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Old 07-02-2016, 09:19 AM
 
Location: SW Florida
10,333 posts, read 4,891,329 times
Reputation: 21745

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My mother is 81 and in okay health. Her husband died 6 years ago and we all advised her to sell the 3 bedroom house. It was 23 years old and needed the pool redone, etc. She didn't want to because of all the furniture and stuff so she took out a second mortgage. She has no intention of selling anything so when she dies it will be up to us to clear out the house simply because of her stubbornness. The house, which should have been paid off by now will go to the people who gave her the reverse mortgage. Fortunately none of us want the house except one of my kids.


I have been downsizing for the last 6 months. Books, knick-knacks, clothes, furniture, etc. If I haven't needed it or used it in the last year I give it to Goodwill. I have realized that I don't need most of the stuff I have.
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Old 07-02-2016, 09:05 PM
 
7,049 posts, read 7,007,000 times
Reputation: 5875
Neither my mother nor in-laws de-cluttered before they died. So much stuff to get rid of that we had to rent dumpsters for both clear outs!!
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Old 07-02-2016, 10:10 PM
 
9,693 posts, read 15,888,099 times
Reputation: 16067
Quote:
Originally Posted by staywarm2 View Post
We downsized hugely two years ago and moved to a smaller home. But since then, I'm seeing many items that should have not been kept, many with a sentimental attachment or the old thought, "maybe we'll need this one day." LOL. So still going through stuff and slowly letting go and making many donations or giving items to daughters who want them. It feels good but is still hard work.


Exactly----its HARD work! Better now than later, when you're not physically able to move stuff around. That much stuff can actually be dangerous, if it keeps you from being able to move when and where YOU want to move. That's as opposed to being packed up and hauled away when you're too feeble to do so yourself. Now is the time to make your own decisions. What do you really want to keep, and what can you part with? Remember, downsizing is an emotional as well as a physical drain. I don't want to have to sort through a lifetime of memories, keepsakes, trinkets, etc in a weekend. Its MY life, I want to be the one to sort it out, not a bunch of "helpers" crawling through my stuff with a bunch of questions, judgments, attitude, etc. Also, now's the time to go through personal stuff and keep it private. My aunt kept a diary every day for 70+ years. Shortly before she died, she went through her diaries, and tore out things she felt were nobody's business, and decided what information she wanted to leave behind.


Such tasks take a long time. Like I said, don't wait until they're coming to haul you off!

Last edited by MaryleeII; 07-02-2016 at 11:18 PM..
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Old 07-03-2016, 03:36 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,485 posts, read 43,835,851 times
Reputation: 47263
We Sold Our Piano!!!!

It is a French Provencial bought by my mother in 1975. She played in for many years and all 4 of our kids took lessons on it but only 1 plays and she never comes home. (She's grown with a keyboard in her apartment several hundred miles away.)

We all took very good care of it so it has no scratches or blemishes which is remarkable considering how old it is and how many times it has been moved.
We got $350 for it. I'm happy about that.
It's the first big piece of furniture we have sold getting ready for our downsizing in about 10 months.
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Old 07-04-2016, 05:36 AM
 
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 19,001,270 times
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Question: What do you do with old letters you've received over the years, especially if (till now) you've never reread them and you're not sure you want anyone else to (or you just know they'll be dumped some day)? If you've tossed, do you feel you've lost an important "record" of correspondence though the sender(s) have moved out of your life or died?

Also, if you have adult kids and have always kept a box of their photos and mementos, have you given them their "box" or do you still keep it, thinking that some day in old age you'll want to look back on it all?
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Old 07-04-2016, 06:19 AM
 
284 posts, read 260,088 times
Reputation: 715
It's been a productive couple of weeks for us. We put one of our rental houses on the market and immediately got a contract and just sold our boat yesterday. All necessary steps toward our move next spring. Now that we don't have the boat to keep us busy this summer, we can spend more time clearing out clutter around the house.
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Old 07-04-2016, 01:16 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,485 posts, read 43,835,851 times
Reputation: 47263
Quote:
Originally Posted by RiverBird View Post
Question: What do you do with old letters you've received over the years, especially if (till now) you've never reread them and you're not sure you want anyone else to (or you just know they'll be dumped some day)? If you've tossed, do you feel you've lost an important "record" of correspondence though the sender(s) have moved out of your life or died?

Also, if you have adult kids and have always kept a box of their photos and mementos, have you given them their "box" or do you still keep it, thinking that some day in old age you'll want to look back on it all?
Our "kids" have taken digital photos of all that. It is a completely different way of thinking. Both were given their baby books and photos and school projects and even adoption papers. Both just whipped out their cameras, snapped away and said "OK you can toss all that now". Throw away Baby Books and photos??? Are you kidding me? In fact my daughter and I almost came to blows over her baby book. She absolutely did not care except to take a few photos. I was crushed. She is not married and has no kids so she has no concept of memories of babies, pregnancy, etc.

Finally I said to myself "We are trying to simply our lives. To us that means getting rid of too many papers, photos, etc and we can only offer them to our kids to do with whatever they want." It was hard but that's the way we handled it. BTW I snuck the Baby Books out of the trash and will keep them till the day I die. Just because they doesn't mean anything to them doesn't mean they don't mean anything to me.
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Old 07-04-2016, 05:39 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,485 posts, read 43,835,851 times
Reputation: 47263
^^^too late to correct errors in above. Meant "simplify" where I wrote "simply" and meant "just because they don't ..." instead of "they doesn't....". There, I feel better. Once an English teacher always an English teacher.
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Old 07-04-2016, 06:18 PM
 
Location: Living near our Nation's Capitol since 2010
2,177 posts, read 2,919,139 times
Reputation: 5851
Yesterday I decided to go thru a closet full of old but still good clothing. I was going to take the stuff I no longer want to Goodwill today. Coincidently, a neighbor posted a Facebook thing that said that her church, a half mile from my house..was collecting clothing to take to West Virginia flood victims. I was SO glad to be able to drop off these still good clothes to people who have lost so much.
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Old 07-05-2016, 06:54 AM
 
Location: Somewhere in deep in Maine
3,665 posts, read 2,817,603 times
Reputation: 4441
I went to Good will and bought 200 bucks worth of useless things to fill up my garage.
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