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At 25, I left the best job in the world to move to Santa Fe. I had driven through Albuquerque at age 20 and wondered what it would be like to live somewhere so different from the East Coast. Thought I'd done my homework (got the local newspaper) and moved to join the Carpenters' Union as an apprentice. Thought I had done my job homework.
Found out that I am a lousy carpenter (poor eyesight, weak right wrist). The culture shock and crime against women at that time was overwhelming. (1978) I didn't know I was badly depressed and had thought that moving was what I needed. I lasted six months, the few friends I'd met had left town, I was on unemployment for the winter and just packed up the car and came back to New England.
Of note, the several times I dashed up to Colorado from Santa Fe for some reason or another, I felt like I was going home. I considered moving up there, but was burnt out on moving and very short of money.
So it took me a mere 40 years to get a plan to move to Colorado. April, 2018. Retirement (no job worries) and most friends gone from New England anyway.
But those things don't tell you what the culture is, what the vibe is, if people are friendly, how well you will be accepted...all the things that you can't tell til you've lived there. I've impulsively moved a LOT. One that I regretted was a move to the Jersey shore. Really fun place in summer, and I liked the quiet in winter. Except I didn't realize how "Podunk backwoods" the atmosphere was when all the shoobies left. I had moved from a big-city metro suburb, and was not used to the ridiculous small-town politics, like spending all their time recalling mayors or complaining about the DJ being fired from the Elks. And the gossip. And your car being recognized wherever you were parked and then nosy people asking why you were there. And having to drive an hour to decent shopping and two hours for decent healthcare. I left after two years....lost money, of course but oh well...live and learn.
A lot of people get the impression that small town living is quaint and homely, almost like something you'd see in a travel brochure or on Andy Griffith. IMO, the reality is much different.
My town is about 50,000, so not too small, but still small enough to where you see the same faces serving food, customer service, if someone doesn't know you, they know someone who does, same people at the gym, etc. I frequent two Jersey Mikes sandwich shops and I don't even have to tell them how I want my sandwich - they know. Sometimes that's good, sometimes it's bad.
Things can get very gossipy, very quickly, especially if it's a sensational story, like what my uncle is doing, or if it's a small community. One of my best friends is gay, and it seems like every gay man here knows every other gay man.
I get the shopping concerns. Things like nutritional supplements, condiments (can't find some BBQ sauces I like here), clothes (almost always get my clothes in different metros, 100 miles away), etc., aren't even available in my area. Costco - two hours away. We only have Super Walmart and the smaller, older style of Target. No Meijer. Groceries are dominated by one major regional chain. Prices are higher compared to major metros I've been in recently (yes, I've made grocery price comparison lists). When I used to be able to just run out to numerous stores within 10-15
I moved back to northeast TN from an affluent, big city suburb as well, and sometimes I just miss the anonymity of being able to go somewhere and no one recognize me or try to make small talk. If my family wasn't here, I'd probably live in a bigger metro area. Yes, it's a pretty area and the weather is nice, but when you're in the office 8-5 5 days a week an on-call 1/4 weekends, that's maybe six days a month where I can really get out and enjoy it. Is it worth it then?
We had been living in Alabama for 27 and 30 years, 11 of them together. DH was in his early 60s, with retirement (pensions) on the horizon. I was late 40s, with 10+ more years to work. We started thinking about where we wanted to eventually retire, and decided on the southwest. I had lived in ABQ as a kid, he in Tucson. We focused on New Mexico.
At some point in early 2013 I got the bright idea that if I could find a job making X in NM, that we could go ahead and move now rather than wait for me to work another 10+ years in Alabama. DH was on board, and we made a trip out that fall to take a look around. I started applying for jobs that summer, and by December had an offer that was $4 a year less than the threshold I had set. (Yes, I said four dollars). We went for it. I was moved out here by February while DH stayed back to get the house sold, etc.
It's been a great move for us. My career has actually moved along better here than it ever did in AL, and the climate and scenery can't be beat.
We had been living in Alabama for 27 and 30 years, 11 of them together. DH was in his early 60s, with retirement (pensions) on the horizon. I was late 40s, with 10+ more years to work. We started thinking about where we wanted to eventually retire, and decided on the southwest. I had lived in ABQ as a kid, he in Tucson. We focused on New Mexico.
At some point in early 2013 I got the bright idea that if I could find a job making X in NM, that we could go ahead and move now rather than wait for me to work another 10+ years in Alabama. DH was on board, and we made a trip out that fall to take a look around. I started applying for jobs that summer, and by December had an offer that was $4 a year less than the threshold I had set. (Yes, I said four dollars). We went for it. I was moved out here by February while DH stayed back to get the house sold, etc.
It's been a great move for us. My career has actually moved along better here than it ever did in AL, and the climate and scenery can't be beat.
Never been, but it looks absolutely gorgeous. Glad it has worked out for you!
The thing that I have seen foul up retirement plans the most is: Grandkids. Once they come along, the whole plan can change.
From the stories I've heard and read, the grandkids affect the wife in a couple far more than the husband. But hey, happy wife, happy life.
In our case, we have no kids together and I have no kids at all. He does have grandkids back in AL/GA. He makes trips back several times a year for a business we still have there, and gets to spend more quality time with them then than he ever did when we lived nearer.
A week after making the trip to see our second grandchild, DH came home and told me we were pre-approved for a mortgage and if we didn't move to FL now, by the time we retired we would miss the grandkids growing up. Who was this man?!
I was not prepared and had not given any serious thought to living in FL, but I fully retired and he took a relocation package a few months after the move. We closed on the house in FL three months after seeing the new baby. That was one whirlwind summer.
It still makes me smile when I think about it. Impulsive was not an adjective I would have used for us before.
Moving to be close to kids/grandkids hardly qualifies as a "bold move" that the OP was asking about.
I read "throwing caution to the wind" and "impulsive", not bold in the OP's post and answered accordingly. Let me clarify my answer.
We moved on an impulse without a lot of thought and yes, the grandkids were the catalyst. DH's job was going to go national and he figured he could bridge between both places for a few months. Oh, it went national alright, 18 months later: corporate-speak for soon. In the meantime, a position in the Southeast was posted within his company with more visibility and money. He interviewed and got it along with a relocation package.
Moving to be near grandkids may "hardly qualify as a bold move", in your world, but it was for us. One day we were going about our daily lives in NY and three months later we were living in FL.
FL was never on our radar for retirement as we had no plans of retiring anywhere.
That impulsive move did pay for relocation, no state income tax for the past five years and living in a FL coastal town with sunny beaches. Poor us, we just live by the grandkids and aren't bold enough for you. I can live with that.
Last edited by jean_ji; 04-27-2017 at 11:29 AM..
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