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I enjoy being alone for a few days, but then I miss my dining partner. Normally we eat out most evenings, and there's nothing sadder than asking for a table for one. We do different things during the day often, and enjoy catching up with each other over a nice meal and some wine.
Nothing sadder than asking for a table for one? There's a million things sadder. Especially because this is not sad at all.
Seems like most of the people who commented in this thread enjoy being alone. That surprised me.
Perhaps if I was alone for a few months, I'd get used to it. But I'm also thinking that perhaps my wife and I get along well because neither of us is a control freak. She can do whatever she wants to do, and so can I.
Furthermore, we have a huge house with our own multiple spaces. For example, if her TV is too loud, I can go downstairs into my office and shut the door. If she is working on an art project, she can spread it out all over the living room floor. No harm.
If I want to restore a classic car in the garage, I have a vacant space waiting.
Perhaps there is a benefit to not downsizing.
I miss having the entire upstairs of a separate garage building to myself. DH's music tastes intersect some with mine, but there are other things he likes that made me hurry out there. Especially times when he would idly pedal a bike trainer while watching TV sports, with that awful, nonstop AnnouncerTalk blathering away at high volume. No doubt he disliked some of my activities, too. But with an entirely separate building, we could indulge those tastes without irritating the other person.
When I got into one of my Zoned modes, I had scads of wadded up papers and other detritus from projects, and I liked to leave it that way until I reached a good stage of completion before tidying up. I was, and still have to fight a natural tendency, a clutterbug. And after working hard to greatly improve that natural clutterbugness, I really did not like anybody else messing with *my* system of organizing things!
Meanwhile, he hated visible clutter...but woe be it to an unsuspecting person (me) who opened a closet door or tried to find something on his garage shelves! The solution was simple: separate shelves and work/play rooms.
I know there's a heap of high judgmentalism frowning on such indulgences, but they don't cost that much to keep the peace and allow each spouse to have some fun at home.
Re "doxie," live and learn! My apologies, Selena. I guess my mind is more evil than I had thought. But I'm still giggling at what I now know to have been my mistake.
not a typo at all- doxie is a very common term for dachshund.
Doxy (sometimes doxie) is also very old slang for a mistress or prostitute. Like the other person who responded, I laughed when I read that you lived alone except for your doxie.
Example sentence from the Oxford English Dictionary: ‘Indeed, he maintained a clutch of doxies on the second and third floors of his own establishment.’
Re "doxie," live and learn! My apologies, Selena. I guess my mind is more evil than I had thought. But I'm still giggling at what I now know to have been my mistake.
No need to apologize...it is funny now that I know the other meaning.
Live and learn!! Now I'm trying to remember everywhere I've written "doxie".
Goodness... I thought everyone had heard of "doxie for short." I plan to get adopt one when I retire (when I'll have sufficient time to devote to him)... And he'll probably ALSO be my only companion, too. They make darned good ones... Better than most people...
Goodness... I thought everyone had heard of "doxie for short." I plan to get adopt one when I retire (when I'll have sufficient time to devote to him)... And he'll probably ALSO be my only companion, too. They make darned good ones... Better than most people...
I was always a cat person but my doxie has changed my mind. He's 9 and if I ever get another dog..it will be another doxie. They are so funny and clever....and STUBBORN but so was my late husband.
Doxy (sometimes doxie) is also very old slang for a mistress or prostitute. Like the other person who responded, I laughed when I read that you lived alone except for your doxie.
Example sentence from the Oxford English Dictionary: ‘Indeed, he maintained a clutch of doxies on the second and third floors of his own establishment.’
Seems like most of the people who commented in this thread enjoy being alone. That surprised me.
Perhaps if I was alone for a few months, I'd get used to it. But I'm also thinking that perhaps my wife and I get along well because neither of us is a control freak. She can do whatever she wants to do, and so can I.
Furthermore, we have a huge house with our own multiple spaces. For example, if her TV is too loud, I can go downstairs into my office and shut the door. If she is working on an art project, she can spread it out all over the living room floor. No harm.
If I want to restore a classic car in the garage, I have a vacant space waiting.
Perhaps there is a benefit to not downsizing.
I have been alone for 40 years. For me, it's neither here nor there... it just is.
But my observation from reading the comments here is that if you are a couple and then lose your spouse, you are dealing with 2 things... grief at the loss of the spouse and living as a single person. These are 2 different things to work through.
The person who sits in a recliner all day watching tv, reading and googling, who then loses a spouse, will obviously need to learn to get out of the house.
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