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Old 03-09-2017, 07:15 AM
 
Location: 26°N x 82°W
1,066 posts, read 766,202 times
Reputation: 2007

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Quote:
Originally Posted by WSPHXPELON View Post
¡Andale, póngase a estudiar! En el tiempo que tomó para escribir todo esto pudo haber tomado un curso entero de Español! Jaja nomás estoy jugando...Espero estar jubilado algún dia como usted, saludos! =)
Had to use the Spanish to English translation, was faster than it took for you to type it maybe? Good luck to you.
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Old 03-09-2017, 08:26 AM
 
Location: TN/NC
35,066 posts, read 31,293,790 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
It's not a contest.

It's always good to hear people's stories of what retired life is for them. We all have different personalities, different interests, different energy levels, etc. Although I believe that branching out into new experiences is good for us in general, perhaps it is also good to remind oursleves that it's not a contest. If someone finds joy and fulfillment in a feverish round of traveling and other activities, then that is just great, but it's not a contest, so others might just be stressed and unhappy trying to emulate the super-active ones.

The opposite extreme is unhealthy in my opinion: social isolation, couch potato existence, watching TV all day every day, no purpose at all. If someone claims that's what they really want, I'm just not buying it.

I have settled into a routine of a few different activities containing some variety which I find gratifying in different ways: working with young people in the schools as a volunteer three days a week, being president of the HOA where I live (which has been a crusade to undo the previous tyanny), attendance at live classical music concerts a couple of times a month, lots of reading, and occasional traveling. So I don't think having a "routine" is necessarily bad provided it's not a stultifying one. My routine provides both enjoyment and variety. I'll never come close to winning the "activity" contest but that's O.K. because I'm not competing in it in the first place.
I'm sure some people get into the "contest" mindset, but as we all age, we realize there is less and less time to do the things we always wanted to do. I think it's more of a "cram it in while you still can" strategy than an active game of one-upmanship.

Think about it like this - if you retire at 60, there are only about fifteen years before you run up against the standard life expectancy. That seems like a lot of time, but it truly isn't. Does 9/11 seem like it was fifteen years ago? No, I remember 9/11 better than what I did last week. Out of those fifteen years from 60 to 75, the odds of becoming sick, frail, or just plain sudden death are likely higher than in the previous fifteen years. More days are behind you than ahead of you, and the quality of the days ahead of you is likely to be less than what you were previously used to. I don't see too many 80+ year olds engaged in vigorous outdoor activities or doing cross-country road trips hauling an RV.

I'm going through a bit of this myself now. I'll be 31 next month. I pissed away the first half of my 20s chasing useless women, playing computer games, boozing, not graduating from college on time, and generally being a layabout. I didn't get my first permanent job until I was 23 and don't even remember what I did during my off time over the two years I worked there. I didn't travel, take up a new hobby, etc., the years feel like a waste in hindsight.

I didn't even pull my head out of my butt until I was 25, moved across the country, and started developing new hobbies and interests. At 25, I was basically doing the same stuff I did at 15, except with a crummy full time job. I hadn't been further north than DC (went there in 8th grade), west of Nashville, or south of Charleston. Since 2012, I've been as far north as halfway up Maine and into the UP of Michigan, south to Naples, FL, west into Nebraska, and every east coast state save Delaware. I lived in TN, where this is excellent outdoor recreation, but never had an interest in anything outdoors until my mid 20s and living in flat Iowa.

It's stuff like this that makes you kick yourself and wonder why you didn't do that when you were younger and had fewer obligations. I have time to "make up for it" without that much impact, but really feel like I'm going to be 26 next month, psychologically and physically, not 31, because by now I'm supposed to be "settling down." For a retiree, there may not be the years (or sometimes the health) to really make up for it.

Most people before retirement are locked into a fairly standard routine out of necessity - get up, get some breakfast, go to work 9+ hours a day, come home/take care of kids/relax a bit, go to bed, repeat for four more days and have a weekend, often spent doing chores.
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Old 03-09-2017, 08:38 AM
 
Location: 26°N x 82°W
1,066 posts, read 766,202 times
Reputation: 2007
Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
The opposite extreme is unhealthy in my opinion: social isolation, couch potato existence, watching TV all day every day, no purpose at all. If someone claims that's what they really want, I'm just not buying it.
My in-laws chose to do this, it was terrible watching them wither away. We tried to get them out as much as possible, but eventually they became shut-ins and wouldn't go out... only going for food shopping or maybe a Dr. appt. And they became so bitter and pessimistic about everything that it was hard for us to visit them, bring dinner or whatever, for more than an hour.
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Old 03-09-2017, 09:02 AM
 
Location: TN/NC
35,066 posts, read 31,293,790 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by twowilldo View Post
My in-laws chose to do this, it was terrible watching them wither away. We tried to get them out as much as possible, but eventually they became shut-ins and wouldn't go out... only going for food shopping or maybe a Dr. appt. And they became so bitter and pessimistic about everything that it was hard for us to visit them, bring dinner or whatever, for more than an hour.
I don't like long-term, consistent idleness.

I've seen this play out in my own family. One set of grandparents were "idlers." When grandfather retired, he puttered around the garden occasionally, but didn't really develop any interests or hobbies. Went to church (same one for forty years), but never a deacon or anything. They never traveled except to Myrtle Beach once a year (always the same week, motel, and restaurants). Every day was mostly the same. Other than when he was drafted in the Korean War period, he lived in this same small town all his life. Grandfather was basically a shut-in and grandmother is becoming so now. Other set of grandparents were more into living life, but he was a bad alcoholic and she is a mean, vindictive person at times. Their lack of idleness was more due to their own dysfunction than anything else. He's since sobered up and she has some mild dementia, but they still take trips with the senior center, go out of the area with the kids some, go to the YMCA to exercise - they do more than the other set ever did.

Parents are much the same way as they enter their senior years. They haven't lived outside this same town for more than a year. The same restaurants, stores, same routine all the time. No interest in trying anything new, even locally - tried getting them to try a new BBQ restaurant with me last week and they absolutely wouldn't do it, even though they like BBQ. They haven't been on any kind of vacation in at least five years. Outside of occasional day trips to towns in the WNC mountains, they haven't been more than one hundred miles from here in any direction on their own volition in many years. The one exception were trips to Indiana and one to Iowa to see me when I lived there.

I see these same patterns in many locals and it boggles my mind. People never leaving the area, never traveling, doing very little, and upon old age, doing even less and less to the point of becoming virtually idle all the time and eventually, shut-ins.

By the time you reach your senior years, you are who you are. Absent some sort of eureka moment, people who are doing very little in old age will remain that way and waste away.
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Old 03-09-2017, 09:15 AM
 
Location: 26°N x 82°W
1,066 posts, read 766,202 times
Reputation: 2007
Quote:
Originally Posted by Serious Conversation View Post
I don't like long-term, consistent idleness.

I've seen this play out in my own family. One set of grandparents were "idlers." When grandfather retired, he puttered around the garden occasionally, but didn't really develop any interests or hobbies. Went to church (same one for forty years), but never a deacon or anything. They never traveled except to Myrtle Beach once a year (always the same week, motel, and restaurants). Every day was mostly the same. Other than when he was drafted in the Korean War period, he lived in this same small town all his life. Grandfather was basically a shut-in and grandmother is becoming so now. Other set of grandparents were more into living life, but he was a bad alcoholic and she is a mean, vindictive person at times. Their lack of idleness was more due to their own dysfunction than anything else. He's since sobered up and she has some mild dementia, but they still take trips with the senior center, go out of the area with the kids some, go to the YMCA to exercise - they do more than the other set ever did.

Parents are much the same way as they enter their senior years. They haven't lived outside this same town for more than a year. The same restaurants, stores, same routine all the time. No interest in trying anything new, even locally - tried getting them to try a new BBQ restaurant with me last week and they absolutely wouldn't do it, even though they like BBQ. They haven't been on any kind of vacation in at least five years. Outside of occasional day trips to towns in the WNC mountains, they haven't been more than one hundred miles from here in any direction on their own volition in many years. The one exception were trips to Indiana and one to Iowa to see me when I lived there.

I see these same patterns in many locals and it boggles my mind. People never leaving the area, never traveling, doing very little, and upon old age, doing even less and less to the point of becoming virtually idle all the time and eventually, shut-ins.

By the time you reach your senior years, you are who you are. Absent some sort of eureka moment, people who are doing very little in old age will remain that way and waste away.
Conversely my own mom (widowed 3 times, yikes) became an avid traveler at retirement age and made it to all 7 continents. She is slowing down a little bit at 89 but still gets out and does stuff locally. Her mom died just a few months short of turning 100, sharp as a tack mentally, gardened like a fiend, walked every day (sort of doddered like a drunken sailor toward the end so she used a cane). The two of them bickered constantly but I think it was actually beneficial for them both.

We can all see this playing out in family members and make conscious efforts to stay active both physically and mentally for sure.
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Old 03-09-2017, 09:36 AM
 
4,901 posts, read 8,754,455 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jrkliny View Post
No.




I traveled in the National Parks full time for a couple of years and several months at a time since then.
That sounds fun. I'd love to travel in a motorhome (sell everything else) for a couple of years, at least, and go all over the country. I'm not sure my husband has the temperament for it, though.
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Old 03-09-2017, 09:42 AM
 
Location: Delaware
242 posts, read 231,602 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Darth Vespa View Post

Anyway, what about others? Do you experience the same phenomenon in retirement?

After retirement my husband and I hit the ground running. We immediately began painting the entire home, and preparing it to sell. We did some traveling, which both of us really wanted to do. Now, settled in a new state, we're socializing with new friends, swimming, biking, playing pickle ball, singing in a community choir, painting and decorating our new home, growing gardens and enjoying every minute of it. There is still plenty that I want to do that I haven't gotten to yet....like emptying some boxes piled in the garage from the move but I figure, "What's the rush?" We haven't settled into a hard and fast routine, which is fine with me.
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Old 03-09-2017, 09:48 AM
 
Location: Chicago area
18,759 posts, read 11,794,120 times
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Retirement hasn't been much different then when we were working. We had ten days off every five weeks. We traveled, or worked on projects. We travel less now because of not being able to find the perfect pet sitter yet to replace the great one we had. We still do projects, but we have more time for fun. The fun times seem to interfere with the projects The best part of being retired is being able to do what ever you want to do whenever you want to do it. That's the biggest difference. I organized all of my photos years ago and cleaned out all of the drawers ,attic and storage room. I would like to take an upholstery class, but I just haven't wanted to commit myself to being at a certain place at a certain time every week. I have enough of that structure with ice skating every Monday and roller skating every Friday. The freedom is still intoxicating and I feel like a care free child, with a tad more responsibility, and a whole lot more money. I just wish the days didn't go by so fast. I think once the rental properties are out of my life in about two more years, inner child will be really dangerous.
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Old 03-09-2017, 10:37 AM
 
Location: Las Vegas
14,229 posts, read 30,031,639 times
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I am busy procrastinating about that same photo project. Sometimes it's just too easy to let things wait.

However, I remember all too well my pre-retirement decades where I kept multiple schedules and to to lists. I am probably too willing to cut myself some slack!
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Old 03-09-2017, 11:08 AM
 
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
34,711 posts, read 58,042,598 times
Reputation: 46177
Quote:
Originally Posted by Serious Conversation View Post
I'm sure some people get into the "contest" mindset, but as we all age, we realize there is less and less time to do the things we always wanted to do. ...I'll be 31 next month. ...
Most people before retirement are locked into a fairly standard routine out of necessity - ...
not really (for most of us... life, our ENTIRE life, has been anything BUT a standard routine) By age 31, I had relocated my young family 2000 miles, was on my 4th house, and had been a caregiver for 13 yrs - out of necessity, not choice. Nothing was routine, each day was filled with unknowns (running a 'fresh market farm', home schooling, caregiving, and working a night shift factory job) took life as it rolled.
Quote:
Originally Posted by twowilldo View Post
Conversely ...
We can all see this playing out in family members and make conscious efforts to stay active both physically and mentally for sure.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Suzsilk View Post
After retirement my husband and I hit the ground running. ... "What's the rush?" We haven't settled into a hard and fast routine, which is fine with me.


Quote:
Originally Posted by animalcrazy View Post
... We travel less now because of not being able to find the perfect pet sitter yet to replace the great one we had. We still do projects, but we have more time for fun. The fun times seem to interfere with the projects T.. I have enough of that structure with ice skating every Monday and roller skating every Friday. The freedom is still intoxicating and I feel like a care free child, with a tad more responsibility, and a whole lot more money. I just wish the days didn't go by so fast. ...
great post, ENJOY that freedom, every minute of freedom!

Different strokes for different folks. It is good that we are all quite different.
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