway, but I would've drug my feet and wasted a couple more years of my life before I got around to it. So I guess I should thank him for giving me the proper motivation to leave.
So much of what has been said is true. I would be better off financially, but would have lived a very sad, empty life, devoid of love, happiness, and the joys of being with someone who truly loves and appreciates me for who I am.
No regrets here. I feel sad for people who stay in a dead relationship for financial stability, and the comfort of an old pair of shoes, with holes, that make you miserable, but you don't get new ones.
Don't be afraid to be alone at any age. Being alone is better than being unhappy. A whole new life, that is better than you can imagine is waiting for you. Embrace happiness.
Most definitely! I was unhappily married - twice. Then I had a long period of being single in which I was very happy. Then married again and still happy.
I would be much like Mightyqueen801, excepting, his problem was not alcohol. He has what used to be called (I think) "Peter Pan Syndrome." Absolutely would not grow up. Like most others, WE were young & SO stupid. My 22nd birthday came 1 month after the birth of OUR only child. Our 3rd anniversary was 5 days later. He spent it out with friends getting a head start on the Halloween by toilet papering houses, throwing eggs at cars, etc. Which ended up with him being arrested. His momma & daddy had to bail him out, etc. He had a deep desire (!!??) to modify our Volkswagen Beetle into a race car (too much Herbie??). Local mechanics got a lot of $$. He loved all things porno. He had porno magazines about fetishes I had no idea could exist! I could go on & on. But I finally had to decide to end it. Not only was he a "child", but he was going to be a terrible influence on our son. Of course, the child support was not even sporadic. 4 wives & 3 grandchildren later he still lives in "Neverland."
So many times I realize I should have killed her, done the five years, and would have been way ahead of the game (and the world would be a much better place--and her current concubine would have been spared his share of the pain.)
Impossible to say. When we married I was 27 and she was 19. Her age should have been a red flag, but we were deeply in love and love is blind. After nine and a half years she fell out of love and left. So the what-if scenario would have to factor in her no longer being in love with me but my continuing to be in love with her - not a good scenario for continued happiness. Financially I would be better off, but since I am comfortable that is beside the point. We never know what the future holds, and imagining that future with the same spouse is just that - imagination. I heard later that she was developing early-onset Alzheimer's. I had wanted nothing except for her to stay, but what a nightmare that might have been (with the Alzheimer's). I don't know what happened to her - I no longer have any way to contact her.
Escort: Why didn't you ever try again ? So young and single all those years? Must have been a really great love if you never got over it and never found someone her equal.
For my situation, I stayed way too long. When I finally found out how he had crippled me with the bills and secrets, I was able to skidaddle. If I had stayed, I would have killed him eventually.
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