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Old 08-02-2014, 02:21 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic east coast
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Are there couples on C-D who are happy in their retirement?

Did you work out an equitable way of sharing home duties?

What's your secret to a happy retirement?
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Old 08-02-2014, 02:28 PM
 
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Sure. He does all the things he's enjoyed me doing our entire marriage. I cook and he cleans up, runs the dw and puts dishes away. I'm the computer IT expert and he is the television IT expert. We both food shop though I prefer to do it. I do the laundry and he puts away. We've got it pretty much figured out as to what works.
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Old 08-02-2014, 02:37 PM
 
Location: SW MO
23,605 posts, read 31,487,261 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LittleDolphin View Post
Are there couples on C-D who are happy in their retirement?

Did you work out an equitable way of sharing home duties?

What's your secret to a happy retirement?
Stay healthy! We had always cooperatively shared household chores even before we retired so doing it after retirement came easily. It helped that ours was a relatively late-in-life marriage so we weren't raising children most of the time. Thankfully, we did most things together and especially the cooking which we both enjoy.
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Old 08-02-2014, 02:49 PM
 
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We are happy. He does his thing, and I do mine. The division of labor hasn't changed at all, I still handle the inside of the house(except the floors, he's always handled the cleaning of them), while he takes care the outside and yard. We even cut down to one car, and have managed to do so with absolutely no problems.

My DH retired early, in his 50's. My friends are now seeing the effects of their spouses being home, and aren't taking it well. I think the difference is that they were with fairly demanding men, as in the type expecting three meals a day, and a spotless home. My spouse's standards are a bit less stringent, thank goodness.
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Old 08-02-2014, 02:53 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic east coast
5,371 posts, read 9,865,001 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
We are happy. He does his thing, and I do mine. The division of labor hasn't changed at all, I still handle the inside of the house(except the floors, he's always handled the cleaning of them), while he takes care the outside and yard. We even cut down to one car, and have managed to do so with absolutely no problems.

My DH retired early, in his 50's. My friends are now seeing the effects of their spouses being home, and aren't taking it well. I think the difference is that they were with fairly demanding men, as in the type expecting three meals a day, and a spotless home. My spouse's standards are a bit less stringent, thank goodness.
Sounds as though you've worked it out nicely!
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Old 08-02-2014, 02:59 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic east coast
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Curmudgeon View Post
Stay healthy! We had always cooperatively shared household chores even before we retired so doing it after retirement came easily. It helped that ours was a relatively late-in-life marriage so we weren't raising children most of the time. Thankfully, we did most things together and especially the cooking which we both enjoy.
Absolutley, the stay healthy is paramount...love to see (myself included) all the older people at the gym exercising their bodies -- and about town, riding their bikes, walking their dogs. When we moved to our town 12 years ago, it seemed we were one of the few older couple cycling -- now it's very popular. Very cool! I always say I'd rather wear out than rust out.

And your wife's fortunate...my sweet spouse does not cook...but he's very complmentary about my cooking and helps clean up..and he does his fair share of household stuff such as repairs-- and most especially the mowing (with an electirc push mower -- and we have large yards front and rear)
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Old 08-03-2014, 09:42 AM
 
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
22,592 posts, read 39,962,822 times
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mutual respect ?
being best friends ?
Been through the wringer together ? (30+ yrs of caring for others / disabled parent)
Always having been together? (Farming / traveling / home schooling / building houses and commercial buildings together). We work very well together as we have for all our many yrs. We each had very intense and difficult parents, so grew up with grandparents. I think that is a good IDEA for 'practicing being retired together'! Of course all were farmers, so... plenty of SPACE and mutual help for needs around the farm.

We retired together pre-age 50, and is still a blast, and we each still get plenty of 'alone time', Take separate vacations with siblings and for elder care / volunteer efforts and training, plus PT jobs, One prefers camping, so they do that and we meet-up at various locations thanks to CHEAP airfares.

Soon "we" will be "one", that will be a bit tough without a co-laborer / adventurer. But will have to deal with it. Each can survive pretty well independently. (not sure who is most likely to check out first, both are on borrowed time).
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Old 08-03-2014, 10:45 AM
 
Location: southwest TN
8,225 posts, read 14,934,660 times
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We have always worked cooperatively. While the majority of household chores were my responsibility since he worked and I retired early due to a disability, he never hesitated to jump in and do something that needed to be done without my needing to ask. Our shared philosophy was that we both lived there and maintaining our standards was a shared responsibility.

Now that he has retired, nothing's changed. We still work together doing what needs to be done. He tends to be OCD about some chores and I let him do his thing. We were friends before getting together and 20 years later, we still are friends. Friends discuss issues and work them out...together.
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Old 08-03-2014, 11:18 AM
 
Location: Oregon
1,379 posts, read 2,673,001 times
Reputation: 1019
Quote:
Originally Posted by StealthRabbit View Post
mutual respect ?
being best friends ?
Been through the wringer together ? (30+ yrs of caring for others / disabled parent)
Always having been together? (Farming / traveling / home schooling / building houses and commercial buildings together). We work very well together as we have for all our many yrs. We each had very intense and difficult parents, so grew up with grandparents. I think that is a good IDEA for 'practicing being retired together'! Of course all were farmers, so... plenty of SPACE and mutual help for needs around the farm.

We retired together pre-age 50, and is still a blast, and we each still get plenty of 'alone time', Take separate vacations with siblings and for elder care / volunteer efforts and training, plus PT jobs, One prefers camping, so they do that and we meet-up at various locations thanks to CHEAP airfares.

Soon "we" will be "one", that will be a bit tough without a co-laborer / adventurer. But will have to deal with it. Each can survive pretty well independently. (not sure who is most likely to check out first, both are on borrowed time).
Sorry to hear that soon you will be "one". I admire the way you live your lives to the fullest, it seems. Hope you have a few more good years together, Stealth.
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Old 08-03-2014, 11:28 AM
 
Location: Oregon
1,379 posts, read 2,673,001 times
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We are HAPPY! Adapted fairly well to being together 24/7. We have a few acres, so that gives us some space to get "away" if we need to. As Stealth said above....best friends, and mutual respect. Those are biggies. We travel as much as possible. Mostly, with our travel trailer as we can take our elderly and much loved dog with us.
In our retirement, even tho we moved away from everyone, we seem to have become a "destination" for a lot of family and friends. It's been fun. We have spent more quality time with loved ones than we did when we lived within an hour drive of them.
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