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Old 08-30-2017, 11:12 AM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,769,401 times
Reputation: 32309

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Quote:
Originally Posted by selhars View Post
I never met Robyn and didn't know her personally, or at all I guess you should say.
But I loved seeing her posts here, and reading them.

It's a funny thing about the human condition we call "life"....how can you feel so sad about the loss of a person you never met -- except through posts online.

Reading that she just got the news about the Stage 4 diagnosis just in December makes me so sad.

Growing up I always heard the phrase, "No day is promised to anyone." My mom wound expound: Life is short, and can end at anytime. So try to live with as few regrets as possible. If there's someone you want to call -- CALL THEM. If there's some place you want to go: GO. Something you want/need to say to someone: SAY it. A gift you bought for someone in July to hold for December...GIVE it now. Because neither one of you may be here tomorrow -- let alone 5 months from now. That way there doesn't need to be any wailing and "climbing in the casket."

I hate the feeling of loss that comes with missing a loved one. But if they lived a full life and I concentrate on the joy and memories they leave me with...I contemplate it all, and feel sad, happy, consoled and buoyed all at the same time.

That's how I'm feeling now about a person I never even met. Robyn, you'll be missed here. Thanks for the smiles you've left me with.

Interesting thoughts. You and I have been here on this forum since 2010, and over time we feel we have come to know certain people to the point where there is sadness if they die or encounter real rough patches otherwise. We may even know some posters whom we have never seen in person better than some people we see superficially at work every day because being anonymous here, we may tend to bare our souls more.
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Old 08-30-2017, 11:17 AM
 
230 posts, read 192,619 times
Reputation: 535
Quote:
Originally Posted by selhars View Post
I never met Robyn and didn't know her personally, or at all I guess you should say.
But I loved seeing her posts here, and reading them.

It's a funny thing about the human condition we call "life"....how can you feel so sad about the loss of a person you never met -- except through posts online.

Reading that she just got the news about the Stage 4 diagnosis just in December makes me so sad.

Growing up I always heard the phrase, "No day is promised to anyone." My mom wound expound: Life is short, and can end at anytime. So try to live with as few regrets as possible. If there's someone you want to call -- CALL THEM. If there's some place you want to go: GO. Something you want/need to say to someone: SAY it. A gift you bought for someone in July to hold for December...GIVE it now. Because neither one of you may be here tomorrow -- let alone 5 months from now. That way there doesn't need to be any wailing and "climbing in the casket."

I hate the feeling of loss that comes with missing a loved one. But if they lived a full life and I concentrate on the joy and memories they leave me with...I contemplate it all, and feel sad, happy, consoled and buoyed all at the same time.

That's how I'm feeling now about a person I never even met. Robyn, you'll be missed here. Thanks for the smiles you've left me with.
^^^^^ If I could have put it into words, this is what I would have said. Thank you Selhars.
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Old 08-30-2017, 11:27 AM
 
Location: Tampa, FL
27,798 posts, read 26,267,219 times
Reputation: 14611
Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
we see superficially at work every day because being anonymous here, we may tend to bare our souls more.
I'm more open and post with less regard to a person's feelings and more blunt in my posts than I am w/ ordinary life acquaintances and even friends - probably more "in your face and assertive" than in real life because what the hell, who cares, it's only a message board....but probably more my true self.
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Old 08-30-2017, 11:37 AM
 
Location: Milwaukee Area of WI
1,886 posts, read 1,299,133 times
Reputation: 1988
Quote:
Originally Posted by selhars View Post
I never met Robyn and didn't know her personally, or at all I guess you should say.
But I loved seeing her posts here, and reading them.

It's a funny thing about the human condition we call "life"....how can you feel so sad about the loss of a person you never met -- except through posts online.

Reading that she just got the news about the Stage 4 diagnosis just in December makes me so sad.

Growing up I always heard the phrase, "No day is promised to anyone." My mom wound expound: Life is short, and can end at anytime. So try to live with as few regrets as possible. If there's someone you want to call -- CALL THEM. If there's some place you want to go: GO. Something you want/need to say to someone: SAY it. A gift you bought for someone in July to hold for December...GIVE it now. Because neither one of you may be here tomorrow -- let alone 5 months from now. That way there doesn't need to be any wailing and "climbing in the casket."

I hate the feeling of loss that comes with missing a loved one. But if they lived a full life and I concentrate on the joy and memories they leave me with...I contemplate it all, and feel sad, happy, consoled and buoyed all at the same time.

That's how I'm feeling now about a person I never even met. Robyn, you'll be missed here. Thanks for the smiles you've left me with.
That was very nicely said. I feel the same. Thank you for putting it so beautifully
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Old 08-30-2017, 11:46 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,378 posts, read 6,390,348 times
Reputation: 9967
Quote:
Originally Posted by selhars View Post
I never met Robyn and didn't know her personally, or at all I guess you should say.
But I loved seeing her posts here, and reading them.

It's a funny thing about the human condition we call "life"....how can you feel so sad about the loss of a person you never met -- except through posts online.

Reading that she just got the news about the Stage 4 diagnosis just in December makes me so sad.

Growing up I always heard the phrase, "No day is promised to anyone." My mom wound expound: Life is short, and can end at anytime. So try to live with as few regrets as possible. If there's someone you want to call -- CALL THEM. If there's some place you want to go: GO. Something you want/need to say to someone: SAY it. A gift you bought for someone in July to hold for December...GIVE it now. Because neither one of you may be here tomorrow -- let alone 5 months from now. That way there doesn't need to be any wailing and "climbing in the casket."

I hate the feeling of loss that comes with missing a loved one. But if they lived a full life and I concentrate on the joy and memories they leave me with...I contemplate it all, and feel sad, happy, consoled and buoyed all at the same time.

That's how I'm feeling now about a person I never even met. Robyn, you'll be missed here. Thanks for the smiles you've left me with.
I agree. Ive been celebrating my 30 years anniversary with my husband for several years now. I never know for sure about things in life. Not waiting until the exact date to celebrate for that exact reason.
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Old 08-30-2017, 11:48 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,378 posts, read 6,390,348 times
Reputation: 9967
Quote:
Originally Posted by BucFan View Post
I'm more open and post with less regard to a person's feelings and more blunt in my posts than I am w/ ordinary life acquaintances and even friends - probably more "in your face and assertive" than in real life because what the hell, who cares, it's only a message board....but probably more my true self.
Same here. I'm not known to be the one with the most tact in real life, but I certainly tone it way down in real life.
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Old 08-30-2017, 12:01 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,685 posts, read 17,651,107 times
Reputation: 27772
Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
Interesting thoughts. You and I have been here on this forum since 2010, and over time we feel we have come to know certain people to the point where there is sadness if they die or encounter real rough patches otherwise. We may even know some posters whom we have never seen in person better than some people we see superficially at work every day because being anonymous here, we may tend to bare our souls more.
People will definitely share more in relatively anonymous environments than directly where livelihoods may be on the line.
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Old 08-30-2017, 02:41 PM
 
Location: Cushing OK
14,547 posts, read 17,583,592 times
Reputation: 16777
In a way, Robyn was lucky. Her body sickened, but she kept her mind. She could speak with her family and friends, and say good bye. Death in itself is not our enemy. Often it comes as a relief. But to become lost in your own mind, forget your family and friends and life as they die is the saddest. All I could do with my father was siitting there and telling him I was his daughter over and over. Before that he insisted Mom was still there, and would be mad that I didn't get her. When he forgot ALL of it, just a body that breathed, I would have wished his death that day, as he slept.

But he lasted months. I didn't visit. He knew nothing. They finally decided he'd had an artery to the brain which had narrowed considerably, and led to a loss of oxygen. It was inoperable. I agreed with the doctor to cease means of keeping him 'alive' and he passed soon after, or perhaps he was freed.

I am not afraid of death. I am afraid of leaving in the state my father was in, and the pain it brings to those who love you.

I would love a fixed thread or topic for those who have touched many here, and will be missed. How would we 'officially' suggest this to the people who run this board?
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Old 08-30-2017, 02:48 PM
 
Location: too far from the sea
19,917 posts, read 18,928,736 times
Reputation: 33877
Quote:
Originally Posted by nightbird47 View Post
In a way, Robyn was lucky. Her body sickened, but she kept her mind. She could speak with her family and friends, and say good bye. Death in itself is not our enemy. Often it comes as a relief. But to become lost in your own mind, forget your family and friends and life as they die is the saddest. All I could do with my father was siitting there and telling him I was his daughter over and over. Before that he insisted Mom was still there, and would be mad that I didn't get her. When he forgot ALL of it, just a body that breathed, I would have wished his death that day, as he slept.

But he lasted months. I didn't visit. He knew nothing. They finally decided he'd had an artery to the brain which had narrowed considerably, and led to a loss of oxygen. It was inoperable. I agreed with the doctor to cease means of keeping him 'alive' and he passed soon after, or perhaps he was freed.

I am not afraid of death. I am afraid of leaving in the state my father was in, and the pain it brings to those who love you.

I would love a fixed thread or topic for those who have touched many here, and will be missed. How would we 'officially' suggest this to the people who run this board?
You would pose the question in About the Forum. http://www.city-data.com/forum/about-forum/
The senior mods come in there and answer questions.
__________________
my posts as moderator will be in red. Moderator: Health&Wellness~Genealogy. The Rules--read here>>> TOS. If someone attacks you, do not reply. Hit REPORT.
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Old 08-30-2017, 03:31 PM
mlb
 
Location: North Monterey County
3,197 posts, read 2,868,733 times
Reputation: 4902
Oh that makes me so sad.

In the last 4 months I lost an online friend who died too young (42) from Stage 4 Colon cancer.

She was a vet tech - and was instrumental in helping me deal with the terminal cancer of my first golden retriever. She helped me find an oncology vet and walked me through the process.

I never met her in person - but I knew her and felt her spirit.

Don't tell me these friends are invisible. They grace our lives just like those in front of our faces.
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