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Just a few weeks ago I was at a small get together having a discussion with a known male chauvinist pig. He treated my opinion as if I didn't have a brain or any business sense. It didn't end well...lol...I pulled out that 'used to be a bigshot' card and I played to win Hey....lol...someone had to speak up!!!!!! Don't treat me as if I never held a job in my life when I ran a successful business. Certain situations deserve a pass!
At 86 there could be an issue of diminished respect and minimized contributions. Contact an oral history librarian and have him record his personal recollections. At that age he might have a lot to talk about.
The idea of contributing to Oral Histories is a good one. Not long ago, the topic of propeller-driven
commercial aircraft was being discussed among a group of retired gentlemen, comparing the culture
of air travel back then and now. One gentleman smiled quietly from the fringe of the more active group.
This continued for some time till, one of the others spoke up with, "Hey, Charley, didn't you use to work
for XX airlines?" Smiling,"Charlie" said in a low, almost shy voice, "Yes, I worked for XX for over 20 years" The topic turned to a specific question regarding a type of airliner, to which "Charlie" answered the question from a perspective few of those present had even considered. When "Charlie" was asked "what did you do at XX" His reply was, "Oh, I ran it for a few years, till YY bought it"! For a moment you could have heard a pin drop, then the questions erupted from every quarter! Later, when we were walking back through the parking lot, "Charlie" , laughingly said, "Damn, I should have kept my mouth shut"
In the months since then "Charlie" has been invited to every aviation function offered in the region!
He recently said," I've eaten more chicken in the last year, than in any previous year". He seems to
enjoy himself. As was once said: "It ain't braggin' if you did it!"
My 86 year old father USED TO BE a big shot. He used to be the chairman of the board at the local country club; the "go-to person" for favors, a very successful businessman and one of the wealthiest people in the medium sized town he lived in. Everyone deferred to him and treated him like a king.
Now he lives in a retirement community in a larger town and he still tries to act like a big shot. But now most people think he is just a braggart and doesn't care about his successes from 30 years ago.
What is it about older people who think just because they were big shots years ago when they are young, anyone cares about that when they are in their 80s today?
Does your financial, career and social successes and failures from your younger days impact your persona today as a retired person?
What on earth is wrong with someone being proud of the accomplishments they've made in their lives? It's hard to be retired, some men feel they need a purpose and feel groundless without it, so he lives a bit too much in the old days. So what???
Why do some dismiss older people so quickly? Why not learn how he made it so far in his career? I work in nursing homes, and I love to know what people did and accomplished when younger.
What is the time limit that one has to be proud of their accomplishments? How long does Brett Favre have to be proud of his football career before he is expected to shut up and go sit in the corner because his time has come and gone?
What on earth is wrong with someone being proud of the accomplishments they've made in their lives? It's hard to be retired, some men feel they need a purpose and feel groundless without it, so he lives a bit too much in the old days. So what???
Why do some dismiss older people so quickly? Why not learn how he made it so far in his career? I work in nursing homes, and I love to know what people did and accomplished when younger.
What is the time limit that one has to be proud of their accomplishments? How long does Brett Favre have to be proud of his football career before he is expected to shut up and go sit in the corner because his time has come and gone?
I agree to an extent. But the OP's concern is that the other senior residents consider him a braggart because of his behavior. Sounds like he just comes on too strong and they don't like it. There's a difference between sitting in the corner saying nothing and constantly trying to play the big shot.
Before I retired, many new acquaintances would ask "what do you do" and the discussion would continue around "heavier" topics, like business, politics, the economy. Now when I say retired the conversation centers around grandkids, hobbies, travel. I much prefer the latter.
I agree to an extent. But the OP's concern is that the other senior residents consider him a braggart because of his behavior. Sounds like he just comes on too strong and they don't like it. There's a difference between sitting in the corner saying nothing and constantly trying to play the big shot.
If that's the case, I'm gonna guess that's always been his personality. People don't just suddenly become braggarts when they retire, he was probably a braggart when he was 20....but the entire thread is basing it on the fact that he's old now, asking "Why do old people become braggarts"?
What is there to base that on? Why make a thread about one person who is a braggart and then try to extropolate that to "Retired folks who used to be big shots"?
I find that a strange phenomenon on this board, attributing personality defects to whatever larger group a person is a part of. "I knew this single mother who steals things from people's home when she goes to visit them" becomes a thread "why do single mothers steal?".."I know this rich guy who never tips" becomes a thread "Why don't rich people tip?"
Just a thought, but men in general get a LOT of validation from their careers. Way more so than women. Their community positions, jobs, etc, all form a huge part of their identity. When removed from that, it becomes difficult.
When we lived and worked in DC-Metro, party chatter was always first and foremost where (and for whom) you worked.
Here in Central Mexico, among the expats we know and like the best, what someone did in their career is rarely discussed. If an expat feels compelled to tell us glowingly about their work exploits, the rest of us snicker and figure s/he has given themselves a "border promotion."
Before I retired, many new acquaintances would ask "what do you do" and the discussion would continue around "heavier" topics, like business, politics, the economy. Now when I say retired the conversation centers around grandkids, hobbies, travel. I much prefer the latter.
I am retired but in my area we still talk about ourselves and each other when we meet. We still ask questions about the past. We still compare where we were in life say in 1968 . We share stories of life.
Being old and retired does not mean you quit being you. You still are the owner of that business you started from scratch. You still are that teacher who made amazing progress possible for so many people. You have not changed. You just no longer do those jobs, BUT you like meeting people who are similar, who had similar experiences. You like sharing your life-especially if you are a story teller. But you also listen to others who may have had totally different experiences in their lives to learn about them, too.
It is not really bragging it is sharing who you are. In reality everyone brags about something. It just may not be their jobs they talk about. By 86, living in a retirement community you don't really have a lot of fun things happening in your life any more to talk about. Talking about the past gives you comfort-especially if your kids are like so many who never visit or can only visit once or twice a year.
Even as a young person when you go to a meeting, a party, etc where there are people you have not known since you were 4, you ask questions to get to know that person......What do you do for a living ? Where do you live? What are your hobbies or clubs you belong to, etc. You try to find common ground to have things to talk about.
Talking about past accomplishments, silly things you did, your family before the kids grew up, vacations, and even the grandkids if you have some are what old people do. I would rather hear what you did in the past than about the trouble you have pooping, shingles, or the surgery you had last year like so many old people talk about.
BTW hearing about someones' grandkids accomplishments gets really, really boring to others too. We do not know them and it gets old either hearing old people brag about them or tell you what scum their grandkid is because he has piercings and tatoos etc. . It is amazing how grandparents tend to try to one up each other about their kids and grandkids.
Even though I am a woman, you(original OP) would find me sitting with the people you say are bragging about what
they did in the past. But then maybe I am a braggart too.
I probably should have just put this without a quote. Sorry not really aiming anything at this quote in particular.
Just a thought, but men in general get a LOT of validation from their careers. Way more so than women. Their community positions, jobs, etc, all form a huge part of their identity. When removed from that, it becomes difficult.
I will vouch for that. My husband misses the saying do this do that and actually having others jump to it. The family and I just shake our heads and say......"get up and get it yourself".
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Hey....lol...someone had to speak up!!!!!! Don't treat me as if I never held a job in my life when I ran a successful business. Certain situations deserve a pass! 
