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Old 01-28-2015, 06:08 AM
13,348 posts, read 25,607,620 times
Reputation: 20613


But she might go with you, Volosong? That's pretty personal! I hope for the best for both of you.
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Old 01-28-2015, 06:23 AM
40 posts, read 42,803 times
Reputation: 83
[quote=volosong;38205103]You, brightdoglover, and myself must be kindred spirits. We seem to be the same type of people.

Everybody's comments have been very helpful. They really are! They have helped to identify some of the things that are subconsciously tugging at me. And, that I'm "normal" and these are "normal" feelings. I did a real quick re-calculation of my net worth this morning and I'm in better shape than I thought I was.

BUT . . . I can't believe that you would do such a cruel thing to your doggies. How could you do such a terrible thing?


Volosong -- I'm not sure if you were pointing to me here since you quoted from me and referred to the doggies ??

At any rate, I can identify with your ladyfriend. I come from teaching and know the backstabbing culture all too well. I believe this happens because, in many schools, teachers are forced to be competitive with one another, so my downfall is another's triumph.

My guess about your ladyfriend -- she'd marry you in a heartbeat and it would *improve* your already great friendship.

If you haven't at least discussed the possibility, I'd highly recommend that you do -- nothing like good old-fashioned communication.
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Old 01-29-2015, 02:49 PM
Location: Finally escaped The People's Republic of California
11,120 posts, read 7,578,248 times
Reputation: 6218
I have 200 days to go, I'll turn 55 and retire on the same day. I also plan to move that day. Actually I hope to be moved out of state before then. I have lots of vacation to use but the rules state I must work my last day.
No feeling of anxiety here. I'm counting down the days, and trying to maximize my time away from work. The future looks fun.......
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Old 01-29-2015, 06:50 PM
Location: DFW - Coppell / Las Colinas
32,073 posts, read 36,715,658 times
Reputation: 38776
At 62 I'm seriously nervous about winding down a good career over the next 2-3 years. So far the plans are to get an RV, sell the house and hit the road to see the US. I'd love to go somewhere for 1-4 weeks to see the area and then wander off to other locales. There are so many places I've never been.

My 53 YO GF still has a 13 YO daughter at home so she may need to keep working till she can get the DD off to college. Maybe in 4-5 years she'll be ready to join me for a life on the road.

Remember when you left your parents house with all your possessions in the back of a car ? That's my goal but they will be stored in my house on wheels.

My father died at 64. I ask myself why wait the last few years. Tough decisions.
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Old 01-29-2015, 08:54 PM
14,275 posts, read 24,033,616 times
Reputation: 20111
I started to think about retirement in October 2012 when the company that I was managing was sold to a private equity firm. However, I had signed a contract to remain with the new company for six months. It was a very stressful six months as the new company was very disorganized and poorly managed.

My DW was very concerned thinking that I would probably keel over from not working and was questioning as to whether we had adequate means to retire. She wanted to bring in "financial experts" until I reminded her that I could do the analysis myself. I have to admit that some of the details - especially health care - was stressful.

I ended up retiring in May 2013. We tool a 10 day vacation in Traverse City, MI and I started planning to relocate "somewhere". We narrowed down the choices to three locations - Delaware, E. Kentucky and E. Tennessee. I planned trips to each of these locations and had planned to make a move in 2015 or 2016.

As for post-retirement, I can honestly say that I was really afraid that I would be a couch potato. However, I kept very busy and had something to do all the time.

In 2015, we ended up relocating to AZ after a two month trip. After two weeks of a two month snowbird vacation, my wife declared, "this is the place."

My wife has two more weeks until she retires at age 56. As for me, I have had to start keeping a calendar as there are tons of things to do in this area. I volunteer 12-20 hours per week in Tucson at a museum and a high school. This was stuff that I always wanted to do BUT "never had the time."
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Old 01-30-2015, 05:22 AM
526 posts, read 510,708 times
Reputation: 493
I think the most difficult thing about any decision is the feeling we all experience of a bit of uncertainty. I know that I am aware that everything we do is a part of a greater experience. If a person marries and has children with another person, it changes the world forever for everyone. Those children then perpetuate what will happen in the world, and so on and so on down through history. If that original person could go back in time and marry another person and have children with that person, again, the world is changed. This holds true for lesser actions as well. The people who decided one morning in Sydney to go or not to go to a certain cafe for a bite to eat...

So it is with important decisions such as retirement. I know that I could not wait to retire. After over four decades of teaching in inner city schools, I needed a change. I have lots of wonderful interests, a a great imagination and a bent for adventure so I knew that there were lovely things awaiting. I also was a bit fearful because people kept warning me to make sure my time was scheduled, filled up and regimented. My husband on the other hand, was so filled with negative feelings about retiring, it was unbelievable. I know exactly what he was thinking because he expressed it each and every day. He felt he would have no worth in society, he felt he would be pigeonholed by others who would call him old, he had lots of feelings and they were all honestly expressed and, my goodness, it was sad to listen to but I listened and understood. I must tell you that now, a year and a half later he is SO happy he retired. He is so happy he no longer has to be dropped off at that bus stop at 5:45 a.m. while I go to the neighborhood of my school and sit freezing in my car for 1 1/2 hours until they open the school so I can go in and start to thaw out.

The mistake we have been making is an amusing one. For the past year and a half we have run around so much that we exhausted ourselves. We literally never sat for even a day at home. These past few weeks we decided to stay in one place and see what that was like. The result? We LOVE it. It's just as much fun "vacationing" in place as it is running around. I can't recall a time in my life when I wasn't regimented into getting up and going to school and taking lessons of some sort or other: music, art, drama, gardening, professional development...you name it, we've all done this. Now, finally, retirement allows us the freedom to do absolutely NOTHING! It's almost as though we have all be so busy, "getting and spending," that we don't know how to accept the wonderful fruit of our labors.

To the OP and to everyone who is frightened by this or any other decision, I say, "Relax, you're in for the time of your life!"

To anyone out there who is suffering while waiting to retire, don't hate your present life or work situation. Make an honest effort to enjoy things. Somehow, when you are happy, time has a way of slipping away and before you know it, you will have achieved your goal. We all get there, you may as well enjoy the journey!
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Old 01-30-2015, 04:26 PM
5,432 posts, read 3,464,353 times
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I was not scared at all. I was extremely relieved to not have to work anymore and not be obligated to go into an office every day!! And to escape commuting!

I was also glad to get away from supervisors and certain employees!

I also knew that it is easy for me to happily occupy myself and my mind on my own without structured work. And enjoy pursuing many interests.

For some reason, I wasn't fearful of change in finances. (even though I live on Social Security plus savings)
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