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My husband and I both like people, but since we have retired, we don't get out "there" much. We moved to a very small town, and if we don't leave our property, we won't see another soul. So sometimes we go into town 1-2 times that week, just to see other people.
We don't like big crowds of people nor big parties like we used to. We prefer smaller intimate gatherings. We both enjoy being home a lot and doing our hobbies. Or doing nothing, lol.
My ideal is going out to dinner maybe once a week or every other week with another couple, or having another couple over to the house for dinner. Then I'm good for the rest of the week. LOL>
We've all read stories or known people that turned into hermits later in life. I have an uncle who was an electrical engineer for GM for years. He worked on the Apollo program and helped develop the onboard computers for that, or at least that's what I was told. A lot of his work was military as he could never talk about it. He'd had it kind of rough. Had a wife and three kids when he was young, but she was a classic gold digger and dumped him for another guy after she had the kids. So he got stuck with the check.
He was the classic quiet egg head nurd type guy. Never remarried. Then when he retired, he moved to the north woods of Wis. We didn't hear too much from him after that. Getting close to that retirement age myself now, I'm getting less tolerant of people, our materialistic society and its screwed up lifestyles. Withdrawing from society has a lot more appeal than it used to. Becoming a hermit is more understandable. Anyone else considered this or done it?
I don't mind people who are quiet and mindful that "If someone is sitting at a table with one chair, it ain't because they didn't look for one with more"
Had one person who (For what reason) would pull up a chair (Not ask if I was lonely or wanted company or wanted anyone sitting at the same table) and then started with questions (I was trying to eat) and started with questions and after 3 "No", "No' and "No" shut up BUT STAYED AT THE TABLE!
Fixable problems. The 2 solutions I have heard/read the most about are smart carts that know what all your items are as you add them to your cart and AI scanners that look at a 3D picture of the item and figure out what it is if there isn't a bar code or it doesn't scan. The most common issue I have had with them is when you buy a really small package of something like parsley it doesn't detect that you bagged it. A camera with smarter software could fix that also. Anyway, I think within 5 years we will see some stores with systems that are nearly perfect; it will take much longer to be widespread though.
Dave, Dave, that's the 10th bottle of wine you have bought this week. I can't let you have another till next week. It's going to interfere with the mission. I can't do that, Dave.
I am becoming less interested in social events as I get older, but that is only a longtime trend, not a big change.
Although definitely not a hermit, I could probably live as one, in a remote area. Not on the agenda; I just would prefer that to being sardined with people and little relief from them.
We should start a forum for would-be hermits. Some people might like to try a hermit lifestyle for a year to see if it's for them. And some might already be hermits, but want more information on how to live better alone. Such as what state to live in, and why. And whether to live in a house or condo or what, and why. In some states an old hermit might be considered borderline insane, just for being a hermit. And if they start to get senile, they might get thrown into a nursing home or something, just because the government doesn't want them to live alone. Therefore one of the first things old people need to know before becoming hermits is what states they can live in safely without losing their freedom.
OTOH, if you're on the internet, you're never alone. So real hermits are actually obsolete. But maybe in the future we will have robot hermits.
We go out everyday for shopping and errands, I go swimming every day too, see lots of kids. But my husband and I like to go over to my sister's house to take care of her yard. Weird in a sort of way. It's like having another place to go to beside our home. She is not even there. But we see her neighbors and said hello. I still have tons of paper work to do that's why we don't go out further. I think we be less of a hermit when I'm done with all the paperwork. 6 retirement papers, 4 income taxes, 2 are amended.
This is why I go on Internet but my husband does not. He watches the birds outside the garden.
I think it is very easy for a good number of older people to become hermit-like in retirement.
I've read how a startling realization to a good number of retirees is the aloneness of not automatically having people at work to relate to and to automatically be around every day. And that they were not prepared for the isolation, just from being at home every day rather than being in the workplace surrounded by people.
In many instances in retirement, one has to make a concerted effort to have people to relate to, especially single retirees without a significant other.
I also don't think there is an easy answer. Whenever a retiree mentions this syndrome, the retiree is immediately told to do volunteer work, join clubs, go to Meet Up groups, go to Senior Center etc. All of which make sense - but still are not a complete answer which meet needs nor are they solutions for everyone.
I think men who still have the physical abilities to play golf a lot in retirement have it made! Golf puts them around people to socialize with & often they go for food/drinks before or after golf.
Last edited by matisse12; 04-15-2016 at 01:42 PM..
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I've read how a startling realization to a good number of retirees is the aloneness of not automatically having people at work to relate to and to automatically be around every day. And that they were not prepared for the isolation, just from being at home every day rather than being in the workplace surrounded by people.
In many instances in retirement, one has to make a concerted effort to have people to relate to, especially single retirees without a significant other.
I also don't think there is an easy answer. Whenever a retiree mentions this syndrome, the retiree is immediately told to do volunteer work, join clubs, go to Meet Up groups, go to Senior Center etc. All of which make sense - but still are not a complete answer which meet needs nor are they solutions for everyone.
Alone and lonely are not synonyms.
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