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Old 07-24-2014, 08:37 AM
 
Location: Colorado...
662 posts, read 815,204 times
Reputation: 893

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jertheber View Post
Well, I for one have heard these blowhards of travel expounding on the finer points of such and such a country, and, have you been there? There are people who love to lord it over the uninitiated untraveled souls and go to great lengths to show that their travelogues are sooo fascinating. In reality the poor people whom they are trying so hard to impress are darn near falling asleep and wish the blowhard would fall through the floor.LOL. Don't discount the stories of those who will go to a ton of expense and time just to impress those they think of as friends.
This probably explains why we are homebodies and don't socialize much: I don't give jerks a second chance to "impress" me - I avoid them. I can only imagine what else pours forth from "friends" like that, which begs the question: why do you hang around jerks like that?

We have a dear friend who loves to entertain, host dinner parties, etc. More or less the opposite of us. And she has described the "friends" they entertain, and they sound like some of the most miserable jerks ever. And without a hint of irony, my friend agrees, says she gets sick of their crap, but...she just "loves to entertain" and to have people around her dinner table, and evidently even if that includes jerks. Fortunately, we don't have the "must be around others" disease that many seem to have. I am sure we are missing out on something, but at least we don't have to voluntarily deal with jerks.
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Old 07-24-2014, 10:01 AM
 
29,772 posts, read 34,856,103 times
Reputation: 11681
Hmmm don't think what others do or don't do bothers me as long as they are happy. If they aren't they might want to try something different. We sorta keep a low profile about much we do or have as I don't feel compelled to compare with others nor should they with us. But some think they need to. Especially when you are in the early stages of retirement. I guess it is human nature to wonder how others are doing in retirement and how well they planned and how wow financially off they are. Some folks may just be trying to send out signals that life is good etc or trying to cover up that it isn't. We are by nature sometimes.curious about others retirement and they often about ours,
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Old 07-25-2014, 03:19 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic east coast
5,371 posts, read 9,859,230 times
Reputation: 10243
Sounds like, to me, that the OP has reached what some Buddhists call Nirvana--the end of desires.

When you love the life you live and what you have without constantly seeking new, more, and better, you are truly a contented person. Rejoice in your lovely and simple contentment. It sounds both rich and peaceful.

When you have a lively interior life of art, culture and imagination, you need not leave your armchair, garden or porch!
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Old 07-25-2014, 04:10 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,729,443 times
Reputation: 32304
Quote:
Originally Posted by luckyram View Post
Exactly.....there are a few posters on here (won't mention any names but if you search around you'll find them....one having the initials "ER") who think they are the sole arbiters of what is "normal" and/or dictate what is acceptable as far as living life goes.

They look down upon or judge people who don't live up to their ideals of how life should be lived based on their narrow mindsets.

There is nothing wrong with living life on your own terms......again, the whole different strokes thing.

I'm ok with limited travel & social interaction but realize others may disagree and want to go all over the place and want constant interaction.

I'd rather relax at or around home than deal with the stresses of travel (ESPECIALLY driving long distances).
LOL. I guess you mean me, as I don't know of another poster in the Retirement Forum having the initials "ER". I'm responding late as, ironically, I am on a trip.

First, your interpretation of my thinking is incorrect, as I do not consider myself an "arbiter" of acceptability or normality. I do have opinions, just as you do, and I have given them, which is what discussion forums are all about.

News Flash: Those whose opinions differ from yours do not necessarily have "narrow mindsets". What a shame you chose to engage in name-calling. And that is especially bizarre in that I had not even posted yet in this thread, this being my first post here. Responding to a specific post makes more sense than launching a broadside personal attack against another poster. Such behavior is the crabgrass on the lawn of life; we should be able to differ without such displays of anger and hostility. Let me suggest "I don't see it that way...." (followed by a presentation of your views). Wouldn't that be better?

All this is doubly ironic because I see nothing particularly wrong with the lifestyle described by the original poster of this thread, even though it differs somewhat from my lifestyle.

In case you would like to participate in a rational and civil discussion, I will be interested to hear what you find stressful about driving long distances. Notice that I did not say there is anything wrong with people who don't like to drive long distances. We all like such different things, and we gain understanding of other people by listening to their explanations of their preferences.
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Old 07-25-2014, 04:18 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,729,443 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jazzcat22 View Post
.......

We aren't hermits. We go out every day to the gym, which we love. We socialize numerous times each week. We love our life and don't want to escape from it, even for a weekend.

Is this pathological----or just a difference in preferences, even though easily 95% of the population wants to travel and get away?
Just for the record, I see nothing wrong with your lifestyle. I state that because I was attacked for supposedly being opposed, even though I had not yet responded in this thread. I have quoted the portion of your original post which seems to me to be the crux of the matter.
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Old 07-25-2014, 04:29 PM
 
Location: SW MO
23,605 posts, read 31,471,910 times
Reputation: 29071
Quote:
Originally Posted by LittleDolphin View Post
Sounds like, to me, that the OP has reached what some Buddhists call Nirvana--the end of desires.

When you love the life you live and what you have without constantly seeking new, more, and better, you are truly a contented person. Rejoice in your lovely and simple contentment. It sounds both rich and peaceful.

When you have a lively interior life of art, culture and imagination, you need not leave your armchair, garden or porch!
The Ozarks are a simple place where predominant philosophy of life seems to be, "Go ahead not too far, not too fast." After the madcap days of politics it suits us.
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Old 07-25-2014, 04:30 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,729,443 times
Reputation: 32304
Default The issue of travelers who brag:

Quote:
Originally Posted by NewToCA View Post
That can be true, but homebodies can do it too with where they dine and what they own (especially vehicles).

So that can cut both ways, you can be a smug jerk who travels or one who stays at home.
.
What a wise observation! There are simply braggarts in life, both among the stay-at-home crowd and among the travelers.

While I cannot pretend to know the percentage of travelers who travel mainly for the oneupmanship, I would rather imagine it is pretty small. The reason for my belief is that it's too much trouble to travel to do it only to impress friends and neighbors. I love to travel, for its own sake, but I recognize that one has to get ready to be gone - packing, arranging for the mail and the newspapers, making sure the car is ready (if it's a car trip) and so on.

I am on a car trip right now and have driven about 2,000 miles so far. I am not yet at the half-way point. I am having a great time, but it was a bit of work to get ready - had to buy four news tires for the car and many other things. It was a scramble to get certain business matters in order, for example.
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Old 07-26-2014, 05:26 AM
 
Location: in the miseries
3,302 posts, read 3,578,241 times
Reputation: 3810
I don't know any people who like to brag about their trips.
We have travelled a lot.
If talking about our trips to people who ask makes us braggarts I don't get the fine art of conversation.
Btw BH loves to socialize; me not so much.
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Old 07-26-2014, 05:55 AM
 
Location: Florida
19,786 posts, read 19,886,317 times
Reputation: 23202
Quote:
Originally Posted by luvmyhoss View Post
I don't know any people who like to brag about their trips.
We have travelled a lot.
If talking about our trips to people who ask makes us braggarts I don't get the fine art of conversation.
Btw BH loves to socialize; me not so much.

I think this whole idea is just from "name dropper' type people who, I very much doubt travel just so they can brag (although, some might)but do think they are impressing others by how many places they've been. Travel snobs.
It makes you wonder if they really enjoy the traveling or if it's more like counting the notches on your gun belt...just to see and brag about how many you can accumulate.
Not interesting anecdotes or mini-travelogues, just boring recitations of all the places they've been to.
Hopefully, this type socializes mostly with people just like them so they can spend their times one-upping each other.
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Old 07-26-2014, 07:24 AM
 
3,937 posts, read 3,259,672 times
Reputation: 11292
Quote:
Originally Posted by NewToCA View Post
That can be true, but homebodies can do it too with where they dine and what they own (especially vehicles).

So that can cut both ways, you can be a smug jerk who travels or one who stays at home.

In our case, back to the original thread topic, we have a split point of view. Ideally, I'd like to travel about 50-70 days a year, but not really take any plane trips. Wife hates to travel, absolutely has to drag herself to go on a trip. Once there she generally has a decent time, but she will be just as difficult to get out of the house for the next trip.

Like the OP, we have our daily home routines and are fine with them, including regular stops by the gym and trips around the area. But I also like getting away for about 5 or so days a month, or for a week or so every few months. This is in addition to short term trips of only a couple of nights, to places fairly close by like San Francisco, Napa Valley or Monterrey.
Yeah, jerks are a pain regardless of what they carry on about. I'm also more of a get out now and then traveller and love to road trip to the wine country or the Oregon coast, the older I get the less likely I'll be wanting to fly long distances. I think most people do travel with the idea of relaxation or adventure in new places as their focus rather than outright blinging to impress, and, the other seldom mentioned aspect of travel has to do with the fact of home being a "job" to those who obsess over their home and gardens often to the point of exhaustion. For these people travel is the only respite they get from that routine.
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