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Old 01-21-2015, 07:00 PM
Location: Montana
1,754 posts, read 1,657,002 times
Reputation: 5951


I am not quite retired (6 months out), but my two sisters are. We have paid for my brother's chemo treatments, end of life care, and final expenses because he literally had NO money, and his widow is now living on $1500 per month.

Wasn't a loan, but it was a fairly expensive proposition for the three of us over the last year - but yes, I would do the same thing every time.

Loaning my brother money? No. Covering expenses to help with end of life/extending life? Absolutely!
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Old 01-21-2015, 07:05 PM
14,264 posts, read 24,009,233 times
Reputation: 20092
Originally Posted by Gandalara View Post
Have been asked by a nephew.
Since my parents died, the nephew thinks I'm rich and I am now considered the Bank of Gandalara.

I told him sure, no problem - with a signed contract at 15% interest. With his Toys put in my garage as collateral.
He hasn't asked again.

You determined intent. (g)
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Old 01-25-2015, 10:03 PM
Location: Southwest Washington State
21,907 posts, read 14,406,502 times
Reputation: 30827
I have never been asked for a loan. Ever.
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Old 01-25-2015, 11:07 PM
48,516 posts, read 83,978,960 times
Reputation: 18050
Not by retired friends or relatives but I am not closed to it depending on reason needed. I might even give it to them not as a loan.
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Old 01-26-2015, 12:50 AM
Location: Cochise county, AZ
4,979 posts, read 3,466,540 times
Reputation: 10513
That's very sweet tex.
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Old 01-29-2015, 02:09 PM
Location: Tennessee
34,694 posts, read 33,709,656 times
Reputation: 51934
I'm going to guess that the same people who asked when you retired asked before you retired, too.
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Old 01-30-2015, 07:01 AM
491 posts, read 598,538 times
Reputation: 2095
I've never been asked, but when 2 of my sibling's spouses died I offered to loan them small(under2k) amounts of money to help out right at the time. Both paid me back within a year, so it was no big deal.
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Old 01-30-2015, 09:46 AM
Location: Idaho
1,455 posts, read 1,157,295 times
Reputation: 5503
Originally Posted by old_cold View Post
Yes, with the understanding that they'd be changing their habits so this kind of situation wouldn't happen again
That was exactly the condition we set for one of our relatives when we bailed her out 10 years ago. She was facing losing her home due to unpaid property taxes. She also had 10K in credit card debt. We went through her spending habits and made specific suggestions before providing her with the loan (notarized promissory note with scheduled payments).

Although she had not paid us back a dime, we consider the loan a kind of 'life-changing gift' because she had made some major changes such as stopping the girls-weekend-night-out feeding the slot machines, stopping the cellphone services, removing HBO from the cable menu etc.

We have done both giving and getting loans from relatives and friends. We got a small loan from our PIL to have 20% down payment from our first home, and another from my sister for the second home (while waiting for to sell the 1st one). We paid back the loans within a year (lots of peanut butter sandwiches, home-grown vegetables and thrift-store shopping!).

Our experience with more than half dozen loans to others is that you could pretty much predict the chance of getting paid back based on the circumstances of the loans. All the loans for opening business practices or meeting 20% mortgage down payments have always been paid back well before the due dates. The two loans which did not get paid back were bailing-out-of-debt cases! In both cases (included the one I mentioned before), we knew that there would be a very slim chance of ever getting back a penny but we felt it was necessary to help our relatives.

Bottom line is that we do not subscribe to the sentiment expressed in Shakespeare' Hamlet quote below. Even though we had some 'bad' loans. We consider the loans to be good deeds. They strengthened relationships and gave both loaners and borrowers life encouragement that we could always count on each other.

"Neither a borrower nor a lender be;
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man."
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