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Old 02-01-2017, 01:55 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,560 posts, read 17,544,804 times
Reputation: 27613

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Quote:
Originally Posted by StealthRabbit View Post
Working (for others).
If you are working too much, you are getting Overtime, if not, get a job that compensates for actual hours worked.

If you are stuck on salary, find a different career field or a different position (skilled trades usually pays well for time invested).

If you have an employer that has a "no-moonlighting' clause, then they better be paying you REAL well, especially if 'on call'.

You should NEVER work 2 jobs at same time in a similar industries (I.e. conflict of interest / non-compete). (how BORING!) yuck, one job at a time in a particular field is enough to get sick of REAL quick.

Multiple jobs gives you LOTS of variety, recharge, opportunities for pay increases and career changes. And it helps to narrow down the choices for most effectively using your time.
Again, it's not that simple.

I'm a mid-level IT employee. It is going to be very difficult to find an employer that is willing to pay a mid-level IT person an hourly wage, largely due to the nature of the work - almost all staff level administrators, engineers, and more senior lead/management roles are salaried. You can go down the "consultant" route or work contracts where you'd get a per-hour wage, but that is another bag of worms.

I could take an hourly job, but that probably means cutting my pay in half. It's not completely an issue of one bad employer - this is the way it is virtually across the board in the industry.

Retraining for a different career that is more hourly/job based is going to depend on how practical it is for the individual.
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Old 02-01-2017, 02:43 PM
 
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
22,545 posts, read 39,924,861 times
Reputation: 23653
Quote:
Originally Posted by Serious Conversation View Post
Again, it's not that simple.

I'm a mid-level IT employee. ....
We all dig our own graves, do it NOW if you like... (while you are young).

Most of us did not have the golden platter, so we did what was necessary. Excuses are fine (and frequent), as long as you are willing to live with your choices. 40+ yrs in high tech and I had to make a lot of choices about pay / work positions. Some were good for me (financially), some were not (for which I paid dearly).

You will eventually learn that life is a process, and the choices are yours (you OWN them).
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Old 02-02-2017, 06:38 AM
mlb
 
Location: North Monterey County
3,178 posts, read 2,853,807 times
Reputation: 4876
My parents were decidedly midwestern middle class. That said - in the 1970's they moved to their dream home. They were all about stuff - not so much hording it - but having just enough and that of high quality that it did not wear out after a short time.

When I look at how much of that "stuff" went by the wayside after dad died (at 80) and mom continued on until she passed at 94 almost 15 years after dad..... I am humbled. My mom's assisted living room housed the dresser she and dad shared most of their married lives. One of her most treasured pictures was up on the wall - a comfy chair from home for those of us who visited - as mom was bedridden and non-ambulatory. That's it. Everything else fell to the wayside.

You don't need stuff. Stuff won't make you happy. Get rid of it now - before it becomes more important than the people around you.

I will heed that lesson and downsize before our next move in a couple of years.
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Old 02-03-2017, 10:08 AM
 
5,619 posts, read 8,548,332 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mlb View Post
. They were all about stuff - not so much hording it - but having just enough and that of high quality that it did not wear out after a short time.

.

You don't need stuff. Stuff won't make you happy. Get rid of it now
Meh: yes and no.

I get much happyness/enjoyment out of my beekeeping stuff, my canning stuff, my box of tanning "stuff", reloading, etc.

Not getting rifle of those tools/stuff any time soon!
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Old 02-06-2017, 02:20 AM
 
479 posts, read 399,299 times
Reputation: 2070
I find this story utterly tragic. All this tells me is that when you go into assisted living, there is no room for your treasures any more, and you will have to live like a monk or a nun. It certainly doesn't convince me that I need to start living like a monk right now. Or that living like a monk will somehow make me focus more on people.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mlb View Post
My mom's assisted living room housed the dresser she and dad shared most of their married lives. One of her most treasured pictures was up on the wall - a comfy chair from home for those of us who visited - as mom was bedridden and non-ambulatory. That's it. Everything else fell to the wayside.

You don't need stuff. Stuff won't make you happy. Get rid of it now - before it becomes more important than the people around you.

.
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Old 02-06-2017, 02:48 PM
 
Location: Lakewood OH
21,699 posts, read 23,655,251 times
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After moving cross country and then cross town, I kept getting rid of more and more stuff. But I learned a lesson that's not always the best thing to do.

Most of the stuff I don't mind having gotten rid of but I was too zealous and I miss a few things.

So my rule of thumb now is; if you still use it, think you still need it, and it still makes you happy, keep it. Don't get rid of stuff just to get rid of stuff. Sometimes that can leave an empty hole in your heart besides your living space.
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Old 02-06-2017, 06:34 PM
 
14,258 posts, read 23,979,216 times
Reputation: 20048
^^

Agreed.

If you bring it with you and decide that you don't need it, you can always donate ot at the new location.
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Old 02-07-2017, 09:13 AM
mlb
 
Location: North Monterey County
3,178 posts, read 2,853,807 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yourown2feet View Post
I find this story utterly tragic. All this tells me is that when you go into assisted living, there is no room for your treasures any more, and you will have to live like a monk or a nun. It certainly doesn't convince me that I need to start living like a monk right now. Or that living like a monk will somehow make me focus more on people.

When was the last time you visited a nursing home / assisted living?

If you need medical attention - like my mother did - you do have to give up your "treasures".

At least she didn't share a room.
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Old 02-07-2017, 10:43 AM
 
20,534 posts, read 16,611,821 times
Reputation: 38560
Quote:
Originally Posted by yourown2feet View Post
I find this story utterly tragic. All this tells me is that when you go into assisted living, there is no room for your treasures any more, and you will have to live like a monk or a nun. It certainly doesn't convince me that I need to start living like a monk right now. Or that living like a monk will somehow make me focus more on people.

It's not just about assisted living, anyone who downsizes even if it's to go from a house to a condo when old will have to get rid of 40-50 years of crap in the attic, old dishes, Christmas balls, etc, etc etc. My mom had boxes of checks in the attic that were from the 70's. she had old things that she took from my grandmothers attic right to hers when HER time came. She had the paper Halloween decorations we put up when we were kids (I'm 54 now), she had typewriters and her old Avon suitcase, and a bonnet hairdryer. No one needs this stuff and it is VERY time-consuming to go through it all and figure out what's important and what's not. I had to do this for my mom because she was unable to. OP and his wife just did it for his parents, and lamented how much time is involved.


All OP wants to know is who did this for others without kids when the time came they needed to downsize. No one is saying get rid of things you love and still use, just the crap that accumulates when you've lived in a home and raised children in it for decades. Who said live like a monk?
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Old 05-27-2017, 08:50 PM
 
5 posts, read 2,278 times
Reputation: 32
Default Consider moving to Mexico

Quote:
Originally Posted by TwoByFour View Post
Anyone else in this situation? Former DINKs (dual income, no kids) now retired, which is fine, but I am wondering what our plan is when we get to 80, 85 and need to move or we have a medical event that would normally have family pitching in to help out. My wife and I packed up our parents like all kids do, so we need to figure out what we do when we are at the point of needing help.

You hear about elderly people who are alone getting taken advantage of because they have nobody to turn to and become vulnerable. I worry about that, especially for my wife if I die before her.


What are others doing?
Many expats have chosen to move to Mexico for their retirement years. It is not for everyone. Mostly for the adventurous and those who do not watch Constantly Negative News. I am not a DINK but a SINK. I was out having dinner with a few friends the other night celebrating a birthday. I happened to sit beside another single income, no kids, person and we are both retired in Mexico. We agreed that we both love our life here. We can afford maids and gardeners and we get to do the things we have always wanted to do but never had the time, money, nor freedom to do. My "SINK" friend was telling me that her gardener has now become her chauffeur as she can no longer drive. He not only does her gardening but drives her anywhere she needs to go and does so with her car. He will inherit her car when she dies. He has been working for her for 14 years now. He and his whole family are part of her family. As for her maid, who also has been working many years for her had a few difficult years way back, was renting, and was moving around a lot with two kids. My friend became very concerned about her well being, etc. Linda decided to take care of the family situation, she found a very cheap house she could afford to buy in a Mexican neighborhood and let her maid and her children live in it. The maid will inherit the house when she dies. It is very common here for the loyal help to become part of the family. Very often, they end up taking care of us. My maid who cleans, cooks, washes and irons my clothes is part of my family. She is very loyal, loving, kind and always looks out for me. I have heard multiple like stories. Moving to Mexico is an affordable option. But it is certainly not an option for everyone.

Individual and assisted living homes are thriving in this community. Expats are even getting into the business. A year and a half ago, one of the Assisted Living facility, Abbeyfield, was featured on a PBS special. Doctors and nurses are readily available. Home visits by doctors and nurses are still the norm. It is worth investigating.
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