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Old 04-01-2015, 01:10 PM
 
Location: North Beach, MD on the Chesapeake
33,883 posts, read 42,105,179 times
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As a tangent, many older people suffer some severe issues when they go to the "home", either assisted living or intensive nursing.

Why? Because they don't have their "stuff" with them. I saw that with my mother, my brother wouldn't let her take even a quilt with her. She hated that place even though we bought a lot of her stuff at the auction and gave it back to her. It got better when she had some of her "stuff".
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Old 04-01-2015, 01:58 PM
 
Location: UpstateNY
8,612 posts, read 8,299,445 times
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^^^Yep, when grandma went to the ALF she had a lot of nice pieces go, too. It really did feel like home.

I like my stuff but I also want a cleaner house, and a lot of stuff means a lot of washing and dusting. I can enjoy my swung vase collection of ten just much as when it was thirty. And no more John Deere collectibles for the DH!
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Old 04-01-2015, 04:11 PM
 
26,589 posts, read 52,277,138 times
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He collects tractors... me too.

Current is a CAT D3 Dozer, Deere 350 C Dozer, Deere 110 TLB, Kubota L3800, Kubota BX23 and can't forget my ride on Craftsman Mower...

Guess I'm one of those people that could be happy living in a barn or warehouse... ;-)
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Old 04-01-2015, 05:29 PM
 
Location: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
9,207 posts, read 8,293,143 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CCc girl View Post
LOL herons! I can't wait to haunt the consignment stores and auction houses in Palm Beach county!
If you add another sofa to the other end, that looks just like my mother's sofa.

She's had it recovered at least four times through the years and it is still comfortable as heck!

Wow! Is that currently in a Palm Beach County consignment store?
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Old 04-02-2015, 10:55 AM
 
3,196 posts, read 1,813,913 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GRACE2829 View Post
Ok, I have many collectibles and went to a local "antique roadshow" at a local golf course lase year.
The reality is that anything related to a dining room (china, crystal, glass) or anything related to tools that do anything are of no value. No one even wants a dining room anymore... hardly need the kitchen. Military items, auto/car items, weapons, etc. are the real valuables.
Your 'antique roadshow' was just a group of itinerant hucksters looking for a quick buck. Their word meant nothing.
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Old 04-02-2015, 11:15 AM
 
3,196 posts, read 1,813,913 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newenglandgirl View Post
Standing with one of my sisters in my mother's empty house (our childhood home) before she moved to the next house at 90, we looked around in despair. All I can say is TG she did not have an attic and was not a packrat. If she were, I would have packed up and headed for the hills. As it was, she had four bedrooms full of heavy maple beds with the metal springs, mattresses that weighed a ton, dressers that weighed a ton, recliners that could have served as forts, and a sleeper couch that looked "modern" but weighed so much it took six men to move it. Heavy drapery, dark rooms.

She had never thought of downsizing, the word would have been incomprehensible to her. She used to delight in saying we kids would have to deal with it all some day. Unfortunately, to this day I define my mother (partly) as a rather fearful, "fixed" woman who could not let go. I still see that house and all its heaviness in my dreams. If she had had a life outside her home all this would not have mattered so much, but she defined herself by her house. Sad.

So...as a reaction, I want to be lightweight with air and sunlight and easily moveable possessions. I'm not there yet, but that's what I have in mind as a goal by the time I'm in my 70s. I'll preserve the things worth preserving for the family, but these will not be heavy and take up space. I guess I'd better get on it, lol.
I'm sorry, this post makes me sad.

Your mother lived with her house the way she liked it, for many good years. Like you said, she wasn't a pack rat or hoarder, with tons of junk to dispose of. She had actual substantial furniture (gasp!) which she enjoyed, and all you can do is grouse over how much it all weighed when you spent a couple of days getting rid of it?! Do you really feel that she should have 'downsized' to make the week after she moved a little bit less work for you? How about YOU let go of your idea that your mother should have sacrificed her happiness in her old age to follow your selfish demands on her lifestyle.

Sad.

Last edited by rugrats2001; 04-02-2015 at 11:47 AM..
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Old 04-02-2015, 11:46 AM
 
9,680 posts, read 15,858,885 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rugrats2001 View Post
I'm sorry, this post makes me sad.

Your mother lived with her house the way she liked it, for many good years. Like you said, she wasn't a pack rat or hoarder, with tons of junk to dispose of. She had actual substantial furniture (gasp!) which she enjoyed, and all you can do is grouse over how much it all weighed when you spent a couple of days getting rid of it?! Do you really feel that she should have 'downsized' to make the week after she died a little bit less work for you? How about YOU let go of your idea that your mother should have sacrificed her happiness in her old age to follow your selfish demands on her lifestyle.

Sad.
One can't be expected to live their lives so its convenient for their heirs when they pass on!

My mother was a bit of a pack rat, and died suddenly and unexpectedly in another state. Thank goodness she left a fair amount of life insurance, so we could hire a moving company that packed up, shipped, and stored her stuff. It took almost two years to sort everything out, a box at a time, but there were treasures among the trash. It gave me a sense of closure to be able to go through stuff that was mine since childhood and I had grown up with. I still keep a few items, you can't be expected to throw out everything!

Just don't have so much stuff it limits/compromises your ability to move, change lifestyles, etc, at any age.

Do keep in mind, moving is expensive, regardless of the value of the items moved. It costs as much to move junk as to move good stuff. Until you've actually been there/done that, its hard to realize what the true cost of moving really is. Packing materials aren't cheap, and no, you can't just go to the grocery store and get boxes You need sturdy boxes with fully closable lids, uniform size so you can stack them, wrapping paper, bubble wrap, labels, markers.....we're already at hundreds of dollars. Then, hiring movers isn't cheap, renting trucks, storage units, then hiring people to unload, not to mention the mental strain of sorting everything at once!

After my mother passed, I tried not to keep too much stuff, but it still has a way of piling up! Just don't let it get to the point you're buried under it!
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Old 04-02-2015, 12:01 PM
 
26,589 posts, read 52,277,138 times
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I would draw the line at the point of renting a storage unit... only exception would be short term with a purpose.

One of my neighbors lost her Mom 27 years ago... she was an only child and took it very hard... Mom had lived in the same apartment for most of her life... not cluttered but still several rooms of belongings some going way back because she was an only child with grandparents that had come to work the Goldfields from China.

Neighbor hired a moving company and had it moved to storage... it's still there and the tragic part is the unit has been broken into twice and jade figurines and such stolen...

The storage unit almost caused a divorce too... subject still causes heated arguments so it's no longer discussed... for the sake of the marriage.

Still remember the worst blow out when the husband added up the cost of the movers and 10 years of storage fees... I had never seen anything like it from an otherwise pleasant couple and the best of neighbors.

He said she is a good, king gentle woman that can't think clearly when it comes to that storage unit... said it is the worse part in their marriage vows.

Wife said she was keeping it for Granddaughter who was a small child then... granddaughter has no room for any of it... she did get a few pieces after the unit was broken into and daughter lost those when her own home was broken into...
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Old 04-02-2015, 03:43 PM
 
9,680 posts, read 15,858,885 times
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Outside of just tossing everything, a storage unit was my only alternative. I was able to absorb most of my mother's furnishings into my own home, but not all those boxes I forget the exact number, but it was around 200--300, none sorted, just dumped into packing boxes. I was recovering from a hip surgery at the time, it was in another state, we simply didn't have the time, money, or ability to do it any other way.

Fortunately, my DH was very supportive. He would go to the storage unit when I asked, bring 1-2 boxes at a time, help me sort if I wished, or just leave me be if I wished.

Oh, another little hint for all my mobile friends---its good to buy at least one hand truck--dolly mover thing. If you need to rent, it adds up, and then you have it when you need it. They sell for about $50 at Lowes, Home Depot, etc.
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Old 04-02-2015, 04:36 PM
 
Location: UpstateNY
8,612 posts, read 8,299,445 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ultrarunner View Post
He collects tractors... me too.

Current is a CAT D3 Dozer, Deere 350 C Dozer, Deere 110 TLB, Kubota L3800, Kubota BX23 and can't forget my ride on Craftsman Mower...

Guess I'm one of those people that could be happy living in a barn or warehouse... ;-)
LOL, Ultra, nothing that exotic. We collect classic Cub Cadet garden tractors from the 60's and 70's. We do have a JD model 30 backhoe, 1969 diesel.

My neighbor does the big stuff. Front end loader, excavator, tractor trailers.




Quote:
Originally Posted by blueherons View Post
If you add another sofa to the other end, that looks just like my mother's sofa.

She's had it recovered at least four times through the years and it is still comfortable as heck!

Wow! Is that currently in a Palm Beach County consignment store?
Nah, just a Google image. I will look for you, though.
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