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Old 02-21-2016, 11:40 AM
Location: Central NY
4,706 posts, read 3,276,460 times
Reputation: 12103


Paka, so very sorry for your loss.
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Old 02-21-2016, 08:46 PM
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,792,060 times
Reputation: 32309
Originally Posted by Paka View Post
I retired at 60 a little over a year ago mainly to take care of my precious baby sister who had Stage 4 cancer. She had lost her husband (who at age 57, a pilot and thrill seeker) fell over dead of a massive heart attack while out buying a new motorcycle.

The 1st 8 months of my retirement were not FUN (or easy) being the primary caregiver for her, but I was so GRATEFUL to be able to be there for her as needed.

Since she passed in June, we have been able to travel again (our passion for sure!) and so much fun.

I am GRATEFUL for my retirement time, because it has been spent on things that are so important to me. Can't wait for DH to retire (again, retired AF 2001) so we can spend ALL our time doing what WE want to without a schedule to conform to!!!!
Your heart-felt story is a good example of what the OP was asking for. "Fun and easy" was not to be for you for the first 8 months, but you wouldn't have wanted it any other way because you were grateful to be able to be of service in a way that was important and meaningful to you.

Somehow your statement is very significant. What is most pleasant (easiest) may not be the most gratifying. But I'm glad you have been able to move on to the fun aspects and that you are looking forward to even more along those lines.
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Old 02-22-2016, 12:13 AM
Location: San Antonio
7,629 posts, read 14,406,314 times
Reputation: 18712
I must admit, it took awhile after losing her. I had helped care for my dear momma who passed on 1 Sept, then was total care provider for my baby sister. Momma was 86, had lost all quality of life and when she passed it was a true blessing to all. She was ready, WANTING to get to heaven and realized it was her time. That made it a little easier (not a lot, but somewhat) to send her "home"....my baby sister not so much. She loved life, had a heart of gold and was only 58 when she died after a valiant effort to "beat this crap"! I really was depressed trying to absorb both of their losses once Donna passed and I finally had time to "morn" both of them. With only 10 months between the two losses, it was a very difficult time.

Having lost my baby brother (we buried him on what would have been his 32nd birthday, shot and killed in the line of duty as a police officer) and now my precious baby sister, I sometimes feel "guilty" to survive as the oldest. God has granted me so very much, and yet they did not get to live and experience the wonders "aging" have brought to my life. I am grateful to God for the opportunity to have the experiences they were not to enjoy, and try to enjoy for both of them as well.

I am grateful I have finally crawled out of my "funk" and have realized life is something to be experienced and enjoyed again.
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