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Old 01-09-2017, 05:05 PM
 
34,389 posts, read 41,490,319 times
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Brother called tonight to just say hi and ask how my medical condition is coming along, i couldnt resist asking him about the estate, he says the house is on the market but needs a new roof which presents a problem with the insurance so the house will be slightly devalued to accommodate a new roof. 'he says there is a will and the value of the house is to be split 3 ways with him keeping the car and all contents of the house which is fair and fine by me.
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Old 01-09-2017, 05:20 PM
 
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 18,982,141 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jambo101 View Post
Brother called tonight to just say hi and ask how my medical condition is coming along, i couldnt resist asking him about the estate, he says the house is on the market but needs a new roof which presents a problem with the insurance so the house will be slightly devalued to accommodate a new roof. 'he says there is a will and the value of the house is to be split 3 ways with him keeping the car and all contents of the house which is fair and fine by me.
I hope it's a fine house that you can make use of!

Otherwise spiff it up, stage it with select furniture and green plants, and maybe sell it yourself. (Your brother should take all wall deco, displayed photos, and knickknacks now!)
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Old 01-09-2017, 05:54 PM
 
Location: Henderson, NV
889 posts, read 586,342 times
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Great to hear you talked to your brother. It sounds like things are on track. It had to feel good to have him call you before you called him. I hope it works out for all of you.
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Old 01-09-2017, 05:56 PM
 
Location: Seattle/Dahlonega
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If your happy, we're happy
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Old 01-09-2017, 06:10 PM
 
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
22,608 posts, read 39,974,527 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jambo101 View Post
Brother called tonight to just say hi ... 'he says there is a will and the value of the house is to be split 3 ways with him keeping the car and all contents of the house which is fair and fine by me.

OP - Sounds like you have a good answer! Bro gets kudos for keeping up with the details, including new roof / realtors and lawyers (and still caring that you are even alive!, wouldn't happen in my family!)

for 'other readers' / When and how to talk about inheritance
1) sooner than later, age 80 (or 40) my be too late
2) AFTER your $5m life insurance policy expires (to avoid 'conflict of interest')
3) before your FINAL recitement / drafting of will or trust disbursement instructions.
4) In the presence of all heirs (or at least direct family members, as possible)
5) Early / late enough to make changes (based on situations that change, usually a subsequent marriage / adult kid / grandkid with LTC need )
6) AFTER general direction from your astute estate planning attorney

We did our distributions in our late 30's to our family foundation and donor advised fund.
The heirs / kids get to manage the future distributions (gifting)

I got my parent's 'estate' distribution in the form of a bunch of bills they owed (to friends and family). I worked 3 jobs @ $2 - $4 / hour and had it paid off within a few yrs, and BEFORE I started having kids. (good thing)
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Old 01-09-2017, 07:19 PM
 
7,185 posts, read 2,756,317 times
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Originally Posted by jambo101 View Post
Dad and bro live in Florida,i live in Canada ,brother is the executor of the will.Dad and bro were tight me not so much due to distance,i want to avoid coming off like i only care about the money which at this point i guess i do.
If you are named in the will, the attorney should provide you with a copy of it. If you were not named in the will, you are not an interested party to the will. You would have to get your own lawyer to try to fight the will in that case.
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Old 01-10-2017, 03:08 AM
 
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My brother is in Florida and i'm in Montreal so i cant participate in any meaningful way to help him deal with the estate.
I see to many of my friends develop hostile issues with their siblings when it comes to splitting up the estate ,i dont want that happening in my case so i'm reluctant to approach my brother with demands ultimatums and lawyers at this point,for now everything is amicable and hes doing the best he can.
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Old 01-10-2017, 07:45 AM
 
29,782 posts, read 34,876,173 times
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With both of my parents my sister did all of the heavy lifting which was quite a bit. She was local, I wasn't and work was a factor as responsibility didn't end if I wasn't there. Was there money probably! Did she get defensive when I didn't even ask any questions? Yup! I got one small insurance payout that was required by the company as I was named. How much was there? I have no idea! Was there anything? I have no idea! Did I ever ask? Nope! Was alright if she got it all as she did the heavy lifting. I knew my dad had money but with much medical care and mom in nursing care for years who knows. Home sale profit? Who knows!

My sister has passed and any money she did have left was consumed by the nursing home. She passed days after the money ran out and she was due to go on Medicaid. If it bought her peace of mind cool. She became a widow at about age 50 and deserved what ever. Let he who serves reap the rewards. I was close to my parents especially my dad, but just not the sort you want to help you out when aged. Fortunately they had my sister.
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Old 01-10-2017, 07:54 AM
 
Location: Central Mexico and Central Florida
7,108 posts, read 3,465,006 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jambo101 View Post
My brother is in Florida and i'm in Montreal so i cant participate in any meaningful way to help him deal with the estate.
I see to many of my friends develop hostile issues with their siblings when it comes to splitting up the estate ,i dont want that happening in my case so i'm reluctant to approach my brother with demands ultimatums and lawyers at this point,for now everything is amicable and hes doing the best he can.
It's good you've made contact.

To give you a timeline:
My DH was both successor trustee (for trust items) and executor (for items not in trust, covered by the will...and probate court).

The entire estate was well over $1 million and included the house and its furnishings, savings and checking at banks, mutual funds held by a brokerage, 401K's, IRAs, US government pension that still had undistributed basis, insurance policies both term and whole life, stock held directly by his Dad (not in mutual funds or 401Ks), a purchased annuity, cemetery plots (8) that would not be used by him.

My FIL died in early August and my DH wrapped up the entire estate by late November. Most of the monies were distributed to heirs by October. The first and final trust tax return was filed in December (but everything that was taxable (gains on stock between DOD and liquidation) flowed through to the trustees (all the siblings). Final probate filing couldn't be done until 6 months after it opened (Virginia), but DH kept a few thousand on hand in checking account for that, just in case.

FYI, my DH did NOT retain any payment/commission for himself (was allowed to do that by trust and by will and probate court).
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Old 01-11-2017, 06:00 PM
 
10,236 posts, read 12,262,593 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jambo101 View Post
My brother is in Florida and i'm in Montreal so i cant participate in any meaningful way to help him deal with the estate.
I see to many of my friends develop hostile issues with their siblings when it comes to splitting up the estate ,i dont want that happening in my case so i'm reluctant to approach my brother with demands ultimatums and lawyers at this point,for now everything is amicable and hes doing the best he can.
what county in FL will the estate be handled? Post the county and I will find you the link to that county's official records so you can privately search your dad's name to see what has been happening.
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