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Old 03-22-2015, 10:10 AM
 
5,356 posts, read 7,243,630 times
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If you end up in a similar state to your in-laws at some point in the future, what would you want your relatives to do or not do for you - that may give you insight as to what you should do for them now with a clear conscience. I'm not implying any particular answer here, it just may help clarify what your principles and expectations are for yourself.
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Old 03-22-2015, 10:34 AM
 
Location: Earth, a nice neighborhood in the Milky Way
2,557 posts, read 1,614,895 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Curmudgeon View Post
It's to preclude the parents from becoming burdens on the state. Never mind the phony disability claims and chronic unemployed.
I understand the motivation of the state. I don't understand the constitutional basis for it.
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Old 03-22-2015, 10:41 AM
 
Location: SW MO
23,605 posts, read 31,542,742 times
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Originally Posted by ormari View Post
I understand the motivation of the state. I don't understand the constitutional basis for it.
The 10th Amendment: Powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States are reserved to the States, respectively, or to the people.
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Old 03-22-2015, 12:52 PM
 
Location: middle tennessee
1,927 posts, read 996,754 times
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if you live in a state with filial responsibility statutes where the state medicaid system is going under, you might be held responsible for your parent's health care debt.

Federal law speaks to the responsibility of the spouse, but my state (and others) hold children responsible, although I believe it is rarely enforced unless evidence of fraud such as transfer of assets can be shown.

It is difficult. I understand and am not critical of the decisions people make. It still makes me sad. I hope I have things arranged so that my children will not have to wrestle with this issue.
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Old 03-22-2015, 12:57 PM
 
Location: SW MO
23,605 posts, read 31,542,742 times
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Originally Posted by boogie'smom View Post
It is difficult. I understand and am not critical of the decisions people make. It still makes me sad. I hope I have things arranged so that my children will not have to wrestle with this issue.
My children have been saddled with self-imposed responsibility for their mother who is in a memory loss facility due to dementia and has been for going-on six years. Even my wife and I have chipped-in to ease the childrens' burden. I have sworn that I will not become a burden on them and will do whatever it takes to follow through with that vow.
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Old 03-22-2015, 01:48 PM
 
Location: Earth, a nice neighborhood in the Milky Way
2,557 posts, read 1,614,895 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Curmudgeon View Post
The 10th Amendment: Powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States are reserved to the States, respectively, or to the people.
Fine, but I invoke the 9th Amendment...

The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.

I am aware of some of the history regarding the applicability of the 9th Amendment.

I know I will get flak for this.

I personally find the way the medical system deals with death and dying in this country to be one big scam. People are afraid to die, and we "help" them prolong their lives at great expense for very little benefit in a great many cases. There is little effort made on the part of the medical community to determine whether a person can afford such care. And if you can pass the bills of to someone else, well why not do that procedure?
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Old 03-22-2015, 02:09 PM
 
Location: Earth, a nice neighborhood in the Milky Way
2,557 posts, read 1,614,895 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boogie'smom View Post
if you live in a state with filial responsibility statutes where the state medicaid system is going under, you might be held responsible for your parent's health care debt.

Federal law speaks to the responsibility of the spouse, but my state (and others) hold children responsible, although I believe it is rarely enforced unless evidence of fraud such as transfer of assets can be shown.

It is difficult. I understand and am not critical of the decisions people make. It still makes me sad. I hope I have things arranged so that my children will not have to wrestle with this issue.
People playing games to hide assets sounds like defrauding the government for sure.

Hey, life is sad. Good for you for being conscientious enough to think through how things are arranged. Too few parents do so.
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Old 03-22-2015, 02:19 PM
 
39,329 posts, read 20,433,961 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boogie'smom View Post
if you live in a state with filial responsibility statutes where the state medicaid system is going under, you might be held responsible for your parent's health care debt.

Federal law speaks to the responsibility of the spouse, but my state (and others) hold children responsible, although I believe it is rarely enforced unless evidence of fraud such as transfer of assets can be shown.

It is difficult. I understand and am not critical of the decisions people make. It still makes me sad. I hope I have things arranged so that my children will not have to wrestle with this issue.
Yes my state has the filial law and I am scared to death of it. My mother was able to pay her bills but nothing left, now she has to get help and they will go after her home when she is gone, we don't care but medical bills can quickly eat that up. If they come after us it can destroy our ability to take care of our selves when we are older.

What makes me sick is if a person isn't responsible throughout their lives and have nothing the government pays for everything even some home care to keep them home and no recovery, the kids aren't threatened either.
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Old 03-22-2015, 02:23 PM
 
39,329 posts, read 20,433,961 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Howard Roark View Post
I'm kind of torn on this issue because I lost my mom to cancer when I was 35 and my dad also to cancer when I was 40. I miss them. I owe my success to them.

It's hypothetical but what if they were still alive but in terrible shape? My mom was a homemaker and my dad a disabled veteran. Their house was paid off. My mom had just about zero benefits when she died. The hospital bill was $70,000 for her tragic one month sudden illness My dad had 24/7 home care up until he passed. He would have benefits - being a disabled veteran.

It's an issue that is common to many people. Also caring for adult children who are unemployed - well my oldest sister does that.

I made a point to design my life so that I would be as little a burden as possible. I buy LTC insurance, have no debt, and my bond income pays for the roof over my head. I set aside a lot of savings that will really keep me going for years. Also set up a deal with TreasuryDirect through my savings institution to feed money back into T-bills. So that a relative on my account can have easy access to my money spread out balanced over a year to take care of the rest of my financial needs in case i'm incapacitated (I'm now starting to move into two year notes).
Yes I understand your being torn on the issue. My mother made it through a stroke and respiratory arrest. We are thankful that she is still with us but it is causing so much stress on me and my brother. We have a choice, give up our own lives to take care of them or get some help and go broke.
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Old 03-22-2015, 03:53 PM
 
Location: SW MO
23,605 posts, read 31,542,742 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ormari View Post
Fine, but I invoke the 9th Amendment...

The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.
The key is, "the people" and by extension, rights passed into law by their chosen and elected representatives. But this is neither the thread nor the forum for a Constitutional discussion so I'm done.
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