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Old 09-23-2017, 12:11 AM
 
Location: Albuquerque NM
1,668 posts, read 1,535,371 times
Reputation: 3657

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Quote:
Originally Posted by davidt1 View Post
Wow, this thread is even more depressing than the "Retire with no money" thread. Didn't read the whole thread. But I do have one question for those facing old age with no family to count on: do you think you made a mistake by not having a family?
There was a thread called "Question for retirees without children (by choice)" posted in August that asked a similar question. You might be interested in reading it. Of course not having children is not quite the same thing as not having a family. One could have a spouse or be close to siblings and their children, thus having a family, without having children.
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Old 09-23-2017, 04:52 AM
 
Location: NY>FL>VA>NC>IN
2,524 posts, read 1,001,838 times
Reputation: 5346
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
How thoughtful of you! lol
I am completely serious. How selfish to leave a carcass for folks to find and clean up; may as well minimize the effort needed. Remote woods, best way and yes most considerate way.
My 2nd husband killed himself w/a shotgun blast in a RENTED condo; how effing selfish is that. The landlord had to deal with the resultant mess. Horrible.
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Old 09-23-2017, 04:55 AM
 
Location: NY>FL>VA>NC>IN
2,524 posts, read 1,001,838 times
Reputation: 5346
Quote:
Originally Posted by matisse12 View Post
definitely not, not a mistake.

don't let the swerve and off-track topic of killing oneself let you think that the vast majority of people are interested in it - the vast majority are not interested - even way more than the vast majority are not interested.....

1 or 2 people get on an idea and run with it - do not extrapolate that it applies to anyone but those 1 or 2 in this thread

many false impressions can be had from reading some threads
I totally agree. Very few are candidiates for logical suicide; I only recommend it for extreme cases obviously.
For most folks alternatives do exist
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Old 09-23-2017, 11:55 AM
 
Location: Sugarland
13,779 posts, read 12,775,138 times
Reputation: 16645
Quote:
Originally Posted by OverItAll View Post
I am completely serious. How selfish to leave a carcass for folks to find and clean up; may as well minimize the effort needed. Remote woods, best way and yes most considerate way.
My 2nd husband killed himself w/a shotgun blast in a RENTED condo; how effing selfish is that. The landlord had to deal with the resultant mess. Horrible.
Sorry to hear that.
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Old 09-23-2017, 01:16 PM
 
11,212 posts, read 8,598,226 times
Reputation: 28270
Quote:
Originally Posted by davidt1 View Post
Wow, this thread is even more depressing than the "Retire with no money" thread. Didn't read the whole thread. But I do have one question for those facing old age with no family to count on: do you think you made a mistake by not having a family?
It wasn't by choice. It just happened. My family was older and generally in poor health and they all died. I never had a relationship that progressed to marriage. I never got pregnant out of wedlock.


I have no regrets. I have no fear. I'll continue to take care of myself like I have been doing for decades.
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Old 09-23-2017, 02:27 PM
 
Location: NY>FL>VA>NC>IN
2,524 posts, read 1,001,838 times
Reputation: 5346
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
Sorry to hear that.
He was a real POS. Sorry for the landlord I hope you mean. He did the world a favor when he eliminated himself.
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Old 11-07-2017, 09:58 PM
 
Location: Midvale, Idaho
1,549 posts, read 2,390,939 times
Reputation: 1961
Quote:
Originally Posted by coschristi View Post
I'm not one but I can see how there is a big difference.

We read all the time, including right here on CD; the experiences of people & families that have relocated to care for, or assumed power of attorney, despite being "long-distance", of elderly relatives.

An elder orphan, to me at least; would be someone without anybody. Not next door, the next town, next state, continent .... just nobody.

When things get to a certain point, accomodations can & are; made at the last minute with existing family all the time. I'm sure it's terrifying to think that your getting older, prone to falls, maybe getting forgetful while knowing that your daughter is neck deep in a far away state with her job & family.

But what ends up happening many times (sometimes not) is that family comes first & family members will do "the right thing" when it's that time. When there is nobody though?

That means zero zip zilch. No name to enter on "Next of kin" line. Those with uninvolved or far away at least have a name, even if the zip code is different.
Not always true. Technically I am an elder orphan. Adopted as a baby I have no legal ties to the birth family I found when I was 32 years old. I have only seen them a handful of times in all these years. I know there is no way any could help me either physically or financially.My half siblings are the ones needing medical help. All of them in terrible shape and all living over 1500 miles away. All of them born after me but never took care of themselves. Serious heart and diabetes issues. Needless to say I do not even have phone numbers or addresses to put as next of kin. I put a local friend here. Sadly her health is also failing.

My whole adoptive family is dead. I had no children by choice.
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Old 11-07-2017, 10:05 PM
 
Location: Midvale, Idaho
1,549 posts, read 2,390,939 times
Reputation: 1961
Quote:
Originally Posted by charlygal View Post
It wasn't by choice. It just happened. My family was older and generally in poor health and they all died. I never had a relationship that progressed to marriage. I never got pregnant out of wedlock.


I have no regrets. I have no fear. I'll continue to take care of myself like I have been doing for decades.
Good for you charlygal. I am in the same boat only I was married for thirty one years. No children. Now widow. Going to have to do as you. It is a real incentive to stay strong and fit and do the best to maintain good health and clear mind as long as possible.
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Old 11-08-2017, 10:59 AM
 
7,839 posts, read 4,422,326 times
Reputation: 11677
Quote:
Originally Posted by LittleDolphin View Post
Well, this is cheery. How about we choose to live and form our own communities and look out for one another?
Or form a community to shoot each OTHER? Then we won't flinch and miss! (just kidding, of course)
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Old 11-10-2017, 11:31 AM
 
Location: Milwaukee Area of WI
1,886 posts, read 1,300,796 times
Reputation: 1988
Quote:
Originally Posted by BugsyPal View Post
Cannot speak for elsewhere, but here in New York City middle-aged and or seniors die all the time in their homes "alone". Often they lie there for several days until the stench prompts someone to call 911.


On my block alone in the past several years there have been about ten or so older persons who died in their homes "alone". Of the most recent was an elderly woman who must have fallen and hit her head; they found her in the bathroom days after she passed.


Then there was this sad story that one thinks posted about here at the time:


https://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/18/n...y.html?mcubz=1


https://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/20/o...l.html?mcubz=0


The Lonely Death of George Bell
Just read the whole article. How very sad!!
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