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Old 08-23-2017, 01:14 PM
 
Location: Coastal Georgia
37,152 posts, read 45,694,157 times
Reputation: 61867

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Although they started out with the Ozzie and Harriet life, the fates interfered. They got married during the war. Mom was pretty and Dad was a handsome Air Force navigator. After the war, they bought a little house and had 3 kids. Dad worked for the same company his father helped found.
Mom died at 40. After awhile, Dad married an alcoholic, and managed to pickle his liver by the time he was 70. They could have enjoyed a very prosperous retirement, playing golf and traveling, but instead, my dad's pension went keeping the second wife in a nursing home.
I'm about to turn 70, and hope my liver hangs in for a good while yet. If I had a do over, I wouldnt take my parents life, because I'd have been dead 40 years ago.
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:17 PM
 
Location: The South
5,243 posts, read 3,645,924 times
Reputation: 7943
My parents were just good ordinary, hard working folks, spent their lives working in a textile mill,no retirement plan. They survived on a $400/month SS check. I didn't want to do that.
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:28 PM
Status: "0-0-2 Game On!" (set 8 days ago)
 
Location: The beautiful Rogue Valley, Oregon
7,316 posts, read 15,368,793 times
Reputation: 9503
Absolutely not. My mother wasn't able to finish high school, let alone college, because it was more important that the family be able to send her 3 younger brothers (all of whom turned out badly) to school. So she worked in the fields picking crops from age 14 on. She married young (16) to a fairly abusive alcoholic who was killed in a training accident in WW2. Her second husband was no good deal, either. When she met my father, his entire family threw a fit that he had taken up with a shameful divorced woman, enough so that my father's parents and his sister did not attend their wedding. Both my parents had to work to support their families, even after they were married. My father was fortunate enough to go to school nights on the GI Bill - my mother worked whatever day job she could get, often low-status and poorly paid. One of the reasons I have never hired a house cleaner is that I sometimes went with my mother on her house cleaning jobs and never forgot how she was treated.

By the late 70's, my father's career had finally paid off and he was in middle management in a large corporation and they had more money, enough to afford a fairly nice house. But my mother died in 1985.

I see so many posters rambling on about how "ideal" the 50s and early 60s were - that depends entirely on who you are and what your family status was.
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:29 PM
 
Location: the Old Dominion
295 posts, read 150,184 times
Reputation: 1382
Default No...

My father was the most irresponsible person I know.
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:36 PM
 
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, originally from SF Bay Area
29,854 posts, read 54,552,867 times
Reputation: 31223
Quote:
Originally Posted by fallstaff View Post
HA! Not a chance!

My whole life has been an attempt to counteract their lives. Anger, ignorance, and alcoholism wouldn't have made me happy.
Same here. They had 9 kids, fought all the time and were miserable. My father beat us and wouldn't let us do anything fun at all. Very unhappy time of my life until I finally moved out while in college at age 19 and got my own apartment, having saved from the job I started at age 14, though my father took a big chunk of it since he was also on my savings account. Fortunately I got my own savings and checking accounts at 16 and stopped contributing to that joint savings account. I have modeled my marriage and parental role by doing the opposite.
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:37 PM
 
Location: Lake Grove
2,753 posts, read 1,978,897 times
Reputation: 4459
Quote:
Originally Posted by nicet4 View Post
I would have been miserable, poor and very unhappy.
Same here, to say the least
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:48 PM
 
9,151 posts, read 7,224,621 times
Reputation: 13848
No! No! No!
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:57 PM
 
12,825 posts, read 20,160,725 times
Reputation: 10910
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChickPea77 View Post
As you are now

What I mean copied your parents life , I mean every aspect work amount of children , marriage etc
Nope.

My parents were in the work place for over 10 years prior to the bad inflection point of wage growth that hit during the early/mid 1970s. They were in tech, during a time when there was not very much competition for tech jobs. They rode the wave from the early semiconductor era into Web 2.0. They bought both childhood houses for what would be considered a pittance these days, and rode the successive appreciation waves. They had help from their own parents getting started and got decent inheritances. So many advantages I did not have.

I will never reach my parents levels of attainment. It's not for a lack of talent, discipline or trying. It's macro stuff.

Given all of this, in order to avoid being yet another debt ridden, depressed, "middle American," I have had to do lots of things very different from how my parents did it. No kids. Inner ring / urban all the way. Sort of bohemian. As a result, I have a survival plan. Had I done it like they did, I probably would have ended up one sad soul.
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Old 08-23-2017, 02:08 PM
 
Location: Lakewood OH
21,698 posts, read 23,688,776 times
Reputation: 35450
Nope.
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Old 08-23-2017, 02:10 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,647 posts, read 17,615,071 times
Reputation: 27716
I'm already living too much like them in the same routine in the same boring town. It's not a happy place to be.
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