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Old 03-12-2017, 05:12 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mlb View Post
I'm not yet retired....

Our CAO retired last week after 31 years. There was a retirement party at work and because he was beloved many showed up.

Another former coworker - who really was a curmudgeon and very stressful to work with showed up to the gathering. I could not believe how relaxed he looked. There were no lines in his face and his voice was calm. It was a remarkable change from the interactions I had with him on a daily basis where he was run ragged.

How long did it take you? And did you have to take measures into your hands to rid yourself of the stress?
I was terminated 7 months ago and still haven't found work however, it took about 6 months to purge the toxins from the company out of my system. I don't have a paycheck yet I'm still in a better state of mind.
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Old 03-12-2017, 06:23 PM
 
Location: S.W. Florida
2,206 posts, read 930,610 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mlb View Post
I'm not yet retired....

Our CAO retired last week after 31 years. There was a retirement party at work and because he was beloved many showed up.

Another former coworker - who really was a curmudgeon and very stressful to work with showed up to the gathering. I could not believe how relaxed he looked. There were no lines in his face and his voice was calm. It was a remarkable change from the interactions I had with him on a daily basis where he was run ragged.

How long did it take you? And did you have to take measures into your hands to rid yourself of the stress?
I'm nearing five months into retirement and I think it was in month three that I felt the stress begin to melt away. It took a lot of talking things out with my wife to rid myself of bitterness against my management team for the way I was treated the last couple of years,but I rarely even think of them now.
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Old 03-12-2017, 06:44 PM
 
Location: SW Florida
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For me, it took about a year to stop having panic attacks and longer to stop having nightmares that I still had to go to work.
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Old 03-12-2017, 08:19 PM
 
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Great question! I retired 11 months ago from a 29 year career - multiple companies. I too had a very stressful job and it required extensive travel (as a consultant), the last few years. One of the reasons I decided to retire was my sheer exhaustion and stress / burnout. So, after three months I stopped looking at the clock and thinking about what I would have been doing - with some sense of loss or guilt. After six months I was no longer replaying scenes from work in my head (sometimes repetitively and painfully - this must have been some sort of healing process. As others have noted most of these scenes were from years ago and involved being confronted or exposed by a person with whom I had not had an authentic / respectful relationship. Sometimes these were scenes that did occur, sometimes they were extensions -- mine were daydreams / flashbacks.). Not pleasant, actually and this went on for months. Then, thankfully, wound down.

Each time I passed through a new phase I thought I was 'finally retired' -- but who knows?

I had my blood pressure measured last week for the first time since I retired and it's 20 points lower! (Both numbers). So, I am, in fact, calmer and healthier again. I'd say just in the past 2-3 months but I feel better and still more confident everyday. I should note that I wasn't expecting this. I was exhausted, yes, but I didn't realize I had lost myself as much as I had. I didn't realize how much healing I had to do.

Good luck on your journey. I cannot encourage you enough to take this step as soon as you are able.
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Old 03-12-2017, 08:21 PM
mlb mlb started this thread
 
Location: North Monterey County
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bayarea4 View Post
TV station work hours are the worst. It's almost impossible to have any sort of normal family or social life, and the stress is awful, too. I wasn't a producer but worked in the control room as a technician (audio, graphics, camera, playback, etc.) I worked different crazy schedules for 26 years, and I have chronic insomnia to show for it.

That kind of lifestyle really messes with you. I still can't go to sleep or get up at "normal" hours. So maybe the stress hasn't completely left me after all.
I have another good friend whose husband did the same work you did. But the runup to the recession were horrific years for them - moving every couple of years because of his work - Alabama, Pennsylvania, Minnesota, Florida....... and then she couldn't do it anymore and divorced.

He remarried and moved to Oregon and was diagnosed with brain cancer which he succumbed to within a year.

I truly believe work stress was to blame.
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Old 03-12-2017, 10:47 PM
 
14,258 posts, read 23,979,216 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mlb View Post
Thanks!

I have a niece who worked in television news (producer) in the Bay Area and San Diego. Horrific work hours - I think she went in to work at 1:00AM and worked way more than 40 hours. But she was young and it was well before she started her family.

I can't imagine being in that line of work over a long period of time. It would kill me.

There are a lot of things that many of us did earlier in our career that we quit doing around age 40. After a while, I think that a lot of people realize that it is just not worth it about 35 or 40.
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Old 03-12-2017, 11:06 PM
 
Location: San Francisco
16,415 posts, read 5,350,870 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jlawrence01 View Post
There are a lot of things that many of us did earlier in our career that we quit doing around age 40. After a while, I think that a lot of people realize that it is just not worth it about 35 or 40.
I realized it was not worth it but had to keep going anyway for financial reasons. The job paid well, I didn't want to give up my seniority and five weeks' vacation and my husband also worked there. An even more compelling reason was that work in my field has dried up to almost nothing. So even though I wondered if it were possible to die from stress - it was that bad at times - I sucked it up and made the best of it for another 20 years.

After retiring I volunteered for a medical study on telomeres. These are the fringe-like tips of our DNA which are longest when we're born and shorten over time. When they get too short, the body's cells can no longer regenerate, and we die. Stress is one factor that can shorten telomeres. After the study I asked to be told what my telomere length was. Much to my shock (because longevity runs in my family), my telomeres were in the lowest 20th percentile for my age group! No doubt all the stress at work contributed to shortening my life. That's a big price to pay for seniority, a pension and five weeks' vacation.
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Old 03-13-2017, 06:17 AM
mlb mlb started this thread
 
Location: North Monterey County
3,178 posts, read 2,853,807 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bayarea4 View Post
I realized it was not worth it but had to keep going anyway for financial reasons. The job paid well, I didn't want to give up my seniority and five weeks' vacation and my husband also worked there. An even more compelling reason was that work in my field has dried up to almost nothing. So even though I wondered if it were possible to die from stress - it was that bad at times - I sucked it up and made the best of it for another 20 years..
This. In spades.

How many people you know circa the recession can retire at age 40?

My stress is from the fact that I am the primary provider. My spouse's career dried up with the recession.....he's a salesman and was paid in commissions only. Pretty much slavery. Never found a job that paid what he was used to getting when the companies he worked for fired everyone and only hired back at a third the wages.

I worked to keep us afloat and then that became the default.
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Old 03-13-2017, 06:55 AM
 
13,316 posts, read 25,550,246 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bayarea4 View Post
After retiring I volunteered for a medical study on telomeres. These are the fringe-like tips of our DNA which are longest when we're born and shorten over time. When they get too short, the body's cells can no longer regenerate, and we die. Stress is one factor that can shorten telomeres. ...
Yow. I wonder if I even have any left, between night shift work and the actual job at the psych hospital. I've been home recovering from some surgery for five weeks now and have lost 20 pounds with no particular effort but no stress. (have some 30 left to go for optimal health). Jan. 1 (or Feb. 1) can't come soon enough.
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Old 03-13-2017, 07:11 AM
 
Location: Location: Happy Place
3,686 posts, read 1,866,292 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by brightdoglover View Post
Yow. I wonder if I even have any left, between night shift work and the actual job at the psych hospital. I've been home recovering from some surgery for five weeks now and have lost 20 pounds with no particular effort but no stress. (have some 30 left to go for optimal health). Jan. 1 (or Feb. 1) can't come soon enough.
I was going to post something similar.
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