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Old 12-15-2016, 12:33 PM
 
Location: SoCal
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Throw them a wedding but say no to marriage. Living in sin is great at that age.
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Old 12-15-2016, 12:37 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
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It is likely illegal to impersonate/falsely issue marriage documents and extremely unethical. I can't believe someone 65 years of age would do something this juvenile.
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Old 12-15-2016, 01:52 PM
 
Location: Pennsylvania
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I wonder what would happen if they had a religious but not legal ceremony?
Just doesn't seem right to me.
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Old 12-15-2016, 02:15 PM
 
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A few thoughts come to mind---


If you should ever need to go to a competency hearing to gain POA, the "fake marriage" might come out. What's that old saying--what a tangled web we weave, when we first practice to deceive?"


Forging a marriage license is forging a state document, who knows where that could land you?


If they live together as man & wife, it could be considered a common-law marriage in many states, you need to look into that angle.




Personally, I wouldn't go that route. Perhaps you could have some sort of life-partner ceremony? Maybe talk to a clergy, or social worker, see if they could devise a ceremony to recognize the couples' commitment to each other, without involving legal issues?
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Old 12-15-2016, 02:17 PM
 
Location: Planet Woof
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I'd suggest a religious ceremony and skip the license. Try to convince them based on your financial points. If not, then I'd be tempted to do whatever is in their best interest in the long run.
Another point to consider is the possibility that if they legally married and one of them eventually went on Medicaid in skilled nursing, they could lose a lot more in the long run. Here you'd want to consult an Elderlaw attorney for Medicaid/Estate planning. That info might convince mom to be practical.
As a social worker in health care I actually had patients getting divorced so that one could get on Medicaid for dialysis, for example.
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Old 12-15-2016, 02:26 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by caco54 View Post
If both "families" have POA and agree to this (in everyone's best interest) deception I don't see an issue. Will the facility go along with the rouse?


The facility could NOT legally go along with the rouse. Also, I was thinking, it might not be such a good idea for the facility to be involved. Who processes their benefits? You might have the facility inform Social Security, Medicare, etc of the "marriage" assuming the facility has possession of the fake marriage license. If they do not have possession of the ML, they will surely know of the ceremony, etc, and ask for a ML, then what? The facility is probably legally obliged to inform benefit providers of any changes in their residents status.


Also, what about income tax filing?


The whole thing could turn into quite a mess, best not, IMO
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Old 12-15-2016, 02:46 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
17,124 posts, read 17,446,597 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FeelinLow View Post
I'd suggest a religious ceremony and skip the license. Try to convince them based on your financial points. If not, then I'd be tempted to do whatever is in their best interest in the long run.
Another point to consider is the possibility that if they legally married and one of them eventually went on Medicaid in skilled nursing, they could lose a lot more in the long run. Here you'd want to consult an Elderlaw attorney for Medicaid/Estate planning. That info might convince mom to be practical.

As a social worker in health care I actually had patients getting divorced so that one could get on Medicaid for dialysis, for example.
I personally know more than one couple who got divorced legally, but never told others (including keeping it secret from their children & grandchildren), continued living together, etc. etc. They did it for various medical or financial reasons or a combination of both.
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Old 12-15-2016, 02:56 PM
 
Location: Lakewood OH
21,698 posts, read 23,722,260 times
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Faking legal documents is a criminal offense. Think of the heartbreak it will cause for these two people if and when something happens as it's bound to and they discover it's all been a sham.

I think what your friend is thinking about doing is very wrong.
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Old 12-15-2016, 03:07 PM
 
3,458 posts, read 2,348,252 times
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I do not think it is OK to trick them. If they are not incompetent, they are capable of making their own decisions.

The ramifications of the sham marriage are wide, and don't just include financial considerations. What if one of them becomes terminally ill and the other one insists they can make medical decisions as the person's legal spouse? What happens when they are told no, you do not have the right because you are not legally married?

Deception is never a good idea and can quickly spiral into a nightmare of lies, nested lies, cover-ups, etc.
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Old 12-15-2016, 03:14 PM
 
9,703 posts, read 15,912,317 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FeelinLow View Post
I'd suggest a religious ceremony and skip the license. Try to convince them based on your financial points. If not, then I'd be tempted to do whatever is in their best interest in the long run.
Another point to consider is the possibility that if they legally married and one of them eventually went on Medicaid in skilled nursing, they could lose a lot more in the long run. Here you'd want to consult an Elderlaw attorney for Medicaid/Estate planning. That info might convince mom to be practical.
As a social worker in health care I actually had patients getting divorced so that one could get on Medicaid for dialysis, for example.


How sad! Yet I can see how it could happen....
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