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Old 08-17-2014, 08:21 PM
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,763,041 times
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Originally Posted by Garthur View Post
I have known maybe 50 people that have worked until they were in there late 60's and 70's. The ones that retired only survived and average of 2 years in retirement. Some died within months. Of the remaining people that did not retire and continued to worked they died while still working.

With out hobbies and interests that will allow a fruitful retirement most just give up.

I can not think of any person that retired late and then lived old enough for a good retirement.

Of the people that retired at earlier ages, while they were young enough to reestablish a non working live style with interests and hobbies lived for another 20-30 years.

In the OP case the best choice would be to continue to work
Interesting observations. My theory is that the ones who continued to work did so because they had no outside interests and that's why they died early when they no longer worked. I don't think they died early because they had continued to work.

Or to put it in different words, just vegetating is dangerous to our health and well-being.
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Old 08-17-2014, 09:16 PM
Location: NE Mississippi
13,698 posts, read 8,608,949 times
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Originally Posted by tbill View Post
OK, here is my situation. Will be 67 in Sept., and still working in my 101 year old family retail business. Wife wants me to retire, but I have no hobbies. I work. 90-100 hours per week. Done this for 45 years and only had 2 vacations in those forty years of marriage. That was for our daughters trips to Disneyland and Disney World.
Tried golf, lost interest. Nothing else appeals to even explore. Father lived to age 97, he quit work at age 90 (so I have 23 years left, LOL) Family business will close upon my retirement or death.
I have gone thru the "Hobby" section, but don't see anything that would appeal to me. Looking for ideas...I know-volunteer, but to what. Thanks for any input.
Retirement is over-rated sometimes. And work is not all that bad. You need to be reminded; retirement was only invented recently in human history. What you are doing is greatly preferable to those lives which are devoted to a future retirement.

Do what makes you happy. Consider your family and any needs they may have, but do what makes you happy.
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Old 08-17-2014, 09:19 PM
Location: Out there somewhere...a traveling man.
39,582 posts, read 47,825,261 times
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OP do what makes you happy. But if you want to do something different and away from your current environment for a short time try a cruise to the Caribbean or Alaska or somewhere. That way you can get some clear air thinking while enjoying a fun vacation.
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Old 08-18-2014, 02:57 AM
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for a business owner, work and the business can be life itself. I think your wife might want more of your time or to see you not work 90-100 hours a week. Reducing your hours and transitioning to a more reasonable number of hours might be enough to satisfy her. Do you come home every night for dinner, do you spend any time with her or the kids/grandkids?

Is your health good? Is she perhaps worried about you dying? Some men use work as an excuse to not take care of their health.

Does your wife want a vacation to see kids or grandkids? Do it for her. If you cannot leave the business for even a vacation, it is time to train a manager. Depending on the business, shorten your hours or close for a short period. Restaurants do this all the time when the owner is the chef.

There are many things you can do to blend the needs of your family and maybe age with a continuing business.
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Old 08-18-2014, 04:52 AM
224 posts, read 431,149 times
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Thank you all for your advice! I think all of you are on the money. I took cruises in early 20's after getting out of the Navy, I then went into the family business. Did not have to, but wanted to. Can't hire more people as there isn't enough in it to do that. (Have 22 employees now) Wife is in another state with daughter and grandchildren in the so-called "retirement home" we purchased in 2008. I commute 750 miles back an forth 1 once a month for a few days. I realize that I'm an introvert socially, so making new friends is difficult.

For long-term health, continue working is probably the best, but not what the rest of the family desires. So are you all saying that a hobby for me is a non-issue at the present time?
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Old 08-18-2014, 05:46 AM
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 19,001,270 times
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OP, what if you were to get into a full-time hobby (that maybe includes weekends). Would your wife object to that? IOW, what is the difference between full-time at your business and nearly as many or as many hours filled with hobbies and volunteer work? None, in my opinion. Perhaps your wife feels lonely without you during the week and she could find some hobbies of her own to fill the time. Maybe a 4-day workweek for you and 3 days off for R & R and trips, etc?

Last edited by RiverBird; 08-18-2014 at 06:00 AM..
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Old 08-18-2014, 05:48 AM
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
22,668 posts, read 40,039,994 times
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Originally Posted by tbill View Post
Thank you all for your advice! I think all of you are on the money. ..
For long-term health, continue working is probably the best, but not what the rest of the family desires. So are you all saying that a hobby for me is a non-issue at the present time?
My dad did 82 yrs without a hobby, my Nebraska Pioneer homesteader Grandfather did 94 yrs w/o a hobby. (He did take 2 vacations in the 94 yrs). One was to my wedding when he was 84. The first was in 1948 and his crops were all wiped out by locusts, so he felt he should have stayed home and 'protected them', thus he did from there on out.

I have a best friend age 96. He retired at age 68 and pursued many hobbies (including climbing ALL the 52 peaks in Colorado over 14k, as well as the Grand Teton). (he is much busier than working, and still living alone in 2 story home and driving his Mustang Cobra (outlived spouse by 20+ yrs). He finished building an airplane for a neighbor last yr and got to take it for a flight this yr. (not solo at 96!).

so... hobbies may come, and they may not. Nothing wrong with working in a family business. It s a huge task, no need for hobbies. You have the skills of 30 gov workers who are happy with their pensions and weaving baskets and taking photos. (and checking their account every day to be sure the cherished pension arrives). You have been a marketing expert, an HR person, inventor, sales associate, janitor, finance planner RISK TAKER (don't tell that to the Gov pensioners!), bookkeeper, window washer, delivery person, ... You have been a value to the community and your employees and (lastly) your family. (I missed A LOT of meals to meet payroll (don't tell that to the pensioners))

I am a FIRST generation EMPLOYEE in a history of business owners. Certainly nothing for me to be proud of, A Wimpy paycheck gatherer... I also own 4 businesses, and grew up at 'Dairy Farm Boarding School' BUT... have always felt 'safer' as a stinking grunt employee. It has had it's merit, and I have taken much risk and added patents and inventions and terrific value for my employer. I have had 3 long-term foreign assignments and 26 different positions. so... not just burning daylight in the factory waiting to 'clock-out'. (I worked nights for 30 yrs so I could farm and homeschool. + no bosses (or dayshift whiners) at night (more time to do hobbies)!

Consider things you can enjoy apart from work (in case you are injured or disabled), but hopefully you will endure and contribute at your passion for many more yrs.

be sure to take care of yourself (and others). By being a business leader, you are doing that. When / if you desire to leave employment, you will also fill that gap in the lives of others.

Mentoring goes a long ways and your company deserves a succession plan. Do it, act on it, embrace it, nurture it. You may also enjoy it and learn something new about YOU!

Leave a community legacy. A pensioner might struggle with that concept...or they may have embraced earlier or later in life. Many finally 'find-themselves' in the comfort of their retirement, and they are able to look outside the curtains and contribute to the community, now that they are finally secure and well cared for themselves. Most (not all) business owners have a 40 yr head-start on that worthwhile contribution. Every little bit helps someone else, and fortunately we seldom know who that someone is! (Likely many of your employees and students from yrs ago)!
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Old 08-18-2014, 06:17 AM
Location: Currently living in Reddit
5,655 posts, read 5,708,386 times
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Question for the OP - what was the thinking behind buying the "retirement home" six years ago? What changed since then?

On the surface, it sounds like the rest of the family wants a life with their dad/grandad and who can really blame them? And that you are convinced the business dies whenever you decide to call it quits - which is an extremely difficult thing to deal with.

So what's the middle ground? Possibly sell the "retirement home" and have the family move back towards you, then you, in turn, spend more time with them? Seems like you're at an impasse that is going to require a lot of compromise to solve.
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Old 08-18-2014, 06:23 AM
Location: Whereever we have our RV parked
8,831 posts, read 7,728,859 times
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If you're happy, keep working. If you retire, you'll just get depressed. Not only that but retirement could bring on a whole lot of other physical problems. You know yourself best. Do what you want, not what your wife wants. My fil was like your dad. Worked most of his life till about 92 and died at 96. Placate the wife with a couple more vacations, if you can stand it. Or send her to visit family, or send her on some of those bus trips for the old ladies.
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Old 08-18-2014, 07:17 AM
3,492 posts, read 4,964,923 times
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Originally Posted by Happy in Wyoming View Post
You have the life that makes you happy. Enjoy it. You can be very proud of yourself and your family for running a century-old successful business.

Some people have hobbies that they really enjoy, but they found them naturally; they didn't desperately seek something to kill time. It seems that your business is your perfect hobby as well as your line of work.
This guy (or gal) managed to be happy in Wyoming, so it can be done anywhere. Maybe he (or she) can see the Grand Tetons though, which would be pretty nice. Otherwise that's gotta be one of the most depressing states. (Okay, second to New Jersey)
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