Reconnecting with high school/young adult friends in the retirement years

[no kudzu]

I am friends with many old high school friends from the 60's on FB but none of my college friends. The high school friends almost all grew up together, knew each others parents and siblings, etc. This was in a university town and most of us moved very far away because our parents were associated with the university. But some stayed in the same area. During the election we found a very similar political leaning and we still share a lot of articles, cartoons, etc. It has been somewhat fun but there will not be too much to learn new when we have our 50th reunion next summer.

One of the guys decided since so many where in the same town or nearby we should get together once a month for dinner or lunch. The first even only 6 showed up and there have been no other get togethers. This tells me we are happy to be on FB but realize not much more to be gained by face to face meetings. That's OK.

[biscuitmom]

I'll always thank God for Facebook that lets me connect with my high school friends and move beyond any illusions that they were ever important to me. They're all good and amazing people but they have nothing to do with my life.

[catsy girl]

i had no contact with high school friends until two years ago, following the 50th reunion ( which i didn't attend ). i did send in information, including e-mail to a directory of graduates, my year as well as others, and heard from two people, one of whom i was very friendly with in high school, and one i knew better in elementary school.

both live in the town where we grew up which is about 80 miles from where i am now. since re-connecting, i've seen both of them twice, have talked on the phone quite a few times, e-mail occasionally, exchanged books, and generally maintain a casual friendship. i would say that i consider both frienships valuable and they have given me an interesting and different perspective on the times i grew up and on myself, as a teenager during those years. one of the friends and i have had many interesting discussions on how people age, specifically single women, expectations of our generation, and how lives for many of our age group are unfolding.

i write personal essays, as an avocation, and these friendships have given me a window into some worlds i don't know a lot about. as a former social worker, i find people and their relationships generally interesting, and these women are both insightful and articulate. growing up in the same time period and in basically similar neighborhoods, it is interesting to see the twists and turns their lives have taken. while i'm not interested in re-connecting to have another friend to go to the movies with, shop with, or whatever else women friends might do together, i am interested in some in-depth conversations about where we find ourselves in life and the choices, if they were choices, we made to get us where we are now. i am also interested in how people process change, and the effect that changes, especialy those we don't choose, have on aging.

these women are willing and interested in sharing their experiences and their feelings about their experiences. for me, regardless of the frequency of contact, that makes them friends of value.

catsy girl