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Old 08-26-2017, 11:42 AM
 
2,132 posts, read 1,005,162 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thinkalot View Post
I think you are getting old and boring. What in the hell is wrong with dessert? You say it like it is a bad thing. Fatty appetizers? What's the big deal about those. It's not like you eat them every day with every meal.
As you get older, your metabolism slows waaaaay way down. So fatty appetizers and dessert ARE legitimately of concern. Besides which - just because you're ok with something doesn't mean the OP has to be as well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by snowtired14 View Post
I don't think we know you well enough to answer your question, it sounds like your social personality is in some kind of transition. If you're in your 70's or 80's, it may be age related but if you're in your 50's or 60's, isn't that too young to lose interest in socializing? The older I get, 60's, the more I enjoy getting out and watching life and talking with people, watching them enjoy themselves, it makes me feel good and I would consider myself an introvert.
I'm in my 50's/pushing 60's. I have little interest in "socializing". There is nothing more boring than listening to people rattle on about TV shows, FOX news, golf, etc etc. I am ESPECIALLY bored and annoyed by people who think the current administration has given them free rein to express their heinous bigoted views. Last time I got stuck in a small group of bigots I attempted to excuse myself politely and was accused of being a "special snowflake" who can't stand to "have (my) views challenged".

Damn straight, Skippy. I DON'T want my "views" challenged because they are the CORRECT and RIGHT views. If you have got it in for blacks, browns, Jews, Moslems, Catholics, Romani, or any other minority (including women) I'm not going to tolerate or listen to your bigotry. Period paragraph. You are in the wrong and I'm not going to waste time "socializing" with you and your ilk. They are not worth my time and I don't want to associate with reprehensible people like that.

I don't know why, but I'm far more likely to run into these types of a**holes than any other type of a**hole. I know for a fact they are not the majority, though obviously they comprise the majority of people of roughly my age group who I keep running into. I suspect they're just loudmouths who can't keep it shut and so stand out for that reason alone, while folks like me are keeping our opinions to ourselves and avoiding these situations.

So "socializing" (as in going out and meeting up with strangers or near strangers) holds little interest for me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by snowtired14 View Post
Do you enjoy being old and boring?
That's a pejorative question. I don't think losing one's taste for eating out all the time makes you old and boring.

Old, we can't help - as long as you live you will keep getting older. Boring doesn't even enter into the equation.

Boring is what OTHER PEOPLE think of you. Bored is what you think of your specific situation. If you're not bored, boring doesn't matter. If you ARE bored, boring still doesn't matter - it is not about impressing other people with your non-boring-ness, it's about finding things to do with your time that interest YOU. Whether or not these activities are of any interest whatsoever to someone else is totally irrelevant.

Quote:
Originally Posted by snowtired14 View Post
If not, change that, dinner out doesn't necessarily have to be about the food. You could go to a quiet exclusive restaurant where waiters fuss over you while you shovel gastronomic delights into your mouth and everyone is careful not to intrude on the guests at the next table.<snippage>
SUUUUURE you could - if you are independently wealthy. And IF you are the sort of person who finds being fussed over by servants somehow exciting. I don't. Plus I really really object to paying for the opportunity to be annoyed by fawning waiters.

I'd much rather find something to DO than to be done TO.

But that's just me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Clemencia53 View Post
I would be concerned that you don't find going out to dinner with just your spouse as appealing as in going with the whole family. <snippage>
Why? There's nothing "worrisome" about that. You see your spouse every day all day. Going to dinner with your spouse isn't going to be more interesting than simply eating dinner at home.

When you go with the whole family, on the other hand, you get to hear what's new in their lives, how the grandkids are doing in school or what funny thing they said/did the other day, etc etc etc.

It's the get-together of people you care about but do not necessarily see every day that makes a dinner out "exciting" and special. Plus not having to cook for them and clean up afterward makes it that much more enjoyable.

Quote:
Originally Posted by cb2008 View Post
I am in my 60's as well. I don't know maybe I do like being old and boring. I am quite happy and contented, until I start wondering if I should be doing something different.
When one is happy and contented, one doesn't need to do anything different - unless you want to. When you say you "start wondering if (you) SHOULD be doing something different", that sounds like it is coming from outside sources.

Read above about the difference between "boring" and "bored". Only the latter is of consequence.

Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza61nyc View Post
<snippage>
whew, I gotta say so many of these answers are seriously depressing. Is that all there is to being a senior, eating dinner alone with the cat, never leaving the house?? lol.
OF COURSE not! I, for instance, eat dinner alone with my finches and parakeets.

Hang in there, folks. If you're bored, that's one thing, and you can work on that. However, if you are worried about "being boring" - I'd suggest working on worrying less about what other people think and relying more on your own sense of contentment rather than other people's judgmentalism.
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Old 08-26-2017, 12:38 PM
 
6,321 posts, read 5,058,385 times
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okay - just had conversation with two seniors - 65 and 68 years old

We are in the middle of a hurricane watch. Just going to have lots of wind and rain here.

They are BORED being at home. How can that be?

Following the storm chasers and being right there with them in the middle of the action was not boring.

Neither follows social media. They have smart phones, but that is as far as it goes.

There is a whole world out there that they are missing. No need to be bored. Look at all of us on here sharing stories and ideas.
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Old 08-26-2017, 07:41 PM
 
3,135 posts, read 1,724,698 times
Reputation: 3514
I can get so involved in my own activities that I enjoy, sometimes I feel I need to look up, get my head out of the books I am immersed in, and make some plans so there will be "events" in my life. Vacation. Lunch dates. Dinner out with spouse. Meet friends.
And I do that. But I just don't find them as exciting and fun as they used to be. Been there, done that. I find it just as enjoyable, actually more, puts a smile on face, when I can feel the afternoon sun on me, see it filtering through the woods from my deck, and just sit there and study the birds.
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Old 08-27-2017, 08:12 AM
 
6,321 posts, read 5,058,385 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cb2008 View Post
I can get so involved in my own activities that I enjoy, sometimes I feel I need to look up, get my head out of the books I am immersed in, and make some plans so there will be "events" in my life. Vacation. Lunch dates. Dinner out with spouse. Meet friends.
And I do that. But I just don't find them as exciting and fun as they used to be. Been there, done that. I find it just as enjoyable, actually more, puts a smile on face, when I can feel the afternoon sun on me, see it filtering through the woods from my deck, and just sit there and study the birds.
Well there is nothing wrong with changing things up. My family will ask me why I don't cook or have as many plants as before.

I tell them - done with that, got my fill, tired of it - so time to move on.

The only thing I can't get away from are my pets. But the puppy I picked up from a gas station this week is definitely going to a rescue group!

Have two groups interested already. Has had first shots and wormer, flea treatment. Already have her spay being taken care of when time. I'm getting better at letting them go.
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Old 08-27-2017, 11:49 AM
 
Location: Straddling two worlds
2,534 posts, read 803,938 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza61nyc View Post
Join the groups then hook up with some one who has similar interest. Seriously. when my husband died, if I had to wait for someone to do something with I would have never left the house.

My city has many "meet ups" and I try to go to the ones that sound interesting. First they are free, so no skin off the nose on that one. Some times they are horrible, some times they are ok (but I won't be back), and once in a while there is one that really engages me.

whew, I gotta say so many of these answers are seriously depressing. Is that all there is to being a senior, eating dinner alone with the cat, never leaving the house?? lol.
Since my husband died many, many moons ago, I have been accustomed to doing things by myself. Recently celebrated my 65th birthday with a trip to NYC (where I grew up), Broadway show and late night session at a jazz club. I'm still working full time, but hoping to retire in Jan-Mar 2018 and where I end up has to be somewhere I can afford to do all of that, at least once in a while, which will NOT be in a 55+ retirement community (even if I could afford it ). Also, my 23 year old son still keeps me on my toes, even though he's happily living his own life now. I also love being home playing my keyboard, painting with watercolors and watching British/Ozzie television on Acorn tv.
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Old 08-27-2017, 03:30 PM
 
Location: Northern panhandle WV
3,007 posts, read 2,172,300 times
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I never really did enjoy much, and now I don't enjoy anything expect perhaps a few specific food items, but then I usually pay for such indulgences.
you notice my motto under my screen name is Waiting for God is there for a reason!
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Old 08-27-2017, 03:32 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,740,386 times
Reputation: 32304
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza61nyc View Post
.........................................

whew, I gotta say so many of these answers are seriously depressing. Is that all there is to being a senior, eating dinner alone with the cat, never leaving the house?? lol.

I agree with you, but a lot of people claim to enjoy being reclusive, and perhaps they really do. Personally, I don't understand it, so I can't really decide if most of them are telling the truth or deluding themselves. It's good we don't all have to be the same.


Over large population samples, people who are socially isolated tend to die sooner, but that doesn't mean that some of the socially isolated don't thrive. Also, we should keep in mind that some folks have been socially isolated for their entire life times, so it may not represent a new path upon becoming a senior.


One poster has written that she has never had a single friend since high school. I find that inexpressibly sad. I do remember her user name, but I am withholding it here.
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Old 08-27-2017, 03:45 PM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
31,679 posts, read 19,975,978 times
Reputation: 45745
Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
I agree with you, but a lot of people claim to enjoy being reclusive, and perhaps they really do. Personally, I don't understand it, so I can't really decide if most of them are telling the truth or deluding themselves. It's good we don't all have to be the same.
I'm an introvert, my happy place is by myself. I'm not deluding myself, I have friends and activities. I am quite self entertaining books, hobbies, household stuff, pets.... My husband is pretty much the same, and we are most happy when it is just us.

I do understand the importance of friendships, so I continue to cultivate them.
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Old 08-27-2017, 03:50 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,018 posts, read 17,740,386 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikala43 View Post
I'm an introvert, my happy place is by myself. I'm not deluding myself, I have friends and activities. I am quite self entertaining books, hobbies, household stuff, pets.... My husband is pretty much the same, and we are most happy when it is just us.

I do understand the importance of friendships, so I continue to cultivate them.

In my view, being an introvert is not at all the same as being a recluse. You are not a recluse, because you "have friends and activities", and you "continue to cultivate" friendships.
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Old 08-27-2017, 04:03 PM
 
Location: Greenville, SC
4,650 posts, read 3,704,540 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
In my view, being an introvert is not at all the same as being a recluse. You are not a recluse, because you "have friends and activities", and you "continue to cultivate" friendships.
Reclusive means you avoid human contact, out of fear or distaste. It sometimes means there's some psychological problem behind it. Introverted means you enjoy the company of humans, but with limits: after being with people you need to recharge your batteries with alone time. Introverted is a normal personality type.

The problem is -- extroverts sometimes have a hard time seeing this, and see introverts as being stuck up or "not right" and will even try to "convert" them to their version of "normalcy".

Having one's preferences for what one enjoys doing change over time isn't a sign of either reclusion or introversion. It's called people change over time -- even in the latter part of their lives. None of what the OP said sounds to me like either reclusion or introversion -- just changing preferences over time.
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