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Old 01-19-2016, 08:38 AM
 
Location: West Central Ohio
424 posts, read 235,013 times
Reputation: 628

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Did you know that most disabilities are usually readily accepted with sympathy and understanding? Did you know that a hearing loss is the least accepted? It makes people mad when someone cannot understand what is being said. This loss is the most ridiculed.

People think when someone is hard of hearing that you shout for them to hear you. That is the worse thing you can do for someone who cannot understand you. The reason is now the sound is now distorted. If you notice someone isn't understanding you, say to them "look at my mouth" now repeat what you said slowly distinctly in a normal tone. This works.

Don't be surprised at those with a hearing disability will sometimes think you said something totally different than what you said. They also may not understand you at all and after a while just nod and act like they hear you because saying "Huh?" for the 50th time makes every one frustrated. It is possible that you shared a very important thing and expect your loved one to know what you said and they did not.

Example of thinking something is totally opposite of what was said: My husband and I were at Walmart and they had these life sized garden statues. He and I stopped to look at them. I walked a few feet away and had my back turned, when the associate said to my husband, "are you interested in the statues?" What did I hear? "Where did you get your tattoo's" I turned and said to her "in the Navy" to which both looked at me like I had grown another head. It still makes me laugh. (you can laugh too) But my brain was so use to filling in the spaces of what I thought I had heard when in reality was often totally incorrect.

This is why this disability is not tolerated. It can also lead to anger when some one thinks your ignoring them on purpose.

Hearing aids are usually not covered by insurance and hearing loss is now being discovered that it can lead to dementia.

So if you have a hearing loss try and get help. For a long time I wore MD hearing aid pro which are fairly reasonable. I now have digital hearing aids that are considered from the economy line. I hear so well with these I am confused at how much different you would hear from the top of the lines ones.

Sadly maybe insurance will pay for them someday.

If you have a loved one with a hearing loss, please be patient with them. If something is very important ask them to stop and look at you in the mouth. Say it distinctly and if your unsure they understood you, ask them to repeat what you said. Don't be surprised when it is not what you said.
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Old 01-19-2016, 08:45 AM
 
Location: Central NY
4,682 posts, read 3,253,088 times
Reputation: 11987
My mother was hard of hearing and when I was younger I did not understand. I thought she was trying to manipulate me...... I know sounds nuts, doesn't it?

My late sister had cerebral palsy and people (even medical) thought she was hard of hearing and retarded. The behavior of one of the nurses she had in an ER after a fall really made me upset.

Maybe it's because people cannot see a hearing disability?
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Old 01-19-2016, 09:02 AM
 
Location: West Central Ohio
424 posts, read 235,013 times
Reputation: 628
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYgal2NC View Post
Maybe it's because people cannot see a hearing disability?
Maybe but blind people are not ridiculed like those with hearing disabilities. Why do people want to make it personal when you do not understand them?
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Old 01-19-2016, 09:05 AM
bUU
 
Location: Georgia
11,885 posts, read 8,668,795 times
Reputation: 8415
My spouse is hearing impaired and while there have been occasions where accommodation and reactions toward the disability were not ideal, it never has risen to the level where we'd categorically label it "intolerant". Lucky, I suppose.

I would suggest though, even in light of the worst of my spouse's experiences, that the least tolerated disability is almost surely one that was not considered by whatever means by which you established that hearing impairment was the least tolerated. Nothing could be worse than a general disregard for a disability; nothing worse than the blatant blaming of the victim that goes on when a disability is not recognized as such; nothing worse than the prejudicial recriminations against those who have a disability not regarded as such.
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Old 01-19-2016, 09:26 AM
TKO
 
Location: On the Border
2,966 posts, read 3,107,564 times
Reputation: 2455
Mental health disability takes the cake. Also because it can't be seen. But it scares people in a way that other disabilities don't and that leads to issues with interaction...
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Old 01-19-2016, 09:36 AM
 
6,305 posts, read 4,746,934 times
Reputation: 12909
Illnesses and disabilities are not well tolerated. Period. I am sure this includes deafness, but also mental health, drug abuse, alcohol and tobacco addictions, overeating and obesity, chronic fatigue and other illnesses with no overt manifestations. I do think we tend to have a bit more tolerance for someone with a clear physical impairment such as a missing limb, but that does not mean much as an indication for overall tolerance and sympathy.
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Old 01-19-2016, 09:38 AM
 
Location: Inland Northwest
1,793 posts, read 1,148,237 times
Reputation: 1845
It's not necessarily the losing of hearing that people are typically upset about. It's that the people losing the hearing fail to acknowledge it and don't do anything about it, i.e. cochlear implants, hearing aids, etc.


Source: I'm partially deaf and took measures to fix it. My Mom was losing her hearing and we helped her get some nice hearing aids. 100% better when she has the hearing aids in.
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Old 01-19-2016, 09:48 AM
bUU
 
Location: Georgia
11,885 posts, read 8,668,795 times
Reputation: 8415
However, I think that argument is too often presented as a rationalization for indefensible conduct toward, and unacceptable disregard for accommodation of, hearing impaired individuals. As I'm sure you know, any expectation that all hearing impaired people should have cochlear implants is, on its face, patently unreasonable, reflecting a lack of understanding and/or consideration of myriad factors including economic, medical and human. Furthermore, the expectation by some that hearing aids restore hearing 100% is inaccurate. What's worse is that one of the most insidious aspects of wearing hearing aids, of which you may or may not be aware, is how for some people they tend to increase the occurrence of ear infections, a vicious circle that also belies reliance on hearing aids as the sole means of accommodation for some hearing impaired individuals.
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Old 01-19-2016, 10:12 AM
 
6,305 posts, read 4,746,934 times
Reputation: 12909
Quote:
Originally Posted by TrafficCory View Post
It's not necessarily the losing of hearing that people are typically upset about. It's that the people losing the hearing fail to acknowledge it and don't do anything about it.........

And fat people don't lose weight and addicted people remain addicted and others we just blame because they appear lazy or we think they failed to take care of themselves.
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Old 01-19-2016, 11:06 AM
 
Location: Houston, TX
14,698 posts, read 8,501,199 times
Reputation: 29413
Totally agree with OP. I work with the elderly in our ophthalmic practice, and I have learned to work with hard of hearing people. It's pretty easy in most instances. When I figure out they can't hear me, I just speak more slowly and clearly, not louder. Speaking louder is usually ineffective in getting your message across. I'm patient with them. It's not their fault the're hard of hearing, and hearing loss is natural as a person ages. And it's true about the hearing aids. They are ridiculously expensive and usually not covered by insurance. I'm surprised how many family members of hard of hearing people still try the shouting method to try to talk to them. They haven't learned that doesn't work, even thought they've been around them for years
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