U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 07-13-2014, 05:36 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,759,876 times
Reputation: 32309

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Garthur View Post
One of the biggest fantasies is"it won't happen to me". Why is it that when you bring up mortality and the possibility that you my not live to some ripe old age, they start talking about how long their family lives. No one wants to be realistic that they may not live that long. Most of the families that I know always have a few that live to ripe old ages, but they never mention the ones that die of cancer at 45, or the one that died in a car accident at age 40. The same thing can happen to anyone at anytime. A car accident, health problems that don't kill you but make life very tough.

If they live old enough, every women in mine or my wife's family has had dementia for years before they died. It begins in the late 60's.

I have seen fellow workers that were perfectly healthy that got sick and a week later died. The sad part is that they were already retirement age and could have retired years before. I have a list of more then 30 people that have died that were my age or younger then me at the time of their death. Of all the former employees that I worked with for 30 years there or more that have passed on then are still alive and I'm only 60.
You are right, of course, that anyone can die at any age. I could die within five minutes of clicking on the "submit" button for this present post.

However, as I have participated in this Retirement Forum over the years, when people talk about the longevity in their families I get the impression they are mostly making the point that since longevity runs in their families, they will be orienting their retirement planning around the possibility that they may just have a long life also. That is only reasonable and does not necessarily constitute the denial of "it won't happen to me", although some people are doubtless in denial as you note.

We are all influenced more by what we see around us than by statistics anyway, in my opinion. We see longevity, or lack of it, in our relatives, our colleagues, our neighbors, our classmates from high school, and others whom we know. Therefore I am interested in your observations. Among your co-workers who have died, what seems to be a rough average age of death? And what is/was your occupation? Not a "dangerous" one, I hope, such as coal mining where so many wind up with lung disease which affects longevity.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 07-13-2014, 07:49 PM
 
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 18,997,544 times
Reputation: 15649
Quote:
Originally Posted by Robyn55 View Post
I tried to find the article you mentioned - but couldn't.

And are you sure you heard it right? Keeping in mind that there's a difference between dying *of* Alzheimer's - and dying *with* Alzheimer's from something else. The older people are - the more likely they will have some form of dementia when they die. But they won't necessarily die of dementia. They'll usually die of something else first. Alzheimer's runs in my mother's side of the family - but only one person in her very extended family has ever died *of* Alzheimer's - as opposed to dying (usually at a pretty advanced age) with some degree of dementia.

FWIW - I basically don't worry about this stuff at all. And - in all honesty - the less healthy you live - the sooner you will probably die - and the less likely you'll be to have any kind of dementia associated with old age. Robyn

No, I didn't misread, and yes, it appears to be a very big deal and apparently way underreported and tracked. Just think of the ramifications in the healthcare system for starters. And boomers are just starting into the period when we may be most at risk.

Alzheimer's deaths much more common than realized: study | Reuters
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-13-2014, 07:52 PM
 
Location: SW US
2,223 posts, read 2,040,423 times
Reputation: 3834
Quote:
Originally Posted by Robyn55 View Post
Well - you put plans/documents in place if that happens. And it's not like it's something that happens overnight. There's plenty of time to plan once you realize that something's going on.
Both my parents lived into their mid 90's. Mom is still here. Dad lost the ability to handle finances, etc. in his late 80's, Mom lost it a bit later. I became disabled early and depend quite a bit on investments which I manage myself. At some unknown point, I will become unable to do that effectively.

I've been wondering what others are doing to prepare for that time, which is why I brought this up. Will I put it into index funds? Into annuities? Will I know when the time has come to do that, or something else? Is no one else thinking about these questions?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-13-2014, 07:53 PM
 
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 18,997,544 times
Reputation: 15649
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheShadow View Post
My dad died WITH Alzheimer's, and so did his brother, so I have plans (and LTC insurance) in place just in case.
Yes, many die WITH Alzheimer's. Yet the medical research emerging shows that many are dying FROM the disease. And the LTC plan may have to be a very long-term one. Two of my acquaintances had mothers who recently died (with or from) A's, and they each had it for many years, institutionalized.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-13-2014, 08:44 PM
 
2,429 posts, read 3,228,824 times
Reputation: 3330
As for planning and knowing the future....

I was rased with the mantra "no day is promised to any one." So if there's something you want to do -- do it. If there's something you want to say -- say it. I was even told once. If you see a present for someone in June, don't hold it until Xmas -- because neither one of you may be here by then. It was drilled into us -- "live with no regrets."

That's doesn't me step on people or stab them in the back to get want you want...it also doesn't mean, don't plan to live a long time.

As for retirement and enjoying life....I'm 52, SINK, and would retire or quit tomorrow if I could. I just don't enjoy -- or want to -- work anymore. Period. But the reality is I can't afford to leave work. Sooo I am planning for the day I CAN, and it looks like the earliest that would be is 62, 8 years away...but 65 is more likely. I probably COULD do it at 62, but I don't need to even think about that right now....other than planning for it.

Now that I have a loose plan in place and have 'run some numbers' -- other than saving more, there's nothing more I can do right now...other than keeping an eye on how lawmakers may want to change the Soc. Sec. system, and learning how changes might affect me.

I have to admit I fear a perfect storm coming regarding entitlement benefits vs health care costs. Maybe I'm too pessimistic -- and it's not readily a DREAD -- but I'm not as confident in the SS system as I once was. As a person who is on the very tail end of the baby-boom wave. I do feel like the older baby-boomers will use up the system, or bankrupt social programs.....And it's those of us whose full retirement age is ALREADY 67, quite frankly -- could/will get sc rew ed. More of our SS could be taxed, heck, they might even tax our Roth IRAs after declaring withdrawals would be tax free.

So while I plan -- I also know there's only so much prep one can do given the information at hand.

I was looking into LTC insurance. But I've made the decision that since I don't have kids, nor the strong desire to definitely leave an inheritance to any one (it's be nice but it's not the priority) .....that (worse case scenario) as long as I have 3 years of private pay for a nursing facility (and I already have that), that I'll just private pay and go on Medicaid after that...aad so be it.

My 88 year old mom has dementia (with the presumption of Alzhemiers)...I HOPE I'm NOT looking at my future. But as the title of this thread says...face it folks, we just don't know.

Last edited by rdflk; 07-13-2014 at 09:27 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-13-2014, 11:12 PM
 
Location: Staten Island
1,653 posts, read 1,797,873 times
Reputation: 2353
For as long as I can remember the older people around me were talking about retirement, preparing for retirement. But when many of them finally made it to retirement age they didn't want to retire. Some weren't able to, many others choose to keep working, others just didn't make it.

We spend our lives being told to save for the future, then when we get there we still don't know what to do. How ever there is that middle between preparing for the future and actually getting there.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-14-2014, 03:39 AM
 
29,813 posts, read 34,900,894 times
Reputation: 11730
Quote:
Originally Posted by Windwalker2 View Post
Both my parents lived into their mid 90's. Mom is still here. Dad lost the ability to handle finances, etc. in his late 80's, Mom lost it a bit later. I became disabled early and depend quite a bit on investments which I manage myself. At some unknown point, I will become unable to do that effectively.

I've been wondering what others are doing to prepare for that time, which is why I brought this up. Will I put it into index funds? Into annuities? Will I know when the time has come to do that, or something else? Is no one else thinking about these questions?
That is a consideration many are taking into account. I think there is another financial transition to play out and it will hit each generation harder. When retirement income is largely pensions with SS that cash flow coming in is self sustaining. Now with greater reliance on investments in the absence of pensions, retiree's will have to construct their own delivery system absent management by them. The more affluent are doing that it is the masses that might be the concern.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-14-2014, 03:46 AM
 
29,813 posts, read 34,900,894 times
Reputation: 11730
Do we really think Medicaid will be paying nursing home care in the future? State budgets are being crippled by it now. The Affordable Care Act has made it worse and it could become compounded. California is being accused by activist of trying to drop folks from Covered California as they had a surge of new enrollees who previously qualified and the state pays for them.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-14-2014, 04:04 AM
 
Location: Cushing OK
14,547 posts, read 17,569,443 times
Reputation: 16777
Some fifteen years ago I learned a valuable lesson. The floor can fall out beneath you at any time, and leave you scrambling where there was no plan. I was married, home business, not rich but we paid the bills. Then he departed, I discovered most of the savings was owed to creditors in the business he hadn't bothered to pay, and I couldn't pay my bills, ending up losing the house. I had what was in the car. But you know something? I learned to look for things to appreciate. Maybe it was a nice spot to eat lunch or a beatuiful bird song or a place to sleep at night. But you moved on and kept trying.

Since then, nothing has ever felt as 'permenant' as it did before. And I've learned to embrase the 'now' while paying heed to the monthly budget. If I get a treat, like when my fil took me sailing, I hold it as a dear memory. If I hadn't moved maybe I could have gone again, but who knows? The memory of that boat ride is the one I treasure as a joy.

I just remember that we never never never know how permenant anything is and how we should pay attention to the things that happen today. Yes, plan but be aware that you still don't know if your making the right plans. But too many people 'put up' with things for 'tomorrow' and its too late for them when 'tomorrow' comes.

Treat every good time as if it was the last time you'd get the chance and take all the joy you can. And don't live today worrying about tomorrow so much you can't enjoy the present.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-14-2014, 05:47 AM
 
Location: sumter
8,602 posts, read 5,399,513 times
Reputation: 6618
Quote:
Originally Posted by nightbird47 View Post
Some fifteen years ago I learned a valuable lesson. The floor can fall out beneath you at any time, and leave you scrambling where there was no plan. I was married, home business, not rich but we paid the bills. Then he departed, I discovered most of the savings was owed to creditors in the business he hadn't bothered to pay, and I couldn't pay my bills, ending up losing the house. I had what was in the car. But you know something? I learned to look for things to appreciate. Maybe it was a nice spot to eat lunch or a beatuiful bird song or a place to sleep at night. But you moved on and kept trying.

Since then, nothing has ever felt as 'permenant' as it did before. And I've learned to embrase the 'now' while paying heed to the monthly budget. If I get a treat, like when my fil took me sailing, I hold it as a dear memory. If I hadn't moved maybe I could have gone again, but who knows? The memory of that boat ride is the one I treasure as a joy.

I just remember that we never never never know how permenant anything is and how we should pay attention to the things that happen today. Yes, plan but be aware that you still don't know if your making the right plans. But too many people 'put up' with things for 'tomorrow' and its too late for them when 'tomorrow' comes.

Treat every good time as if it was the last time you'd get the chance and take all the joy you can. And don't live today worrying about tomorrow so much you can't enjoy the present.
Very well said, I agree.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top