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Yeah, jerks are a pain regardless of what they carry on about. I'm also more of a get out now and then traveller and love to road trip to the wine country or the Oregon coast, the older I get the less likely I'll be wanting to fly long distances. I think most people do travel with the idea of relaxation or adventure in new places as their focus rather than outright blinging to impress, and, the other seldom mentioned aspect of travel has to do with the fact of home being a "job" to those who obsess over their home and gardens often to the point of exhaustion. For these people travel is the only respite they get from that routine.
That point about home becoming a job for those who obsess about their appearances is something I've seen quite a few times. We don't have that issue, but my parents have always been like that. Back when they first retired 20+ years ago I asked if they planned to make any long car trips (mom won't fly) and they said they can't because their condo needs care. My dad got on the condo board, became president in a matter of a couple of years, and this allowed him to obsess about the maintenance of the entire building (88 units) instead of just his own property.
But this is what they like to do, and all these years later nothing has changed. There is always a roofing job, repainting the building, fixing the parking lot, meeting new disposal requirements or making the building compliant with new laws. But they stay very busy, and they'd view travel as taking them away from their "job".
That point about home becoming a job for those who obsess about their appearances is something I've seen quite a few times. We don't have that issue, but my parents have always been like that. Back when they first retired 20+ years ago I asked if they planned to make any long car trips (mom won't fly) and they said they can't because their condo needs care. My dad got on the condo board, became president in a matter of a couple of years, and this allowed him to obsess about the maintenance of the entire building (88 units) instead of just his own property.
But this is what they like to do, and all these years later nothing has changed. There is always a roofing job, repainting the building, fixing the parking lot, meeting new disposal requirements or making the building compliant with new laws. But they stay very busy, and they'd view travel as taking them away from their "job".
Your father's experience and attitude are interesting. After 13 years on our townhouse association board, I was elected president about a month ago. We have only 26 units, so our operation is probably simpler than that of your father. BUT, I never would have accepted the presidency if it meant to me that I would be stuck there all the time. Right now I am on a four-week road trip; there is a vice-president to handle things while I am gone, and in any case I am available by cell phone and email.
Personally I would never allow the condo association to take over my life the way your father has chosen to allow it, I must say that at least he has something meaningful and worthwhile to occupy his time. It requires interaction with other people and problem solving skills. That sure beats watching TV all day every day. Many of us are not well suited to total aimlessness.
Your father's experience and attitude are interesting. After 13 years on our townhouse association board, I was elected president about a month ago. We have only 26 units, so our operation is probably simpler than that of your father. BUT, I never would have accepted the presidency if it meant to me that I would be stuck there all the time. Right now I am on a four-week road trip; there is a vice-president to handle things while I am gone, and in any case I am available by cell phone and email.
Personally I would never allow the condo association to take over my life the way your father has chosen to allow it, I must say that at least he has something meaningful and worthwhile to occupy his time. It requires interaction with other people and problem solving skills. That sure beats watching TV all day every day. Many of us are not well suited to total aimlessness.
Right, I agree with your observations. You have a different personality than my dad, and that is why you can take a four week trip. In his case, my parents never left the place for more than a week, and by the end of the week (it was to visit us and the kids, at that time) he'd be on the phone a few times a day speaking with contractors or other condo board members.
But that doesn't make him pathological, it just means that he enjoys the personal interactions and intellectual engagement. To him, travel is a fairly mindless activity. His comment to me, who likes to travel, is that "a brick is a brick and a tree is a tree. You can see them right down your own street."
Right, I agree with your observations. You have a different personality than my dad, and that is why you can take a four week trip. In his case, my parents never left the place for more than a week, and by the end of the week (it was to visit us and the kids, at that time) he'd be on the phone a few times a day speaking with contractors or other condo board members.
But that doesn't make him pathological, it just means that he enjoys the personal interactions and intellectual engagement. To him, travel is a fairly mindless activity. His comment to me, who likes to travel, is that "a brick is a brick and a tree is a tree. You can see them right down your own street."
Just out of curiosity, did your parents travel at all before your father retired and have they done so at anytime in the 20 years since?
One of the tings I love about the Ozarks is that I can take the same roads to get from Point A to Point B and at almost every turn of the road, and they are constant, something surprises me even though I've traveled the route many dozens of times. It may be the wildflowers, wildlife, the colors of the leaves even if they're still green or something that's always been there, perhaps a bit hidden off the road, that I never noticed before. Sometimes it's a late 19th century barn or log cabin that has finally collapsed or been blown over and at other times it's a sudden change in the weather between one hill or holler to the next.
Clearly your father has other priorities, and presumably your mother as well, and it's fine with them which is as it should be. Diff'rent strokes and all that 60s babble.
Just out of curiosity, did your parents travel at all before your father retired and have they done so at anytime in the 20 years since?
One of the tings I love about the Ozarks is that I can take the same roads to get from Point A to Point B and at almost every turn of the road, and they are constant, something surprises me even though I've traveled the route many dozens of times. It may be the wildflowers, wildlife, the colors of the leaves even if they're still green or something that's always been there, perhaps a bit hidden off the road, that I never noticed before. Sometimes it's a late 19th century barn or log cabin that has finally collapsed or been blown over and at other times it's a sudden change in the weather between one hill or holler to the next.
Clearly your father has other priorities, and presumably your mother as well, and it's fine with them which is as it should be. Diff'rent strokes and all that 60s babble.
If you exclude spending the full summer at "the shore", they just traveled a little bit before retirement. They were fairly poor but wanted to show us something really different. Because they couldn't afford to do much, they took us on a few trips up to Canada (wasn't all that far from Philly, where we lived). Seeing Montreal, Quebec and Ottawa was their idea of giving us some creative experiences, kind of like going to Europe for those who couldn't afford it.
We did spend about nine or ten weeks every summer at Atlantic City or Ocean City, NJ, from 1955 through 1964. My dad's mom had a very old (circa 1880's) apartment there that she stayed in part time, and let us use part of it for the summer. My mom would take my sister and me there as soon as school stopped, and my dad would visit for a couple of nights on the weekends. It was really hot there, no air conditioning, and we all shared a room that was about 300 square feet, everything in a single room (except for the bathroom, of course). We had a double Murphy Bed and a couple of canvas fold up cots, and that was how we lived for that period. The massive Breakers Hotel was across the street, and since we had to leave the window open at night we woke up to the sound of clanging dishes from their kitchen every morning, 6:00 AM on the dot.
If you exclude spending the full summer at "the shore", they just traveled a little bit before retirement. They were fairly poor but wanted to show us something really different. Because they couldn't afford to do much, they took us on a few trips up to Canada (wasn't all that far from Philly, where we lived). Seeing Montreal, Quebec and Ottawa was their idea of giving us some creative experiences, kind of like going to Europe for those who couldn't afford it.
We did spend about nine or ten weeks every summer at Atlantic City or Ocean City, NJ, from 1955 through 1964. My dad's mom had a very old (circa 1880's) apartment there that she stayed in part time, and let us use part of it for the summer. My mom would take my sister and me there as soon as school stopped, and my dad would visit for a couple of nights on the weekends. It was really hot there, no air conditioning, and we all shared a room that was about 300 square feet, everything in a single room (except for the bathroom, of course). We had a double Murphy Bed and a couple of canvas fold up cots, and that was how we lived for that period. The massive Breakers Hotel was across the street, and since we had to leave the window open at night we woke up to the sound of clanging dishes from their kitchen every morning, 6:00 AM on the dot.
Like most of us who post here, I am plenty old enough to remember the days before airport security checks for passengers went into effect. Personally, I don't like standing in lines, whether at the airport or at the supermarket. And I agree that it's not "fun" to take off our shoes and empty our pockets into the plastic trays, then reverse the process after we have been cleared.
However, I don't see the process as being terribly onerous, and I am puzzled that some people find it sufficiently inconvenient and unpleasant to swear off flying entirely. What is the big deal, actually? We spend an extra 30 minutes (more or less, depending on the length of the lines) in the security check in order to board a flight. Are we, as retirees, so much in a hurry that 30 minutes makes a real difference?
Now before someone jumps in to misunderstand me, I agree that we are all free to choose what we will do or refuse to do, and that those choices should not be condemned unless they are harming ourselves or others. Refusing to brush and floss our teeth harms us in the long run, but refusing to travel by air harms no one. I am only seeking to understand, or "grasp" something that I don't find understandable.
I don't fly very often. My last flight was about nine months ago, when I flew from Los Angeles to Little Rock, Arkansas and back to attend the wedding of my niece. I wanted to attend the wedding, but I had limited time to be gone and driving there and back (besides requiring more time than I had at that moment) would have been more expensive than flying, especially counting a couple of motel stays each way. Renting a car at the airport was quick and convenient, likewise dropping it off upon departure, as the rental car companies compete against each other for business and they have worked out (over the years) ways to minimize the delays and inconveniences to their customers.
My age (69 at the time - nine months ago) had no bearing on the whole process. It was no more difficult or problematic for me at 69 than it would have been for a 25-year-old.
Keeping in mind that I have no quarrel with people who refuse to fly, sort of like I have no quarrel with people who refuse to drink coffee or see foreign films or listen to classical music, who can explain to me what is such a hassle about flying?
Keeping in mind that I have no quarrel with people who refuse to fly, sort of like I have no quarrel with people who refuse to drink coffee or see foreign films or listen to classical music, who can explain to me what is such a hassle about flying?
I think it's a hassle for those with physical challenges, like those who cannot be in one place too long or have mobility problems. Going through security checks added on to long flights can make it arduous for some. That said, I'm grateful for the security checks, though they cannot prevent the kind of air disasters we've seen in the past few months. But better than nothing. And as you say, retirees are out of the rat race, so waiting in line and going through the checkpoint is generally not a big deal. What I detest is waiting in the terminal (as in the time my sister dallied and made us miss our flight and were were there waiting for the next flight for almost 12 hours, not good).
I know a few folks who refuse to fly and it has to do with a problem with being up in the air, or with being "sealed up" in a plane. Those folks have real issues, and find ways around it or avoid events requiring flights.
They have a discussion thread about that topic on the Psychology Forum:
I know a few folks who refuse to fly and it has to do with a problem with being up in the air, or with being "sealed up" in a plane. Those folks have real issues, and find ways around it or avoid events requiring flights.
They have a discussion thread about that topic on the Psychology Forum:
Thanks for that link. I am going to read the thread when I have a bit more time.
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The "hassle" of flying
