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Old 09-09-2014, 08:05 PM
 
6,315 posts, read 3,578,007 times
Reputation: 22096

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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrRational View Post
But if you're involved with -living a life with- -sharing a home and laundry basket with-
someone who then has a medical condition arise which requires effort beyond making
a pot of chicken soup to remedy... choices that transcend money will have to be made.

Having something to base those choices on clearly articulated in advance will help.
You mean something like, If you get an expensive terminal illness I'm out the door? Good luck with that.
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Old 09-09-2014, 08:15 PM
 
Location: The Triad (NC)
28,501 posts, read 62,182,463 times
Reputation: 32182
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lodestar View Post
You mean something like, If you get an expensive terminal illness I'm out the door?
I mean having that sort of discussion and making whatever choices you are both comfortable with.
Of course it would probably be phrased with less animosity. Well I hope it would.

The point being that beyond the MONEY aspect of treatment explored earlier...
there is also the time and energy aspect of support and just how much of a martyr you're
willing to expect this person you profess to care about to commit to being.

I'm trying to voice this without drawing lines but being very clear that the lines exist
and that actually mature adults should be prepared to have those tough discussions.
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Old 09-10-2014, 06:14 AM
 
Location: Coastal Georgia
37,124 posts, read 45,641,400 times
Reputation: 61761
Part of the reason older folks would want to partner up is so they will have each other to rely on as they encounter the inevitable health issues, and to be good company for each other. Just because I wouldn't want to have my savings depleted by a partner's care, doesn't mean I wouldn't be there for him to love and support him. It's not cold hearted, it's just math.
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Old 09-10-2014, 04:13 PM
 
Location: Las Vegas
13,888 posts, read 25,327,549 times
Reputation: 26385
If we are legally room mates there is nothing that precludes me from paying for his care. But I am not legally bound to lose more than 1/2 of what I have to pay for his care. Or spend down my own retirement nest egg to a certain level so he can get some kind of subsidized help. And of course the same is true if the roles are reversed. He could not be forced to lose his financial viability to pay for my illness. Plus there is the monthly penalty of receiving less Social Security.

The more I learn about this the more marriage penalties I am finding. I am kind of surprised the penalties are this steep/severe. You would think the government would want to be proponents of living arrangements that allow seniors to live independently longer. In a way, they are forcing us to 'shack up' instead of doing the more conventional thing and getting married.
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Old 09-11-2014, 07:30 AM
 
Location: Eastern UP of Michigan
1,202 posts, read 682,799 times
Reputation: 1271
My husband and I (same sex) just got married after 40 years together.

There really were few benefits of doing so, that for the most part could not be overcome with POAs, wills, trusts etc. As our lawyer explained, there were actually some financial negatives in doing so.

About the only benefits will be from whether we elect a spousal annuity from his Civil Service pension(he is already retired) and that I can now tag onto his healthcare if I choose to retire earlier than 65-66.

Guess we are just a bit old fashioned.
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Old 09-11-2014, 07:33 AM
 
223 posts, read 274,669 times
Reputation: 443
While the information in the summary of this article may be correct, the typos and grammatical errors are atrocious! If this weren't posted on a government website, I'd be tempted to believe that the information was incorrect.
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Old 09-11-2014, 11:47 AM
 
Location: USA
1,815 posts, read 2,243,650 times
Reputation: 4139
Quote:
Originally Posted by yellowsnow View Post
The more I learn about this the more marriage penalties I am finding. I am kind of surprised the penalties are this steep/severe. You would think the government would want to be proponents of living arrangements that allow seniors to live independently longer. In a way, they are forcing us to 'shack up' instead of doing the more conventional thing and getting married.

There are all kinds of marriage penalties -- not just for those 60 and over.

A married couple, both working, with children, pay more in taxes then a couple "shacked up" with children (earned income credit, head of household credit to name a few).
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Old 09-11-2014, 11:52 AM
 
8,858 posts, read 5,136,100 times
Reputation: 10129
Quote:
Originally Posted by JIMANDTHOM View Post
My husband and I (same sex) just got married after 40 years together.

There really were few benefits of doing so, that for the most part could not be overcome with POAs, wills, trusts etc. As our lawyer explained, there were actually some financial negatives in doing so.

About the only benefits will be from whether we elect a spousal annuity from his Civil Service pension(he is already retired) and that I can now tag onto his healthcare if I choose to retire earlier than 65-66.

Guess we are just a bit old fashioned.
It's awesome that you finally have the option.
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Old 09-11-2014, 12:30 PM
 
Location: SW Florida
9,759 posts, read 7,038,572 times
Reputation: 14295
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheMartianChick View Post
While the information in the summary of this article may be correct, the typos and grammatical errors are atrocious! If this weren't posted on a government website, I'd be tempted to believe that the information was incorrect.
Apparently the bureaucrat proofreader (Verbal Manager) was on vacation when this came out!
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Old 09-11-2014, 01:23 PM
 
1,214 posts, read 1,355,980 times
Reputation: 1908
Quote:
Originally Posted by JIMANDTHOM View Post
My husband and I (same sex) just got married after 40 years together.

There really were few benefits of doing so, that for the most part could not be overcome with POAs, wills, trusts etc. As our lawyer explained, there were actually some financial negatives in doing so.

About the only benefits will be from whether we elect a spousal annuity from his Civil Service pension(he is already retired) and that I can now tag onto his healthcare if I choose to retire earlier than 65-66.

Guess we are just a bit old fashioned.

I wish you many years of good health and happiness.
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