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Old 05-20-2014, 11:16 AM
 
676 posts, read 746,693 times
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After 44 years of marriage, how do we split up with not a lot of money ?? About 2800.00 a month for us to live on. I'm staying put. My rent is low and my house is nice. Has anyone been in this situation ?
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Old 05-20-2014, 11:21 AM
 
Location: Great State of Texas
86,093 posts, read 72,563,848 times
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Maybe just go back and read the last thread you made on this topic and re-read all the replies.

Retirement and seperated or divorced
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Old 05-20-2014, 11:22 AM
 
Location: Powell, Oh
1,847 posts, read 4,089,284 times
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So you each split $2800?
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Old 05-20-2014, 11:53 AM
 
Location: Near a river
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Each take your own income and then split the assets. And perhaps get counseling first, as it seems like for you and for many others of us that splitting up a marriage is not a happy or secure prospect.
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Old 05-20-2014, 04:12 PM
 
676 posts, read 746,693 times
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$1400.00 apiece.
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Old 05-20-2014, 04:55 PM
 
Location: middle tennessee
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If you each draw a SS check of $1400, nothing will change. If $2800 is the total of your SS checks, then after the divorce, you will each draw your own check until your husband dies (assuming your husband dies before you) when you will be eligible for widow's benefits.

If your $2800 income comes from sources other than SS, that income will be divided according to your divorce decree.

Is this what you're asking?

I'm sure someone will correct me if I am wrong.
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Old 05-21-2014, 10:28 AM
 
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
22,649 posts, read 40,020,325 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HappyTexan View Post
Maybe just go back and read the last thread you made on this topic and re-read all the replies.

Retirement and seperated or divorced
add one... Have you ever read "Boundaries" ? "Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible."Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No, to Take Control of Your Life by Henry Cloud | 9780310247456 | Paperback | Barnes & Noble
for $8 it might be worth it (or free at library or a zillion local garage sales / thrift stores. If you need a book and can't afford it.. ask for it, or join Paperbackbookswap (for video and hardbacks too!)

I know you have hit your limit, and that is typical for a certain gender to go off the cliff of no return, due to delaying response till too late. (Often for good reason... saving their life). But ALL is not lost.

Why divorce? just get your space if that is what is necessary. But protect your assets as necessary to survive. (depending on the state, that may require divorce, but he doesn't seem like a lost cause... just a serious disruption) I had one of those for 32 yrs (Caregiving for a violent but disabled parent). This too will pass (or you may pass... I often hoped that for me)
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Old 05-25-2014, 07:58 PM
 
Location: Florida
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Sounds like a roommate might help with the finances.
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Old 05-25-2014, 08:55 PM
 
Location: Florida -
8,767 posts, read 10,859,665 times
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In your other thread, you said the primary problem was that you were just worn-out after being a caregiver for many of your 44-married years together. In this thread, it sounds like you have reached a decision to divorce ... if you can manage to live on $1400 per month. This is too big a decision to make without seriously evaluating your motives and expectations; ... and also spending time with a financial counselor.

I've known people in your situation who, in their 60's, after many years of relatively unhappy marriage, conclude that their marriage isn't going to change over their final 10-20 years,... and that they are running-out of time to start living the life they want to live, instead of the one they feel 'stuck with.' But, like you, they often conclude that neither would be able to afford to live even close to the same standard of living on half the money. That often makes alternative solutions seem more viable (such as seriously modified living arrangements, counseling and a real attitude change).

Sorry you are in this situation, but, it took 44-years to get to this point - and you probably aren't going to come-up with a quick and easy solution to all that needs fixing in your marriage. But, after 44-years, it's probably worth a little more effort to see if any other resolution is possible.
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