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Old 08-09-2017, 04:54 AM
 
10,604 posts, read 14,199,749 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by M3 Mitch View Post
Not even a little twinge of regret you didn't stay in Italy?

Your spread in Maine sounds good, really, but if I were suddenly confronted with either having to move to Maine, or move to Italy, you know, I would at least check out the available real estate in Italy. Not that I have anything against Maine.
Have you ever lived in Italy or even been there?

Everyone has these idealized visions of EU countries.

Try living in one (versus a whirlwind vacation).
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Old 08-09-2017, 05:10 AM
 
7,981 posts, read 3,464,079 times
Reputation: 11230
I never had a question about retirement. Guys I worked with had reservations about Being with their wives all day. If you have most everything paid off. What is the problem? We don't live forever you know....
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Old 08-09-2017, 05:32 AM
 
71,535 posts, read 71,712,424 times
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i love being with my wife , but i also enjoy doing my 1 day a week consulting work and interfacing with lots of others .
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Old 08-09-2017, 05:33 AM
 
Location: Central IL
15,224 posts, read 8,523,201 times
Reputation: 35622
Quote:
Originally Posted by luvmyhoss View Post
My BH has no plan. I regret that because I'm his recreation.
Gets old
True - it's a lot of pressure and why should you be responsible for his enjoyment? I feel like I'm just dragging my guy along behind me trying to entertain him!
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Old 08-09-2017, 06:09 AM
 
Location: RVA
2,165 posts, read 1,265,978 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bayarea4 View Post
It would have been OK to draw down some savings as we could afford to do so, and Mr. Bay's retirement income alone would have been almost enough to live on. But I just didn't want to do it. The reasons were more psychological than financial. I couldn't bring myself to start drawing down capital. Transitioning from saving to spending is a big hurdle and I suspect it's a not-uncommon issue for newly-retired people. Also, it was really hard for me to adjust to not having an income of my own and not contributing to the household budget. I felt guilty about every penny I spent on myself because it felt like "his" money and not ours.

Perryinva, I was under the impression that what you are describing is a strategy called "file and suspend" and was no longer an option, but I will check into it. Thanks!
File and Suspend is not an option in order to allow your spouse to file on yours for people born after 1953. You are older than that, so grandfathered in anyway. In any case, that is not F&S, that is just Suspend, which anyone can do after FRA. If you do not want to payback the last years SS, then you can just suspend, and get a years worth of increases. It USED to be you could pay back 8 years worth, then start at the fully delayed amount, but naturally, only the wealthy took that stratefy, so the loophole was closed! My close friends father did just that, and died last week at 92. He made more on the tax free borrowed money than he had to pay back, and came out way ahead. He was not really wealthy, but no where near poor, but as a frugal Scot, loved how it worked out.

Remember, if you do pay back a years worth and suspend until 70, you do not get the 8% of FRA increases, but rather the increases you would have gotten if you filed at 64, plus the COLAs between 64 and and when you file. So if you are the average $1200/mo, expect it to be maybe $1400-1450/mo. Like I said, free to inquire. You have to look at it as the cost of a maybe $200mo ($2400/yr) COLA annuity (plus the 2 year time value of the money) for $28,800. Thats a 8% return annuity guaranteed income, which is a great deal.

I am VERY familiar with the psychological issue. DW filed at 62 and it was purely psychological, as I am still working and we positively do not need or even want the money now. "I paid in to it my whole life. I want it NOW. I want my own money to spend. Its free money." (The irony is she doesn't spend it, it sits in her credit union making 1%, except for the $6500/yr we stick in her IRA) I even pointed out that by waiting to take hers until I retired, when she will be almost 68, I could actually retire sooner, as I would not have to replace the extra $400/mo it would have been. That only paused her for a second. Then started the what if I die before then, and the "all the money we can save inbetween is worth it". In the name of harmony, I agreed, but also because I knew it was possible to suspend hers when I retire, and pay back a year, if at the time it clearly made more sense financially..

Last edited by Perryinva; 08-09-2017 at 06:25 AM..
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Old 08-09-2017, 06:47 AM
 
Location: SW Florida
10,287 posts, read 4,865,859 times
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I'm semi retired - I really had no plans for retirement other than just to quit working and not have any schedule. I quickly found out that was boring and went back to work two days a week 15 months ago. I was never into traveling so my goals are just to enjoy & remodel the small, older 2 bedroom house I am buying and possibly adopt a dog. I really have no regrets; I live in Florida, a place most people want to retire to and I have a decent pension from my late husband.
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Old 08-09-2017, 07:32 AM
 
6,310 posts, read 5,053,602 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tominftl View Post
I never had a question about retirement. Guys I worked with had reservations about Being with their wives all day. If you have most everything paid off. What is the problem? We don't live forever you know....
I think it is crazy when people complain about being with someone they "love" all day long. I hear and read about it all the time. It is mostly women so good (I guess) to hear that men don't look forward to that either. Some of course, not all.
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Old 08-09-2017, 07:48 AM
 
Location: Forests of Maine
30,680 posts, read 49,443,611 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clemencia53 View Post
I think it is crazy when people complain about being with someone they "love" all day long. I hear and read about it all the time. It is mostly women so good (I guess) to hear that men don't look forward to that either. Some of course, not all.
During the first 20 years of our marriage, whenever I was 'home' it was like I was a temporary visitor in her house. To break it down into individual months, most of those months I was deployed, so we had no communication between us. Months when I was 'home' I was often in rotating shift-work.

It was not until after I retired that we finally lived together fulltime week after week.

My retirement was a big change for us.

My Dw went to work soon after I retired.

I would never 'complain' about living with my wife. It is far better than working was.
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Old 08-09-2017, 07:54 AM
 
6,310 posts, read 5,053,602 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Submariner View Post
During the first 20 years of our marriage, whenever I was 'home' it was like I was a temporary visitor in her house. To break it down into individual months, most of those months I was deployed, so we had no communication between us. Months when I was 'home' I was often in rotating shift-work.

It was not until after I retired that we finally lived together fulltime week after week.

My retirement was a big change for us.

My Dw went to work soon after I retired.

I would never 'complain' about living with my wife. It is far better than working was.
So do you think your wife went to work after you retired to get away from you?

My sister brags about being married for 50 years but is so happy that her hubby is gone for days at a time.

And don't tell your wife that you like being with her because it is better than working! Tell her it is because you love her and only her and couldn't go a day without being around her -
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Old 08-09-2017, 10:42 AM
 
Location: Lakewood OH
21,699 posts, read 23,661,739 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fallstaff View Post
Because we all don't have those opportunities but we do have requirements to be met.
And, at least in this culture, Gawd hep ya if you become too much of a job hopper trying to find your bliss. Some people say we should all strive to find what we're best at and do what makes up happy. I say you can strive but that doesn't mean you'll find it. Also, and this is very important, if everyone did only that which was their heart's delight and oh so fulfilling, who would do all the actual work in this world? The things that need to be done that nobody would find appealing but only hard, dirty, dangerous, tedious, or soul crushing. OOH! I want to do a tedious, dangerous, taxing, soul crushing thing for a living! No such demographic

And what if you find THE THING you are made for and actually get to do it? But it doesn't pay well enough? Then you're a bum, lazy, "not pulling the wagon," either down and out or getting some sort of "welfare" and will be castigated either way.

Just some thoughts and perspective ;-)
Many times the things people do or love the best can't be an avenue for supporting themselves. I always wanted to be a stage actress. I was good at it, performing in community theater and other amateur shows. It's very difficult to make a living off it though and I don't think I could have done that. So instead I spent my working life doing office work. I didn't hate it but when I didn't have to do it any longer I was happy. Now I'm in a senior's play reading group and it's great. I have lots of time for it.

The idea is no one has to love their job and no one has to give up what they do love. It's possible to do both.
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