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Old 07-23-2014, 10:43 AM
 
Location: North Liberty, IA
179 posts, read 200,013 times
Reputation: 268

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Wow, "hate" is a pretty strong word. Perhaps you could try being direct instead of all this passive aggressive stuff, just an idea.

I certainly didn't read the whole thread, but I skimmed down through several pages, and saw lots of practical suggestions as well as some that pointed out some specific considerations why your complaints may be valid. So, I don't quite get why you feel so persecuted. Also don't get why the mattress poster seemed to want us to solve the problems with his wife. I think everyone involved needs to step back, get a little more practical and caring and stop figuring out who to blame and why everyone else is wrong, but that's just my opnion.
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Old 07-23-2014, 11:39 AM
 
6,373 posts, read 3,582,535 times
Reputation: 7294
When I stay at my daughter's house in NY, I sleep on a mattress that I bought for her older sister when she was 2 years old. That was 33 years ago. A spring was coming up and hitting me in the back. Get a new mattress? No, just turn the mattress over. Problem solved. Since my daughter was 9 months pg this time when I visited here, I certainly was not about to ask her to turn it. I said I will turn the mattress when I get there. I may be 65, but I am by no means an invalid. If I can turn a QUEEN mattress alone, I certainly can turn a Twin. Before I came, she asked her HUSBAND to turn the mattress for me, and make the bed for me.

Common courtesy for any guest staying in your home, whatever their age.
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Old 07-23-2014, 11:46 AM
 
Location: Dallas
5,601 posts, read 4,936,550 times
Reputation: 16459
I never complain about anything while a guest in someone else's house. It's poor manners. If I know the mattress isn't to my liking, I have two choices - put up with it or make arrangements to spend the night in a hotel. There is no way I would expect someone to purchase a new mattress for my infrequent visits.

If I am hosting a house guest, I will do everything I can to make their stay enjoyable. But there is a limit to how much expense or work I am willing to take on. I don't think it is cruel at all. Not sure why the OP sees it as that.
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Old 07-23-2014, 11:57 AM
 
6,436 posts, read 9,958,163 times
Reputation: 8000
Quote:
Originally Posted by Happy in Wyoming View Post
Read these responses of uncaring and cold-hearted people. However, I bet they'll all be happy to collect any inheritance. Times have really changed. Few of the posts show any care whatsoever. The only truly supportive post I saw is a post from a kind old gent in Wyoming.
Most of this generation isn't going to live long due to blatant disrespect and hatred of their elders in general. I don't feel sorry because life has a way of coming full circle and giving you back what you put out.
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Old 07-23-2014, 12:11 PM
 
Location: Des Moines Metro
5,055 posts, read 6,020,437 times
Reputation: 9437
I guess I live in a different world.

If guests want to stay at my house, they can use my air bed (bed, not camping air mattress) or bring their own, and I do have a friend who travels with a single foam mattress from a folding bed! She tosses that on the floor and adds her sleeping bag to the top.

If it's someone especially elderly or picky, I'll spring for the Super 8. If they want something better, they can pay.

If none of that suits, they aren't welcome. As for the other thread, if the MIL couldn't sleep on that mattress, then a hotel should've been her next choice.

When I was traveling and staying with relatives, I took a camping air mattress and a sleeping bag. I parked myself in the basement or any out of the way corner so as not to be a bother.
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Old 07-23-2014, 02:12 PM
 
8,197 posts, read 11,915,499 times
Reputation: 17989
Quote:
Originally Posted by rzzz View Post
Not once are "the elderly" mentioned in that thread.
The OP doesn't even state how old the MIL is. She could be 48.
Complaining about demanding MILs is as old as time.
Absolutely correct.

The OP of that thread wrote last week that he has one small child, his wife is currently pregnant, and that he himself has about 30 years to go before retirement. It doesn't sound like his MIL would be anywhere close to being elderly. Common sense should tell you that it defies logic to twist a complaint about a MIL or MIL's in general into a thread about how so many people truly hate the elderly.

But then again, sometimes common sense isn't as common as it should be.
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Old 07-23-2014, 02:33 PM
 
Location: State of Being
35,885 posts, read 67,172,097 times
Reputation: 22373
I think HAPPY was simply using the thread as an "example" and wanted to discuss how folks don't feel any need to be accommodating to the elderly.

Maybe I am wrong, but that is how I took it.

I don't know if folks are, overall, not accommodating to the elderly. I try to be considerate to everyone, regardless of age, unless they are being jerks. Then I don't care how young or old they are . . . I give them a wide berth and go on about my business.

I will say I try to have nice accommodations for guests, but if someone doesn't like my guest room, they are welcome to go stay in a hotel or not come visit me. I no longer visit other people in their homes, myself. I stopped that decades ago. I broke my own rule 2 times in the past decade, and I stayed with a dear friend -- and was very uncomfortable b/c they keep the thermostat on 78. That just reinforced that it is best to stay in a hotel.
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Old 07-23-2014, 02:36 PM
 
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 18,978,143 times
Reputation: 15649
Quote:
Originally Posted by rohirette View Post
I think folks are bringing the MIL baggage to that thread. And maybe the woman was nasty about it, who knows.
I...don't....know about that. When my grandchildren (twins) were born I offered to stay overnight to help them get through the night (the babies, preemies, were really collicky and cried all night) so they could catch at least a few hours sleep. DIL's response (she's 29): Look around, do you see anywhere you can sleep? (their couch was a two-seater, and no guest room). Ya think she'd say thanks, maybe we can get an air mattress? Honestly, so many of these young brides (and by default, their husbands) think the universe revolves around them. So many show so little respect to their elders, who often bend over backward to help them.
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Old 07-23-2014, 02:44 PM
Status: "Support the Mining Law of 1872" (set 10 days ago)
 
Location: Cody, WY
9,581 posts, read 10,926,696 times
Reputation: 19215
Quote:
Originally Posted by anifani821 View Post
I think HAPPY was simply using the thread as an "example" and wanted to discuss how folks don't feel any need to be accommodating to the elderly.

Maybe I am wrong, but that is how I took it.

I don't know if folks are, overall, not accommodating to the elderly. I try to be considerate to everyone, regardless of age, unless they are being jerks. Then I don't care how young or old they are . . . I give them a wide berth and go on about my business.

I will say I try to have nice accommodations for guests, but if someone doesn't like my guest room, they are welcome to go stay in a hotel or not come visit me. I no longer visit other people in their homes, myself. I stopped that decades ago. I broke my own rule 2 times in the past decade, and I stayed with a dear friend -- and was very uncomfortable b/c they keep the thermostat on 78. That just reinforced that it is best to stay in a hotel.
You are correct. But the amount of rage expressed in that thread is extraordinary. Apparently my post did have an ameliorating effect because some subsequent posts showed a marked change.

I must mention that the cuts in Medicare caused by Obamacare were intentional. The writers of that foul piece of legislation were without question a self-appointed Death Committee.

On a lighter note, I must mention that an indoor temperature of 78 would send me running. I can't conceive of sleeping in it.

Addition: I just noticed that they're at it again joking about a bed that repels a MIL. They want us dead.
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Old 07-23-2014, 03:08 PM
 
15,254 posts, read 16,834,158 times
Reputation: 25432
Quote:
Originally Posted by Happy in Wyoming View Post
You are correct. But the amount of rage expressed in that thread is extraordinary. Apparently my post did have an ameliorating effect because some subsequent posts showed a marked change.

I must mention that the cuts in Medicare caused by Obamacare were intentional. The writers of that foul piece of legislation were without question a self-appointed Death Committee.

On a lighter note, I must mention that an indoor temperature of 78 would send me running. I can't conceive of sleeping in it.

Addition: I just noticed that they're at it again joking about a bed that repels a MIL. They want us dead.
Oh good heavens.
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