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Old 11-05-2016, 05:08 PM
 
Location: ☀️ SWFL ⛱ 🌴
2,439 posts, read 1,675,248 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by runswithscissors View Post
Awesome. I work in continuing care communities like that every day dog walking. They're fantastic. God bless your dad.

They have Independent, then Assisted, then Skilled and the Memory Care is located in the Skilled building. Very important to have Memory Care not just Assisted and Skilled.

It's important for your mom to develop a relationship with the caregivers and she will. But you CAN pay a separate agency to augment her care a bit if you've been using one now with whom she has a relationship. Moves can be tricky with dementia (see Caregiving Forum). You want everything CALM and not too many people in the room at once and very little talking. Especially nervous chatter. LOL I have one client 92 y.o with "hardening of the artieries" type of dementia NOT the anxious combative dementia and she LOVES it there. SO HAPPY.

I'm young for it but I GUARANTEE you it's my first choice for my next move. I'm always promoting that here.

Maybe I'll move to Indiana.

That equity payment is good. I think here in my area of FL it starts at $80K for a small condo sized unit. And the monthly starts at around $2200. But most people start out in Independent so they're there longer, overall.

Maybe your place is different but where I work, they accept you for lifetime care not 5-7 years. Then if you suffer an unforeseeable inability to pay, their charitable arm kicks in and pays for you.

Developers are at the mercy of growth restrictions, zoning, impact fees and other government created expenses so they can't really just decide to build "affordable housing". Another one of my rants. AFFORDABLE housing is at the root of MOST of our societal and financial problems. Not EASY MORTGAGE MONEY - which is the devil.
Thanks for such a nice, informative post. My two siblings and I are in uncharted territory and finding our way through it all, doing the best for our Mom.

It's given me the push to have all my affairs in order for our son; while Dad had most things in order, there have been a few loose ends.

As for houses in retirement, after retiring my parents had their dream log cabin in the NC mountains, next a condo in Asheville and finally a SFH in Indiana. They were happy in all three, teaching me nothing is forever and to change when the need or wants arises when possible. I don't look at any house as THE house, just the one I'm in now.
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Old 11-05-2016, 05:33 PM
 
Location: Ashland, Oregon
255 posts, read 133,108 times
Reputation: 484
Quote:
Originally Posted by BellaDL View Post
We want to downsize from 3200 sq. ft home to ~ 1800 sq. ft but have had no luck of finding small to medium size newish homes with acreage in all the areas that we have considered (Vancouver WA, Olympic Pennisula, Boise/Nampa and currently Spokane/CDA).

All the nice newer existing homes have 4 or more bedrooms, 3 or more bathrooms, 3500 or more sq. ft.

Small newer homes meeting our criteria (2-3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, 1600-2400 sq. ft on minimum 1 A lot) do exist but for whatever reasons, they are located in small rural towns, too far from our key locations (an airport and a rowing club - this means near a medium or big size town/city).

We have thought of just buying a lot and have a house built to our criteria/needs. The problem is that it is difficult to find an attractive lot with mature trees and nice view.

We also prefer a single story home but it is cheaper for builder to build multi-stories houses.

We have been searching for about 2 years but don't have much hope in finding one fitting our criteria. We may end up having to buy a house bigger than what we need or want!
This is what I have found also. My sister lives on her own and her kids are all grown up and out. She just sold her 3,200 square-foot house and is staying in a beach cottage, for now, with her two dogs.

Everyone tells her she should move into a town house. Well, most town houses have stairs, which she doesn't want. She also likes to open the door to let the dogs out in the yard, which won't be possible in a town house. What she would like (me, too, eventually) is a one-story, 3/2 house on a reasonable, fenced in piece of property.

Land costs are high where she lives so anything being built is ENORMOUS, as are the taxes.

The baby-boom generation will be moving out of those enormous homes at some point, and unless they want to live in town houses (not everyone does), I don't know what will happen. Not everyone wants to sell up and move to Florida, either.

Our 2,500 square-foot house is too big for us but we have the issue with visiting family, so we're going to stick it out.
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Old 11-05-2016, 05:59 PM
 
2,498 posts, read 2,534,769 times
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I down-sized to 1,050 with an attached garage and a garden shed. Suits me well.

Although I get company 6 or 8 weeks a year, that leaves 42 to 44 weeks when I really don't need a lot of space. I've been here three years and no one has cancelled a visit. We do joke that it's like camping with heat and water, though. I keep a list of nice vacation rentals and give people the option of getting one if they would be uncomfortable here.

I have one relative and their spouse that never stay with anyone. They get a hotel room and spend the days with me.
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Old 11-05-2016, 07:16 PM
 
6,640 posts, read 3,758,794 times
Reputation: 13720
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clemencia53 View Post
I would like to move to a smaller more modern home. Ours was built in the 1920s. Cute and all, but doorways are too small, lots of maintenance, super huge yard. I don't even go into parts of it.

Once my animal population decreases I will make the move.
You may be shocked and disappointed at the difference in the quality of the build. I sold a 1953 home and am looking for a replacement retirement home. The newer homes are good in that they are up to code, the plumbing is up to code, and everything is new, but boy, the quality of build is sure less. The floors are laminate, the tubs are those fiberglass or acrylic cheapo surround deals that will change colors as they age, no molding around windows, lots of all-electric homes (it costs more to install gas), the quality of ceramic tile work is not what the tradesmen did back in the day. Flimsy this, flimsy that. It may be different for more expensive homes. I'm looking in the range of middle class homes (middle management or beginning executive homes).
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Old 11-05-2016, 09:00 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,633 posts, read 17,606,575 times
Reputation: 27701
Quote:
Originally Posted by homeonthelittlemountain View Post
An odd observation...."failing health going into their 60s." I'm 58 and know very few people my age in failing health. Why are your 60s parents and friends in poor health? As you mentioned previously having lived in an affluent area of Indiana, I'm assuming you are now residing in a more impoverished area in Tennessee? Does that account for the poor health amongst your parent's generation?

At any rate....I'm 58, my husband is 64. We downsized last year from 3000 sq ft. in the city to 2900 sq ft in the country. But we primarily live in 1600 sq. ft on the upper level of the the two level rancher we bought.

Although we have a beautiful walk out basement family room/fireplace and MIL suite on the bottom level, we do most of our living on the upper level. This gives us all kinds of flexibility for visiting family.

As far as upkeep.....it's minimal. It is a 65 year old home with solid brick exterior, new roof, vinyl trim, newish mechanical systems. The yard is larger but landscaping services charge less here. We had several overgrown gardens and shrubs removed and had grass planted to ease yard maintenance.

Big two car garage with an entrance directly into the kitchen with only one small step.

Our utilities are half of what they were in the city. All in all, it's much less expensive than many HOA fees. So, square footage isn't much different but we feel we've downsized in a big way.
I had to leave and didn't get to finish typing previous reply and left you open in my browser tab.

Basements can be useful if they do not attract moisture and are properly dehumidified, and if you do not have to get up and down the stairs for required tasks.

I am looking for a townhome on one level, preferably an end unit, with no basement or stairs. Hard to find around here.
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Old 11-06-2016, 09:48 AM
 
6,326 posts, read 5,069,672 times
Reputation: 12854
Quote:
Originally Posted by bpollen View Post
You may be shocked and disappointed at the difference in the quality of the build. I sold a 1953 home and am looking for a replacement retirement home. The newer homes are good in that they are up to code, the plumbing is up to code, and everything is new, but boy, the quality of build is sure less. The floors are laminate, the tubs are those fiberglass or acrylic cheapo surround deals that will change colors as they age, no molding around windows, lots of all-electric homes (it costs more to install gas), the quality of ceramic tile work is not what the tradesmen did back in the day. Flimsy this, flimsy that. It may be different for more expensive homes. I'm looking in the range of middle class homes (middle management or beginning executive homes).
yea - I wonder about not having a gas stove or water heater. When our power goes out, we can at least use the stove. But then, I really don't want to do much cooking.

Its a big decision.

I mention the doorways, because we always have to finagle things around when we buy an appliance or want to move things.

And then I get morbid and wonder if a stretcher would fit in case we ever had to call 911 - lol!
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Old 11-06-2016, 10:59 AM
 
11,185 posts, read 10,224,422 times
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Interesting thread and thoughts about the subject. I tend to believe that people remain in their large home has less to do with the size of the home and more to do with memories. Holidays, birthdays, and general family gatherings. Lots of memorable times shared there and people, at least the people I know, are attached to the memories. For example, the back of one particular door that hasn't been painted in decades because it still marks little Johnny and Jenny's growth from age two until 18.

The only obstacle I could see being a real problem (in future years) is stairs. Whether they lead up to the bedrooms or down to the basement. Yes, those could be problematic when you're in your 80's. Of course, a serious health issue that inhibits mobility would mean changes in living arrangements but if someone is still reasonably healthy, there's no reason to move. Could be that they also have no mortgage, either. Nothing nicer than being at an age where you can live in a place you like without that nasty monthly payment.
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Old 11-06-2016, 04:41 PM
 
Location: too far from the sea
19,874 posts, read 18,888,113 times
Reputation: 33802
I guess we've seen that some of what you want in a house is due to what you had or did not have when you were growing up. If you had nothing, you may compensate by wanting a huge house. Or you may just want a huge house for some other reason.

If you grew up in a large house in an affluent suburb, you've already been there, done that. A little house could be just fine. If you grew up in an average house, you might still be happy with a similar house. Nothing to prove, no need to compensate either way either.

Also, some people want two homes in retirement. I might have except I saw what my parents went through every year with a New England house and a Florida house--my mother would be in one house worrying about the other house And she got stuck doing the packing and planning. More than that, I like traveling rather than going to another house for one part of the year.

I'm content with a very small house with a small yard and garden--I've had more than enough big gardens to care for. Next will be a small apartment with small garden space--I now just want to specialize in a few types of roses and dh can have his prize tuberous begonias. We'll probably have a few vegetable plants in containers. That is it!

At this stage (and you do find that retirement goes in stages) I want to keep traveling as long as possible, live in a town that has more amenities than way out here by the beach, and hopefully have some family nearby. Hospitals too, as we are older than many on here.
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Old 11-08-2016, 05:15 AM
 
Location: Colorado Springs
4,851 posts, read 4,967,060 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HereOnMars View Post
Interesting thread and thoughts about the subject. I tend to believe that people remain in their large home has less to do with the size of the home and more to do with memories. Holidays, birthdays, and general family gatherings. Lots of memorable times shared there and people, at least the people I know, are attached to the memories. For example, the back of one particular door that hasn't been painted in decades because it still marks little Johnny and Jenny's growth from age two until 18.

The only obstacle I could see being a real problem (in future years) is stairs. Whether they lead up to the bedrooms or down to the basement. Yes, those could be problematic when you're in your 80's. Of course, a serious health issue that inhibits mobility would mean changes in living arrangements but if someone is still reasonably healthy, there's no reason to move. Could be that they also have no mortgage, either. Nothing nicer than being at an age where you can live in a place you like without that nasty monthly payment.
^^^That's pretty much it.

One more thing is that many people near retirement are likely in about their 4th house. That one evolved as a result of experiences from house #1 through #3. The features we liked in earlier houses were incorporated into the design of #4. You finally own your "perfect" house. So why move?

At this point in my life I prefer to enjoy living in a house that I designed just for me. It's paid off. I planned it that way. Yes, it's too big. As if I care....
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Old 11-08-2016, 09:13 AM
 
13,964 posts, read 7,434,967 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vision67 View Post
You finally own your "perfect" house. So why move?
Many people move because they retire and can't afford the ownership costs of the house they're living in. Other than California, the property taxes in the leafy suburbs of the high cost of living areas with all the jobs are enormous and keep going up as the home appreciates. I used to own one of those. It would today have a $20,000 property tax plus all the ownership costs of a large house on a big lot.

My definition of "perfect" house changed. At age 58, "perfect" means I'll be able to afford to own it when I'm retired. $5,000 to $6,000 in ownership costs. Not $30,000+.
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