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Aww that brings back a sad memory for me and one of our regular cystic fibrosis patients. He and his disabled girlfriend were receiving assistance and if they married their benefits would be cut. They had a wedding with all the trimmings without being legally married. They lived together but they both had apartments in the same building. She died about two years later and he died about a year after that Every once in awhile you have a patient that still haunts you years later. I still think of them decades later and how special their love for each other was. They didn't need that piece of paper.
My mother was very religious and believed in marriage; however, she always said if two people were older and would have to forfeit pensions to marry, she thought it was all right to just live together. I go along with that, although provisions should be made for the person who outlives their mate to stay in the house they shared for the rest of life.
If the OP has a good lifetime pension and health insurance, it might be wise not to remarry officially. I don't see the point of the spiritual marriage either. You could make a commitment to each other without any of this.
At the same time you might want to see an attorney and prepare powers of attorney in case something happens to one of you and the other needs some authorization for healthcare or financial decisions.
Seems the Catholic Church is now ok on "shacking up".
The synod was more embracive of cohabiting heterosexuals, stating that some couples may not marry in the church for cultural or economic reasons. Their bonds, the synod concluded, could nevertheless involve the kind of “lasting” and “reliable” ties that can eventually lead to marriage.
Seems the Catholic Church is now ok on "shacking up".
The synod was more embracive of cohabiting heterosexuals, stating that some couples may not marry in the church for cultural or economic reasons. Their bonds, the synod concluded, could nevertheless involve the kind of “lasting” and “reliable” ties that can eventually lead to marriage.
I have no idea and don't actually care what his mother thinks as he just told me this. Clearly I need to question him further on this issue. I'm not on board at all with it.
Not sure why he feels the need for this. If you love each other and are happy, why bother? My spouse and I lived together for several years before getting married (2nd marriage). Both a little gun shy and didn't feel there was a need for legality. As we aged, I had military benefits that would be beneficial to her, especially heath care, so we made it legal. Would we still be together without making it legal? Absolutely.
Not sure why he feels the need for this. If you love each other and are happy, why bother? My spouse and I lived together for several years before getting married (2nd marriage). Both a little gun shy and didn't feel there was a need for legality. As we aged, I had military benefits that would be beneficial to her, especially heath care, so we made it legal. Would we still be together without making it legal? Absolutely.
some people believe living together as man and wife w/0 being married is a sin.
You do not
My SO says he has read about spiritual weddings that aren't legal so people can keep there pensions. Has anybody ever heard of this? I'm just not sure about this at all.
It smells like fraud. You might want to talk to a criminal attorney to see what the repercussions might be, if any.
It smells like fraud. You might want to talk to a criminal attorney to see what the repercussions might be, if any.
Fraud of what kind and by who? Me or my SO or the state of NH?
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Every once in awhile you have a patient that still haunts you years later. I still think of them decades later and how special their love for each other was. They didn't need that piece of paper.
