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I've always felt that the loss of a child would be the most searing, difficult loss to bear, although I have not experienced it myself. My imagination is inadequate, I am sure, to conceive of the pain involved.
It's hard to believe it'll be six months on Tuesday. I still remember that day almost like yesterday. I've been attending a support group. It's helped quite a bit. I wish he could have found peace in another way.
He's doing OK. He's been having a really hard time dealing his brother's death. They were very close as children. It was hard to imagine one without the other.
Why, why, why...until we have to accept that the life that was lived was lived in the time that was given (one's "life capacity"). For me, writing (about anything) brings some kind of relief. There's a book called Writing as a Way of Healing. Every anniversary seems a chance for closeness.
Worst: Obamacare -- my private insurance policy was dropped because of Obamacare, and they raised the price $4,000 a year. I don't want the exchange insurance which is inferior and even more expensive, nor do I qualify for a subsidy.
Best: Had extensive health testing done while I still had my GREAT private insurance (which they tried to call "junk" and substandard because it didn't cover me for maternity costs or a sex change), and all tests came back as exceptional good health.
(Great compassion here for all those who truly had a tragic "worst.")
I am so very very sorry. I lost my child too. The purpose of grief is to help you find a way to maintain your connection with your child. Through time you will find your own special way. Our hearts never truly heal, our minds do not forget, but we do find a sort of peace and the intense pain of grief will go away.
Be kind to yourself. Wishing you gentleness this year.
I've always felt that the loss of a child would be the most searing, difficult loss to bear, although I have not experienced it myself. My imagination is inadequate, I am sure, to conceive of the pain involved.
This quote I see floating around FB sums it up perfectly:
A person that loses a partner is called a widow. A child who loses a parent is called an orphan. But there is no word to describe a parent that loses a child, because the loss is like no other
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