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Old 03-24-2016, 09:06 AM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,744,100 times
Reputation: 32304

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jrkliny View Post
........... Now that I am retired I am not looking to relax and retreat into a cave............
Neither am I, and I have repeatedly posted in support of the philosophical position as you expressed it in the brief sentence I quoted above. But there is nothing wrong with increased relaxation and reduced stress as compared to our working lives. We can still be active, engaged with the world, and doing worthwhile things at the same time we have dialed back our achievement requirements. Too much of a good thing is frequently a bad thing, so a frenzy of compulsive activity is not a legitimate general goal either. It is a question of balance, and there is a wide range of acceptable balance between the extremes depending on people's natures.
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Old 03-24-2016, 09:11 AM
 
6,260 posts, read 4,737,090 times
Reputation: 12853
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fox Terrier View Post
How dramatic!

I won't answer your post as I would like to. It's off topic and I wouldn't want to see the thread shut down.

Despite your chest-pounding, I remain unconvinced that you are in any way special; special enough to sit in judgment of others, in particular.
I am not sure what ugliness you have that would shut down this thread. Nor do I see what you call chest pounding. As I said I am certainly not a great man and not a man of great accomplishments. At least I have tried. I know nothing about you and anyone else on the forum and I certainly do not pretend to sit in judgment.


Perhaps Thoreau was more than a bit pessimistic when he refers to the mass of mankind. You also need to realize he was living in a rigid, Puritanical society that had barely progressed beyond the witch hunts. I do think Thoreau's observations can be related to this topic. Many--or if you prefer, some--people go through life with little thought and few goals. When they get older their previous goals may no longer mean anything and there is little else to motive them. Hopefully, none of this applies to you. But I certainly do not understand why you are so upset. Anyway, if you are looking for something to read, consider Thoreau.
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Old 03-24-2016, 09:18 AM
 
6,260 posts, read 4,737,090 times
Reputation: 12853
Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
Neither am I, and I have repeatedly posted in support of the philosophical position as you expressed it in the brief sentence I quoted above. But there is nothing wrong with increased relaxation and reduced stress as compared to our working lives. We can still be active, engaged with the world, and doing worthwhile things at the same time we have dialed back our achievement requirements. Too much of a good thing is frequently a bad thing, so a frenzy of compulsive activity is not a legitimate general goal either. It is a question of balance, and there is a wide range of acceptable balance between the extremes depending on people's natures.
Good points. I would certainly agree that as we get older we should have less stress in coping with the world of work. We necessarily need to dial back on our energy levels. We do not need to spend our time in pursuing careers. Often with a more thoughtful and slower approach, we can accomplish even more.


I have found in my retirement that my former idea of goals often does not even fit. I seem to be frequently changing directions, trying new things and am often less certain of the next goals.
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Old 03-24-2016, 09:35 AM
 
Location: Columbia SC
8,974 posts, read 7,749,631 times
Reputation: 12182
My late wife had upper management positions that required travel and interaction with others so when she retired she was more content to stay home than go out. She was by no means a recluse but she more had to have a reason to go out such as shopping, dinner, vacation, visiting, etc., otherwise she was happy staying home.

I am the opposite. For me to spend an entire day in the house is abnormal. As I no longer have to consider her I can come and go as I please, when and where I want. As an example I rarely make a grocery list. If I need a few things, I just go get them. Typically I go out every day for breakfast and/or lunch plus I play golf 3 times a week.

My point is I believe much of what we do is in our nature. Being a homebody is not being a recluse. It just suits some. As we age it gets easier to stay home and I say rally against the urge to do so. Get up and go.
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Old 03-24-2016, 09:39 AM
 
6,260 posts, read 4,737,090 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by johngolf View Post
... As we age it gets easier to stay home and I say rally against the urge to do so. Get up and go.
That is the best advice I have read on this thread.
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Old 03-24-2016, 09:40 AM
 
Location: New Jersey
12,764 posts, read 7,827,604 times
Reputation: 13083
Quote:
Originally Posted by jrkliny View Post
I am not sure what ugliness you have that would shut down this thread. Nor do I see what you call chest pounding. As I said I am certainly not a great man and not a man of great accomplishments. At least I have tried. I know nothing about you and anyone else on the forum and I certainly do not pretend to sit in judgment.

No ugliness. As you may be aware, threads get shut down when they go off-topic. That is what I was trying to avoid.

As far as you 'don't pretend to sit in judgment', you contradict yourself:

Quote:

jrkliny

Unfortunately this thread seems to have deteriorated with more and more posts indicating wasted lives and great sadness. Even more pathetic the waste and sadness seem to be accompanied with a list of excuses.
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Old 03-24-2016, 10:07 AM
 
Location: Lakewood OH
21,697 posts, read 23,672,920 times
Reputation: 35449
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vision67 View Post
Perhaps this is what happens if you don't live near your grandchildren.

People need a reason to get out of the house.
Or perhaps this happens if one depends only upon their grandchildren to get them out of the house. I know of too many situations where elderly women sit waiting by the window for their adult grandchildren to come by to take them out. Or in the case of young grandchildren, their elderly person's adult children to come by and take them to see the grandchildren.

Better to strive to have one's own plan for a social life. If there are mental issues, these must be addressed.
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Old 03-24-2016, 10:08 AM
 
Location: Albuquerque NM
1,661 posts, read 1,527,059 times
Reputation: 3650
I was talking to a male co-worker the other day about retirement. He is 66 and can afford to retire. His current projects are very stressful but he says if he retired, he would get antsy after a few days as he does not like hanging around the house. This guy is an avid golfer, has side businesses, and has several large dogs that could use a daily walk so I know he would not be home that much. But he is the hyperactive type. In contrast, I am counting the months to retirement. Now I also have plans to travel, exercise more, etc. but my home is my sanctuary and I love to putter around the kitchen, play on the internet, and hang out with my cats. This is not unusual for women.
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Old 03-24-2016, 10:25 AM
 
Location: Chicago area
14,406 posts, read 7,929,570 times
Reputation: 53535
I don't know of anyone in that age group that stays home. One of my new friends is 70 and she rides her own motorcycle, roller skates with us on Friday mornings and went ice skating with us a few weeks back. She also works a couple of days a week.

Our neighbor is 70 and she is active in local politics, walks her dog, swims, and is always out and about.

My other friend that is 70 is unfortunately quite ill, yet I saw her out in her yard doing some gardening the other day. She spends a lot of time going from doctor to doctor, and her quality of life isn't that great, but she still gets out and enjoys herself.

John's aunt is in her 70's and lives alone in a cabin on a lake. She plows her own driveway and has a boyfriend.

I can't imagine just being confined to a house. There will be plenty of time for that when I'm too old to roller skate, ice skate, ski, ride my bike, walk my dogs, hang with my friends, and go to the movies. Until then I'm going to use it to the fullest until I lose it.
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Old 03-24-2016, 10:30 AM
 
Location: NE Mississippi
13,673 posts, read 8,585,088 times
Reputation: 19871
Quote:
Originally Posted by Umbria View Post
I think we are saying the same thing - that you do not have to be uncomfortable to look nice.


I would make a terrible shut in. With all the freedom retirees have - what not take advantage of it....
Actually, we have heard from a lot of folks who DO take advantage of their freedom - by staying home! Some people, it seems, love their homes.

And others, for reasons that escape me, love airports and cruise ships.
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