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Old 02-26-2017, 10:15 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,216 posts, read 6,320,879 times
Reputation: 9827

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Quote:
Originally Posted by mathjak107 View Post
they both better or you became a financial burden to one of them which is something i would never want to do to any of our kids . nothing breaks up a family and a marriage quicker .

just wait until one kid steps up to the plate and the others step back . that has busted up more siblings in fights and hostility than anything else .

when a spouse is involved it can never end well when they start with why are we being burdened and your brothers and sisters do nothing ?
I don't know about that. One of my brothers did step up to help my mom but not financially. Financially, We all chipped in but he did the most in terms of taking her to doctors and such.
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Old 02-26-2017, 10:18 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,216 posts, read 6,320,879 times
Reputation: 9827
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nightengale212 View Post
You are kidding right ???

I work with a physician who is married to an engineer. They had one child a son who is currently age 24. This kid is brilliant, graduated two years early as valedictorian from an academically demanding private high school. He was immediately accepted into MIT at age 16 and went on to graduate from there in 3 years instead of the traditional 4 in the top ten of his class. Before he even graduated from MIT he was offered a job with a small Boston based hedge fund company where he still works. This kid's current salary after 5 years working for this company is greater than the combined income of his physician mother and engineer father which I suspect is in the $400,000/year range. This kid is probably on the path to becoming a billionaire not just from the income he earns but the work that he does which is investing.

Having an exceptional kid like this is rare as is having a kid like Tom Brady who is an exceptional athlete which both will likely become billionaires in their lifetimes which I suspect Tom is already. Most of us have perfectly wonderful average kids, and although they may prove to be more financially successful than us, they too have to fund their own retirements which may prove to be a more daunting task than what we had to do to fund ours. I highly doubt that most of our kids are expecting us to fund their retirements so why should we expect our kids to supplement ours ???
Of course, I'm always kidding. The term billionaire is the cue.
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Old 02-26-2017, 10:20 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,216 posts, read 6,320,879 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom View Post
Dang. Really? That's pretty sad.
Why is it sad? It's been that way for years in many culture.
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Old 02-26-2017, 10:28 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,216 posts, read 6,320,879 times
Reputation: 9827
Quote:
Originally Posted by reneeh63 View Post
Most people don't PLAN to run out of money so I suppose, if you have kids, you figure if the worst possible thing happens and you've done everything in your own power then there's the chance your kids will step in. I may be speaking for NewbieHere but I'd wager they aren't just living the good life now saying the kids will handle everything later!

I mean, when you've done EVERYTHING you can, you hope your kids will do SOMETHING, right - what else is there? It's not so much a plan as a hope or a wish... I mean in my case, with no kids, if all my savings and plans go awry I guess I'll have to "count on" the kindness of strangers! - but I'm not planning on it!
Actually, one kid has said she will send money back f I need them but she will not be physically taking care of me. The other one will take care of me or her dad but she isn't making a lot of money. She has potential but it's not there yet. She has said she would have a grandfather space in her back yard. She is very good at taking care of people. It's in her nature. She took care of me when I was sick, she was barely 13.
But all kidding aside, I think she will be managing money for either of us, when we will unable to. Maybe hire people to care for us. And that's my hope.
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Old 02-26-2017, 10:48 AM
 
Location: Knoxville, TN
1,246 posts, read 589,161 times
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Look around at your middle class neighbors. I think a lot of people would be surprised at how many of their parents are in government-subsidized senior housing. With so few people getting pensions, as the baby boomers all retire, there will not be enough subsidized housing available for all of the ones who will be relying on social security as their primary source of income. It is going to be a major problem.
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Old 02-26-2017, 10:59 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,216 posts, read 6,320,879 times
Reputation: 9827
When I was a teenager, I was working for this lady, doing odd jobs and such, she was living in her son's garage. He built and made it comfortable for her. I think people willlearn how to make do especially tight knit culture.
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Old 02-26-2017, 11:01 AM
 
1,168 posts, read 2,401,550 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NewbieHere View Post
Actually, one kid has said she will send money back f I need them but she will not be physically taking care of me. The other one will take care of me or her dad but she isn't making a lot of money. She has potential but it's not there yet. She has said she would have a grandfather space in her back yard. She is very good at taking care of people. It's in her nature. She took care of me when I was sick, she was barely 13.
But all kidding aside, I think she will be managing money for either of us, when we will unable to. Maybe hire people to care for us. And that's my hope.
pretty sure that means to bury you- not take care of you........
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Old 02-26-2017, 11:22 AM
 
13,883 posts, read 7,395,585 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Travelassie View Post
Yes. My mother. She still brings in around $1400/month in SS, spends much of that in monthly payments to the ALF she lives in (her choice), and my husband and I pick up the rest of her expenses, needs, wants.
Where in the country can you find an assisted living facility at a non-frightening place for $1,400/month? Pretty much anyone in assisted living needs meals and med management. Around me, a studio with those services at the cheapest possible place is $4,000. If you start layering on bathing (next most common), incontinence management, dressing, etc, it shoots up from there.

I manage my mother's affairs. She's in assisted living with severe short term memory loss issues. At her current burn rate, she's out of money in four years. I can't predict the future. All I can do is contingency plan. Right now, I'd rather spend her money to give her the best possible quality of life while she's able to live it. Worst case, my sister and I pick up that expense for a number of years.
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Old 02-26-2017, 11:26 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,216 posts, read 6,320,879 times
Reputation: 9827
Quote:
Originally Posted by exit82 View Post
pretty sure that means to bury you- not take care of you........
Please, there is no need to be snarky. Such nastiness should not exist for any decent human being.
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Old 02-26-2017, 11:27 AM
 
Location: Wasilla, AK
7,240 posts, read 4,132,331 times
Reputation: 15619
Quote:
Originally Posted by jasperhobbs View Post
What is ALF?

This TV show back in the 80's and/or 90's.
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