Children that can't wait for inheritance money (fighting, betray, friend)
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Very sorry for your loss. I was a executor in VA. Don't know how CA is but we had to inform persons named in the will as to the statis. They could request the accounting of the will. But I'm sure it could also be discussed off the record between siblings .
Again sorry for your loss.
Thank you. My sister finally got up the gumption to ask. And my other sister was fine sharing what we knew. We still felt weird asking. Our parents were pretty open about how the will was written. We just didn't know how much money was going to be split. It was uncomfortable enough asking AFTER they died. I could never fathom asking before!
Am aware of a situation that actually worked out well. One sib had borrowed money over the years from a relative when other sib hadn't. Relative always said that borrowed money would come off first when splitting the estate. Turned out after the relative died, found out that he had set up two bank accounts with his name and each sibs name on one. The difference in the accounts made up the difference of what had been borrowed over the years. Took care of that problem upfront so they could split the rest down the middle as planned.
Am aware of a situation that actually worked out well. One sib had borrowed money over the years from a relative when other sib hadn't. Relative always said that borrowed money would come off first when splitting the estate. Turned out after the relative died, found out that he had set up two bank accounts with his name and each sibs name on one. The difference in the accounts made up the difference of what had been borrowed over the years. Took care of that problem upfront so they could split the rest down the middle as planned.
That's a nice way of handling it. We have one sister who has been a financial drain on our parents for decades. She's still getting a equal cut like the rest of us.
Without going into all the details. My sister-in-law and her husband have for years been kind of hinting/waiting around impatiently for a inheritance of about $200K from a 88 year old living parent. That is before the parent is even deceased. Its a nice gift to receive something, but I can't stand the way they act now about it.
Anyone run into this kind of thing. I would like to give them a piece of my mind.
Some people just forget that as long as a person is alive, what they own belongs to them, not to others. Kids are not entitled to an inheritance - they do not own the assets yet.
The parent owns the assets and has the right to decide what happens. It could be spent/consumed, gifted away, or whatever is in that parent's Will.
If a child has some reason to want the assets early, they of course can ask the parent, but it is ultimately the parent's choice.
Also, a parent who gifts assets away either to charity or to their children or other family members needs to have Long-Term Care coverage for at least 5 years after the gift is made. The rules of Medicaid are very strict - if a parent gives assets to kids while still alive and then needs nursing or in-home care within 5 years of the gift, they will be unable to get Medicaid to cover it. Nursing home bills for a one-year stay at the end-of-life (fairly common) can easily run to $75,000 or even in some cases $100,000. A slightly longer stay or a stay in a "nicer" nursing home with more amenities or a higher staff: patient ratio can end up near $200,000 although that is less common.
I helped an elderly woman for several years who told me that her only surviving niece had once said (about her assets), "One day this will all be mine." She also had a nephew, but, even though he lived in the same town, rarely, if ever visited. She fell one time and they both showed-up ... after first stopping by her attorney's office to check on the estate!
Unknown to them, she set-up her $million+ estate to be divided among five charities/ministries. She only left about $50K to each of her two remaining relatives. They were not very 'happy campers', but, actually got about $50K more than they deserved.
I helped an elderly woman for several years who told me that her only surviving niece had once said (about her assets), "One day this will all be mine." She also had a nephew, but, even though he lived in the same town, rarely, if ever visited. She fell one time and they both showed-up ... after first stopping by her attorney's office to check on the estate!
Unknown to them, she set-up her $million+ estate to be divided among five charities/ministries. She only left about $50K to each of her two remaining relatives. They were not very 'happy campers', but, actually got about $50K more than they deserved.
Interesting story, JG. And I agree with the last sentence about the niece and nephew getting more than they deserved. It's incredible how crude and crass some people can be.
Without going into all the details. My sister-in-law and her husband have for years been kind of hinting/waiting around impatiently for a inheritance of about $200K from a 88 year old living parent. That is before the parent is even deceased. Its a nice gift to receive something, but I can't stand the way they act now about it.
Anyone run into this kind of thing. I would like to give them a piece of my mind.
Seriously, in a case like that, I would totally give them my mind. Try to persuade them gently, but if they don't stop, go ahead and dump your mind on them as if you were applying the ice-bucket challenge .
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