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Old 08-25-2017, 08:19 AM
2,952 posts, read 1,641,880 times
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NO WAY! Think if I had, I would of gotten cancer like my mother to get out of living in the boring midsize midwest city.
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Old 08-25-2017, 12:11 PM
Location: The sleepy part of New York City
1,959 posts, read 1,211,991 times
Reputation: 4337
oh my gosh no.. My mom was the stereotypical housewife. Apron included. Quite honestly I have very few memories of her not being in the kitchen.

Dad, on the other hand, as much as I loved him because of the way he treated me was even worse than Archie Bunker. But because he was so racist towards EVERY nationality, I just couldn't believe that and came to the conclusion early on that he was wrong.

So, it's all good. Without trying to mom taught me there's more to life than being on call night and day and dad taught me tolerance and acceptance.
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Old 08-25-2017, 12:27 PM
Location: Eastern Washington
14,252 posts, read 44,946,726 times
Reputation: 12861
Not at all. My parents lived a very modest life, never going far from home, Dad kept the same (not really that good IMHO) job since before I was born. And, duh, since they were my parents, they had kids, were not child free.

I have taken a completely different path. I guess their path worked for them, I know my path worked for me.
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Old 08-25-2017, 12:37 PM
Location: Omaha, Nebraska
7,323 posts, read 4,169,633 times
Reputation: 18377
My parents' lives were fine, but not for me. I'm not them.
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Old 08-25-2017, 12:49 PM
13,322 posts, read 25,578,684 times
Reputation: 20520
When this question was first posed, I didn't think of the economic aspects of parents' lives. I was thinking of the other aspects, including marriage/children and overall life stuff, least of which I thought of money.
Both of my parents had severe depression that got expressed in different ways- compulsive gambling, emotional shutdown, severe anxiety, resentment. There was no abuse (and I'm grateful for that now that I know more about it happening)but the household, besides not having enough money because of the gambling, was like being under a suffocating cover. No conversation, no laughter, not much of anything.

I have grown up with my own depression but got treatment (although I still always tread carefully).

I remember my mother yelling at my father once (they were mired in mutual contempt all their lives, moderating to him pitying her at the end of life) "We eat, we sleep, and we sh*t, and that's all we do!" and I determined to never be able to say or think that.

I also determined to never expect any monetary gain from a man or marriage. It was based on my experience growing up and bolstered by feminism, 1960s/70s version. It was the first reason I knew to not want to be a parent (although others were pretty clear soon thereafter).

I was always fond of my father- he was a lot easier to be around than my mother- and what few good things I took away from their household came from him- dogs, the daily newspaper and some kind of interest in international affairs (he was a WW2 combat vet). I still love to watch baseball. He took me to horseback riding lessons for a time and it was the only thing that kept me going as a child. There were no issues between us towards the end of his life and it was poignant to me when he died.

I never believed in marriage per se, and certainly was not drawn to anyone that would make a good marriage. (If so, I should have married my high school boyfriend). I still hope for good company but have no concept of family except for chosen family, which I prefer to think of as friends, good friends being as sacred to me as family seems to be to others.
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Old 08-25-2017, 12:55 PM
Location: NJ
972 posts, read 2,422,614 times
Reputation: 1840
Hell no! My parents had an unhappy marriage, had tight finances and had kids, and they were unhappy. My life is the opposite and I am really grateful for that.
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Old 08-25-2017, 02:36 PM
Location: in the miseries
3,302 posts, read 3,582,652 times
Reputation: 3810
They depended on their children. Of whom only 2 participated

Worked and worked
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Old 08-25-2017, 02:38 PM
Location: Dallas, TX and Las Vegas, NV
5,700 posts, read 4,429,448 times
Reputation: 11695
As the daughter of a Holocaust survivor Dad and an excommunicated Catholic Mom who grew up in hardship circumstances, I wouldn't want their early lives.

But I have admiration for the marriage they built and the lives they created as immigrants to the USA. They were devoted to eachother and enjoyed some travel and their very beautiful home until Dad's death at age 80. Mom passed away at age 90 and her last 10 years were spent slipping into dementia and filled with sorrow over the loss of her husband.

How can I say I would want that for myself? I will always appreciate the solid foundation they provided, the sacrifices they made and the love they had for their children and eachother.
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Old 08-25-2017, 03:48 PM
Location: Near Manito
19,521 posts, read 20,913,887 times
Reputation: 13858
I don't know about "copying", but if I can achieve a fraction of the love and respect my parents inspire in the hearts and memories of their children, grandchildren, and friends, I will consider myself a success. Having spent their young adulthood in the Depression, they never graduated from high school, and worked blue-collar jobs their whole lives, yet provided their family with a solid home, wholesome food, plenty of love, and died not owing anyone a penny.
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Old 08-25-2017, 04:05 PM
3,625 posts, read 1,563,586 times
Reputation: 2531
Originally Posted by ChickPea77 View Post
As you are now

What I mean copied your parents life , I mean every aspect work amount of children , marriage etc
Same number of kids, same degree but they purchased everything without debt
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