U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Closed Thread Start New Thread
Old 03-09-2016, 05:18 AM
2,366 posts, read 647,118 times
Reputation: 2481


Dear OP regarding your question and desire to get out of a rut. All good advice from those positive posters regarding seeking help for a possible depression, but have you considered talking to your PCP, as well, regarding wanting to get out of a rut and desiring to do more but just mostly think about it? I am not an expert, but sometimes there is an underlying medical problem that could be easily solved that might help. And physicians, unfortunately, these days, may ignore some basic reasons for your complaints and end up treating the symptom ( which can sometimes be depression). Perhaps just going to the medical doctor and stating your desire to be doing more but seem to be in a rut might allow a broader look. He/she should then ask medical/physical questions that allow them to diagnose. In your case, perhaps less unsolicited info at first and allowing them to ask the questions. At the very least an internist or GP should do lab work to determine if you are anemic or have a thyroid issue or any other number of treatable issues that can creep up on a person and in this day and age be lost in the weeds, unfortunately. Just my 2 cents worth. And best of luck to you and remember, there are and were people on here who do put a face to you and care, because MOST OF US HAVE BEEN THERE

Old 03-09-2016, 05:31 AM
Location: Central NY
4,697 posts, read 3,267,134 times
Reputation: 12062
corpgypsy: Thanks for your post, great suggestion.

I did just have a physical with my PCP. Lots of blood work. Very recently went through chest x-ray and CT scan and thyroid ultrasound which showed some thyroid nodules. I did have biopsies of them, all proved negative. My thyroid function is fine after being tested.

I think what another poster (or two) pointed out that I probably have not grieved my sister and friends who have passed away which I believe to be true.

I also believe I have a sinus infection which I will be making a doctor's appointment. And I will see my hospice counselor next week.

As an old saying goes, time takes time. And I almost never give myself enough of it.
Old 03-09-2016, 05:33 AM
16,023 posts, read 19,741,073 times
Reputation: 26210
Originally Posted by NYgal2NC View Post
I agree with your idea. Though I feel I would do better with little kids. I need to check out what is available to me in that area.

Thank you.
There are likely several...I always wanted to be involved in one of those programs that need nurturing people to rock babies in nursery's...but those were only in large metro areas...like where you are. There are usually needs for helping in schools, reading programs etc. Hope you find something rewarding to volunteer for.
Old 03-09-2016, 05:49 AM
2,366 posts, read 647,118 times
Reputation: 2481
Oh good for you! I do hope you take care of yourself and find the inside place that works for you. We are individuals and everything takes a different amount of time for each of us and we all react to issues and life in our own way...there is no one right formula but thankfully there are others who can help us see legitimate options etc, when we are honest about doing it for ourselves and not trying to please others or fit into a mold. Retirement for me has opened the door to be more of the self that sometimes was put aside for other necessary life stuff. Retirement mantra for me: "Inspired not required". Again, best of all to you!
Old 03-09-2016, 10:15 AM
Location: Somewhere in America
12,304 posts, read 10,799,244 times
Reputation: 20547
Sounds like you need to take up some hobbies and get out of the house! Many retirees get depressed. Their lives have dramatically changed. Many feel useless because they're not working anymore. Find a way to volunteer. Some communities have volunteer grandparents. Go find something to do!
Old 03-09-2016, 10:49 AM
Location: Central NY
4,697 posts, read 3,267,134 times
Reputation: 12062
Originally Posted by ss20ts View Post
Sounds like you need to take up some hobbies and get out of the house! Many retirees get depressed. Their lives have dramatically changed. Many feel useless because they're not working anymore. Find a way to volunteer. Some communities have volunteer grandparents. Go find something to do!
As soon as I feel better (sinus infection/irritated bronchial tube) I'm planning to do that. Really want to get out and walk first!
Old 03-09-2016, 11:21 AM
Location: Chicago area
14,452 posts, read 7,956,638 times
Reputation: 53614
Originally Posted by NYgal2NC View Post
animalcrazy: Thank you for your wonderful post.

I haven't ridden a bike in years. I live in a senior (I'm almost 74) income-based apartment. Walking is really my choice of exercise. But I just need a kick in the pants to get out there and do it. Right now I'm dealing with a sinus thing or head cold and need time to get over it. If I'm still not good by tomorrow I'll see the doctor.

I do have a cat from the SPCA. She is a wonderful addition to my home. Very playful, very funny. She makes me laugh a lot. We are limited to one pet per apartment.

I have good friends, but like everyone else, they are engrossed in their own lives and problems. So getting support from them is minimal. I understand this and am not resentful. I believe in doing what I can to pull myself out of the rut, but found it nice to have a place (C-D) to see how others handle it.

I like the idea of helping each other! My doctor says I am pre-diabetic and exercise and weight loss are strongly recommended. So apparently I have a sugar issue, too.

Thank you for your suggestion, let's try it!

You're most welcome dear one.

We roller skate with people in their 70's 80's and one is 92. I always feel better physically and mentally when I exercise.

I'm glad you have a pet. I personally can't breath without one. I'm also glad you have good friends. One of my besties keeps me laughing even if it's for a fast game of scrabble. Maybe you could start a game night? Maybe a movie night? Anything that generates a laugh.

I play a lot of board games with the shorties when they come for their monthly sleep over. The kids are also a constant source of smiles.

Maybe we could be a support for each other with this sugar addiction? There are days that the cravings are so bad that I just want to take the gas pipe. It's my crack
Old 03-09-2016, 11:28 AM
Location: ☀️ SWFL ⛱ 🌴
2,446 posts, read 1,682,576 times
Reputation: 8774
You've had some hard knocks this past year and have been given some good ideas to think about.

I'll add one more thought: limit your C-D time and interactions for a while. Negative posters can have a serious affect on you when you're down already. The old adage one bad apple spoils the rest comes to mind. There seems to be a pecking order with some members here and they can't refrain from taking cheap shots at your expense or some others here. I'm not impressed when someone scores points off of another person in need, whether they think it was deserved or not. They've chosen the lower road and that says volumes.

Social media can be like watching the nightly news and reading the newspaper. If these are your main connections to the world, the world may seem warped and not worthwhile anymore. Start shifting your life to more interactions with real people and less time with virtual ones on the screen. Walking around the block and saying hi to someone as they pass by seems so inconsequential, but it adds a positive to your day and doubles it when they give a greeting in return Every bit helps; start small and I hope you will be pleasantly surprised.

Last edited by jean_ji; 03-09-2016 at 11:38 AM..
Old 03-09-2016, 01:45 PM
Location: Ponte Vedra Beach FL
14,628 posts, read 17,966,631 times
Reputation: 6718
Could it be that winter isn't quite finished up north yet - you've been cooped up - and now you have a sinus infection to boot? Spring came here in a big whoosh in the last week or two. Even though the winters here in NE Florida aren't that bad - my mood improved considerably (although my back is killing me from all the spring gardening work).

BTW - here's a world class bird place in your neck of the woods (upstate New York) where you might get some information about birds and bird activities:


Old 03-09-2016, 05:11 PM
Location: Central NY
4,697 posts, read 3,267,134 times
Reputation: 12062
Robyn55: You are so right about the weather and how it affects my moods. We have a lot of gloomy, grey days up here, tho having watched the world news and the horrible storms/flooding some in the south are having, I am grateful to be here and not worried about losing everything.

Thank you for the Birds site. I have a real interest in them and other animals, as well as a curiosity of our country and interesting places to visit. Sometimes I feel like my feet are in cement, can't get out of my own way sometimes. Need to work on that, too.

Thank you for writing.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.

Closed Thread

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top