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Old 01-19-2015, 06:31 PM
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,485 posts, read 43,795,280 times
Reputation: 47259


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Old 01-19-2015, 06:51 PM
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,747,361 times
Reputation: 32309
That was funny! Thanks for posting it.

On the more serious side, I wonder what percentage of people over, say, 80 give up driving on their own at an appropriate time and what percentage ignore the urgings of their adult children and perhaps others in a stubborn delusional belief that they are still fine with driving. (I do not mean to imply that everyone over 80 needs to give up driving - I am wondering about the subset of people over 80 who are truly impaired).

I know a lady who is an example of the former, and I applaud her rationality. She is about 86 or 87 and has macular degeneration. She had given up driving at night a few years ago, and decided about six months ago that it was time to give it up totally. Her life is a lot less convenient now, but she contributed to her own safety and that of other road users.

We've all heard stories of the stubborn ones, whose adult children are sometimes frantic about how to force the issue. My own mother continued to drive past the point where my sister and I were concerned, but finally gave it up on her own before we had to play hardball about it.
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Old 01-19-2015, 09:06 PM
4,069 posts, read 1,560,196 times
Reputation: 7411
I'll quit driving when you pry my cold dead fingers off the steering wheel.
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Old 01-19-2015, 10:00 PM
Location: Boca Raton, FL
5,176 posts, read 8,699,926 times
Reputation: 6199
Smile Hmmmm....

Didn't know my FIL knew how to post! (That's a joke!) (Above post)

He's 92 and yup, he doesn't drive as much as he used to but oh boy.....it's a problem.
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Old 01-19-2015, 10:09 PM
10,818 posts, read 8,069,111 times
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Funny picture, serious subject.
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Old 01-19-2015, 10:33 PM
Location: Southwest Washington State
21,899 posts, read 14,397,959 times
Reputation: 30791
This is serious problem for families. We went through this with my mom who insisted on driving until a doctor told her she could no longer do so. I sat in her car as she drove (she always insisted on driving her car) a year or two before she quit driving and I had serious misgivings, but I told myself that she was probably OK, since she drove slowly.

But some of the signs were, the inability to give a blinker signal and turn; pulling into an intersection so she would "have enough time" to turn left; feeling stress with any thing out of the ordinary to the point where she would make a wide turn practically hitting the shoulder.

With my mom there were vision problems, but the main thing I noticed were her slow reflexes and her upset over small things as she drove. Driving clearly stressed her, but she insisted on doing it anyway.

If I live that long, I hope I will recognize the signs and take myself off the road. I might have to move though. Where I have moved is not a good place for public transportation. But at that point, I guess I will be a candidate for Independent Living or an ALf. I hope this doesn't happen for a long, long time.
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Old 01-20-2015, 05:55 AM
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,485 posts, read 43,795,280 times
Reputation: 47259
My mother had problems and I told her she should not be driving any more. We went to the doctor for complete check up and doc said "Give her keys back and always be with her to point out any problems" - oh good she will kill us both instead of just herself and any other innocents on the road!

I decided to let her drive home from the doc. We ended up in a ditch and damage to the car. I took her keys away right then. Her dementia (loss of spatial perspective is a real sign) became really obvious and progressively worse until she decided I had stolen her car from her.
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Old 01-20-2015, 06:09 AM
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I was so grateful when my mother decided for herself to stop driving at night. She does fine in daylight.
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Old 01-20-2015, 06:16 AM
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Very difficult emotionally to give up the independence, and having to rely on others. There are many who don't have a support group and are pretty much left to their own resources to get around.

Yes, there are taxis, public transportation, and asking a neighbor. Some senior complexes offer 'scheduled' transportation.

As far as buying groceries/home product supplies: one can use a taxi service, but you then need to wait upwards of 40 minutes for them to pick you back up; same with scheduled transportation at sr. apts. If you use public transportation, many have strict rules that you can only take on the bus what you can carry on your lap. Not saying it can't be done, but it takes planning.

If you live in an extreme weather area, you can't walk in the snow or on the ice to get to the grocery store, even if it's just a block away.

I would imagine that if you live in a sr. apt complex, those tenants who still drive may be willing to drive you to the store; doctor appts; library; etc., if you slipped them some money for their time and gasoline.

For myself, eyesight is the number one culprit, and when the DMV says, "Nix", well, that's it. My reflexes are still good, thankfully. I keep telling myself that it will happen at some point, and I try to convince myself of the positives: no more expenses for car maintenance; gasoline; car tags; car insurance. Am hoping that mindset works when the time comes.
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Old 01-20-2015, 06:31 AM
Location: in the miseries
3,302 posts, read 3,581,865 times
Reputation: 3810
My father quit driving at 93' but not willingly.
He hit someone. His fault. No injuries TG.

I knew nothing about it and the next day he drove to my house
to inform me I had to take his keys away.
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