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Old 04-14-2015, 11:20 AM
 
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 18,971,705 times
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Interesting replies.

The few happiest-married people I know are those who remarried after their spouse died, or who speculate that they would marry again. I know far more sort-of happily and unhappily married couples; the wives say they would never remarry again, ever. They say it vehemently! So I guess it's a compliment when a husband or wife remarries. They had something so good they want it again. Others say they had it so good that it could never be replicated and thus would not remarry, but I haven't personally come across that view.
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Old 04-14-2015, 11:28 AM
 
Location: too far from the sea
19,838 posts, read 18,845,295 times
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Yes. I had it bad twice and it was not my fault, twice divorced. I married my current husband when I was 62 and finally I think I got it right. Someone to laugh with, to travel with, to help around the house--and he COOKS.
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Old 04-14-2015, 11:31 AM
 
6,566 posts, read 1,348,237 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jertheber View Post
I retired at 62, bought a home a hundred miles from my old address, my wife died a few months after we moved, I was left alone in a very small town. Getting to know people in small town America wasn't easy, lived by myself for a few years and struggled a bit with loneliness and a feeling of social isolation. People thought online dating may help me get some better social connections, they were right, married four years now and we've never regretted a thing about our doing so.

Life is about change, that the only thing we can count on is the fact that we can't count on anything should be a sobering thought for all who feel the need to live in a past long gone. Of course those who actually don't mind being alone and like it, should be alone. But I've seen way too many people living alone simply because they find everything to complain about with regard to dating and meeting others. My present wife and I have lived out our dreams of retirement despite the fact of our spouses deaths. Traveling together, making one of our houses into a house for both, doing hobbies together, and just the simple act of awakening with the one you love has been a reward far beyond the risk taken by us both.
Nice story, and I am very happy for you both!
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Old 04-14-2015, 11:35 AM
 
Location: Dallas, TX and Las Vegas, NV
5,695 posts, read 4,415,996 times
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I was widowed at 50 and remarried at 56. Now I'm 66. I have sure enjoyed being married again and love sharing time together. So far we are both healthy. I don't believe if I was to become widowed again that I would choose to marry but I would want a companion. And part of such a decision is the other person's needs. So, as someone said, never say never.
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Old 04-14-2015, 11:45 AM
 
Location: Kountze, Texas
1,013 posts, read 1,159,032 times
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My husbands Aunt was about 78 when she remarried (after being divorced for more than 35 years). She was happy with him until he died about 4 years ago - she is 88 now.

I'm 50 now - pretty sure if DH dies I won't remarry.
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Old 04-14-2015, 11:49 AM
Status: "Support the Mining Law of 1872" (set 8 days ago)
 
Location: Cody, WY
9,572 posts, read 10,917,875 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by arwenmark View Post
I have been married almost 47 years I am 63. My husband is the only man I have ever been with.
If he dies before me there is no way I can picture myself ever remarrying, or even dating for that matter.
I'm with you. My late wife and I had forty-two wonderful years together. To even think of marrying someone else would not only be dishonorable, but I find the idea abhorrent. We married three months after we graduated from college. She's the only woman I've ever been with; I still consider us to be married.

I know that many here will laugh and sneer at both of us, but they're the ones who have never known erstanding what love and marriage are.
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Old 04-14-2015, 12:15 PM
 
Location: Las Vegas
13,888 posts, read 25,316,043 times
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I would be remarried today except for the fact we are not willing to pay the marriage penalty for our upcoming SS benefits. Plus I would have given up my widow's benefits if I had remarried before 60. We couldn't find any way to make marriage come out even close to financially neutral.

So we will just be room mates. I think a lot of seniors are in this position.
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Old 04-14-2015, 12:24 PM
 
11,935 posts, read 20,383,027 times
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About six months after my dad died at 57 (mom was 53), I told my mother I would totally support her dating and wouldn't make a fuss over it.

She thanked me... but no way. By the way, in her circle of friends, Daddy was the first to "take his bow".

A year later I said it again and she said -- "Have you looked at the men my age? Available men my age are available for a reason, and I don't need a project."

As the years went by, more of the men in her circle departed the earth.... and a few of the women dated or kept company.

She would tell me things like -- Bitty (they all had funny nicknames) is seeing a guy and the only good thing she can say about him is he is clean. Tink said her boyfriend's drinking more.

Only one of her friends found a new good marriage. They both had spouses die at around the same time after lengthy illnesses, and they met and commiserated at the hospital. They were friends and then they dated... and then married. Very successful second marriage.

So would I do it? It would have to be the very right person. And my husband is a very hard act to follow, and I am doing my level best to keep him healthy.
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Old 04-14-2015, 12:26 PM
 
6,566 posts, read 1,348,237 times
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Originally Posted by Tallysmom View Post

And my husband is a very hard act to follow, and I am doing my level best to keep him healthy.
LOL!!! Good for you!!!!
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Old 04-14-2015, 12:27 PM
 
12,825 posts, read 20,135,648 times
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I'm not even 60 yet, and still somehow married, and as of today, the answer is negative. And that answer is the same for passing away or divorce.
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